Most embarrassing fart cover up story?

[stinkypete]

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I swear that this story is true and that I am not exaggerating at all.

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stories with disclaimers like this are always either exaggerated or they just suck. this one just sucks.

[Madpokerbluffsman]

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Mine happened in my freshman year of high school at a new school in a new town. Several days into the first week at a very silent moment in class, I ripped a loud one. A few people definitely knew it was me, and in retrospect it wasn't a big deal, except i decided i needed to cover it up, so in a loud emphatic voice i said "YESSSSS!!!!" and pumped my fist (in the the classic elbow drop fashion that accompanies the "YESSSSS!!!" so well). i am not sure if anyone thought the fart was intentional (which i suppose was the impression i was instinctively trying to make), but everyone in the room including the teacher just stared at me in shock for a second or two. not one person laughed at me or made a comment or even a face (other than a look of shock). it was just too pathetic.

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This is the funniest thing I have ever read on 2+2.

[Kowalski]

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Mine happened in my freshman year of high school at a new school in a new town. Several days into the first week at a very silent moment in class, I ripped a loud one. A few people definitely knew it was me, and in retrospect it wasn't a big deal, except i decided i needed to cover it up, so in a loud emphatic voice i said "YESSSSS!!!!" and pumped my fist (in the the classic elbow drop fashion that accompanies the "YESSSSS!!!" so well). i am not sure if anyone thought the fart was intentional (which i suppose was the impression i was instinctively trying to make), but everyone in the room including the teacher just stared at me in shock for a second or two. not one person laughed at me or made a comment or even a face (other than a look of shock). it was just too pathetic.

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Reminds me of Jackass 2 where Steve-o wears that helmet and Preston [censored] into the funnel connected to a tube connected to the helmet. Steve-o pukes. Nasty.

[ActionJeff]

damn.

Well, I guess you had to be there.

and I said that because the few times I've told this story, no one believed the actual volume of the fart.

[alfa]

Army, close combat training. The guy training it had taken me to demonstrate these ultra cool super moves (not really) with him.

I had some stomach problems earlier the day.

Anyway, we go through all the steps slowly and a small pause after every move you are supposed to do. In one of these small pauses I am sitting on his face. Well this is when I semi accidently decide to make a super load and smelly fart. Since it was army no-one could realy laugh at it at the time but I sure did get some positive feed back after the training from friends. (everyone hated the dude)

What came to the training I can guarantee you I wasnt demonstrating any more moves after that.

[kleinstadt1]

I was in high school and it was during wrestling season. For those who don't know, when you're cutting weight you tend to get very backed up. Plus, any leftover fecal matter is just extra weight. I didn't want to take any of the chemical laxatives (Ex-Lax, etc.) so instead I took about 12 doses of Metamucil a day.

Raisin Bran has nothing on 12 doses of Metamucil.

I was regularly dropping some really foul smelling stuff. And very distinct as well. Anyone who I happened to be drilling with at wrestling practice definitely knew what I smelled like.

So I'm in history class, I drop a SBD, which quickly smells up the whole room. The teacher turns up his nose, and says, "Oh, God, who did that?". Based on smell alone, I was fingered by a member of my team. He opened the window and gave me a demerit (private school).

Random beat: my ex-girlfriend married a guy who now teaches at the same school, and wound up tutoring this teacher's partner (didn't know he was gay then) in chemistry while he was in nursing school.

[IlPug]

ok heres one.. was in mantova in italy while back on a school trip. we go to this old castle thats been turned into a museum, with all these great paintings and what-have-you..we go into this one smaller room (30 of us or so) and we're sort of standing there listening, when i let out what starts off as a small wheezy sorta fart that turns into this huge pant ripping sound. the look on my italian teachers face was priceless!

of course i tried to cover it up by squeaking my shoe on the marble floor very sheepishly.

[Mad Steady Eddie]

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I remember being in a food fight in the cafeteria in elem. school and getting taken to the principals office with the other kids. As the principal was scolding us, I leaned to the side to let out an SBDF and to my surprise, I ripped a 70 decibel cloud of stench. Wow was the principal pissed.

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LLMMFFAAOO

[orange]

There were a few times off the top of my head.

Once I was sittin in my dorm room, with me and my roommate. I felt a huge one coming along and I told my roomie "hey check this out." I walked to the middle of the room and spread my legs outward then let one rip. This one was huge...too bad I sharted myself in the process. I screamed and ran down the hall after.

[Five-Star]

Farting when someone is holding your feet during sit ups on the Army PT test. They can't do anything but just sit there and hold your feet down and bury their head into their shirt.