Funniest Simpsons line ever

[bismillahno]

The one I think I laughed the hardest to


Hi... ummm... let me have some of those porno magazines... large box of condoms... a couple of those panty shields [quickly] and some illegal fireworks [back to normal] and one of those disposable enemas.
Ehhh... make it two.

also, Ranier Wolfcastle as a kid in an ad...

My bratwurst has a first name
its F-R-I-T-Z
my bratwurst has a second name
its S-C-H-N-A-C-K-E-N-P-F-E-F-F-E-R-H-A-U-S-E-N

is it sad I didn't have to look up the name?

[doucy]

[ QUOTE ]
Lisa (on why Maggie doesn't talk): Remember, 'tis better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.


[/ QUOTE ]

I just want to make sure you are aware that Lisa Simpson is not the first person to use this quote.

[136913691369]

Halloween episode where the family turns into vampires:

Lisa: You have to kill the head vampire (to kill all the vampires)

Grandpa (while holding a wooden stake): Kill the boy (bart)!!

(Lisa: How did you know Bart was a vampire?

Grandpa: Bart's a vampire?!!? (runs off screaming)

[GrooveNougat]

[ QUOTE ]
A good one I haven't seen here yet.

That's not America! That's not even Mexico!

[/ QUOTE ]

That is a GREAT one. My other favorites:

when Homer buys a gun and carries it around shooting stuff:
"I feel so powerful, like how God must feel when he's holding a gun"

and

Chief Wiggum "it's a good thing you guys floated by this brothel" with the police guys all standing around in robes. Classic.

[Code 3]

Homer: That's it! You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college!

[wiseheart]

Apu: "Please do not offer my god a peanut"

[gutshotpeeler]

Mr. Burns: "I wonder if this Homer Nixon is of any relation?"
Smithers: I find that highly unlikely sir since they both spell and pronounce their names differently"
Mr. Burns: "B'ah! Schedule a game and I'll ask him myself"


and also


(from the clown college episode)

"Oh my God I'm seeing double!... 4 Krustys!"

[SoCalRugger]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Lisa (on why Maggie doesn't talk): Remember, 'tis better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.


[/ QUOTE ]

I just want to make sure you are aware that Lisa Simpson is not the first person to use this quote.

[/ QUOTE ]
What's your point? That was just the set-up for the funny part.

[doucy]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Lisa (on why Maggie doesn't talk): Remember, 'tis better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.


[/ QUOTE ]

I just want to make sure you are aware that Lisa Simpson is not the first person to use this quote.

[/ QUOTE ]
What's your point? That was just the set-up for the funny part.

[/ QUOTE ]

Touche. I need to improve my reading/Simpsons comprehension skills.

[nath]

This one is much better with the full exchange:

[ QUOTE ]
Homer: How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?

[/ QUOTE ]
Marge: That's because you were drunk!
Homer: And how...