Funny/strange things that have happened during sex...

[hoyasnaxa]

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I was so drunk one night doing a girl I had picked up at the bar earlier that I swung and missed trying to slap her in the ass.

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That is the funniest one yet.

[Metal_Rat]

More than once, (usually in the dark) I've been in bed with a girl and lost orientation of my position on the bed, rolled over and fallen on the floor. That's a major mood killer... though it's really funny when your date falls off instead.

[mak15]

i'm sure your friend really appreciated you nailing his ex-girlfriend. way to have his back.

[xorbie]

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as for the shampoo story, my nickname amongst friends is 'shamps' because of this incident and i still have a "Got Shampoo?" t-shirt...and it is original, i've never heard it anyone else tell this or a similar story...so i will take credit for that one.


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you have no idea how unintentionally hilarious this is.

[BCPVP]

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me and a friend were running the train on a girl in my basement with all the lights out, we were all wasted and i rubbed my hand on her p*ssy and got juice all over it and smacked my friend in his face, that was some funny sh*t


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No it isn't.

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another time me friend and his girl were drinkin with me at my house, we were all wasted he drank a little too much and went upstairs to puke and while he was up there his g/f pushed me down and pulled out my d*ck and pulled down her pants and hopped on it, we f*cked for a few minutes while he was puking and as soon as we heard him walking back downstairs we acted as if nothing ever happened, what can i say, she totally took advantage of me hahahahaha

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You are a jerk off.

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If you believe either of those stories, you should probably stop playing poker.

[Freerollin`]

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me and a friend were running the train on a girl in my basement with all the lights out, we were all wasted and i rubbed my hand on her p*ssy and got juice all over it and smacked my friend in his face, that was some funny sh*t


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No it isn't.

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another time me friend and his girl were drinkin with me at my house, we were all wasted he drank a little too much and went upstairs to puke and while he was up there his g/f pushed me down and pulled out my d*ck and pulled down her pants and hopped on it, we f*cked for a few minutes while he was puking and as soon as we heard him walking back downstairs we acted as if nothing ever happened, what can i say, she totally took advantage of me hahahahaha

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You are a jerk off.

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If you believe either of those stories, you should probably stop playing poker.

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No, I don't believe them. That doesn't change the fact that his first story was not, in fact, "some funny sh*t," or that he is a jerk off.

[mroels]

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as for the shampoo story, my nickname amongst friends is 'shamps' because of this incident and i still have a "Got Shampoo?" t-shirt...and it is original, i've never heard it anyone else tell this or a similar story...so i will take credit for that one.


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you have no idea how unintentionally hilarious this is.

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not as hilarious as what i first wrote which was, "i will demand to be given credit for that one"....i thought was would come off as a little too retarded...though i'd rather come off as an idiot than an a-hole.

[BongRips]

Valentine's Day this year, I go on a date with a friend of a friend during the afternoon, we shoot some pool and drink. Things progress and we decide to leave the bar, I didn't live in the city at this point, so my house was out, and she was living with her dad, so I have to think fast to salvage this. So I call up a friend (who lives with his mother) and ask if he minds sleeping on the couch, he tells me he'll be out having sex so his room is all mine. We get there, and it's like 10pm, and his whole family is home, including his sister who has told my friend numerous times she wants to sleep with me. We go into my friend's room, no sheets on the bed, insanely hot, smelly and a huge mess. Great. Anyway, turns out the girl is a screamer, and I have to get her to bite my neck to keep quiet (which doesn't really doesn't help anything, except making it look like I was hit with a bat) and we're [censored] like crazy so apparently all the family could hear was a thumping bed, a girl screaming and possibly me going "shhhhh" repeatedly. The best part would've been when she yelled "I'm gonna cum" really loud. I got reports from the family members after she passed out and I walked across the hall to smoke a joint. Including "My bed was shaking so I couldn't go to sleep" from my friend's 14 year old sister. I then proceeded to have a friend over, go shoot pool and drink beer while she was still passed out, then come back and have loud sex again at like 3am. Also apparently my friend's sister doesn't want to sleep with me anymore, though I thought the whole thing would be good advertising. [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

This was my neck after the fact:
neck

(poorly shot, but it's hard to shoot a picture looking at the viewfinder in the mirror)

[Redd]

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...I turn my head to see a rent a cop standing above us both with his gun pulled...
TT [img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]

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Please tell me that you're talking about him holding an actual, literal firearm.

[-W-]

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Some of these stories remind me of the stories in high school of the girl who got caught at school using a hot dog for something other than hunger satisfaction.

Every school has this story. And every person who tells this story says, "No, really, I know that it's true."

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Actually, that one probably happens more than you think. Or at least I know it happened once. There was one girl that graduated with my wife that tried this one her freshman year. I know because my mother was (now she works in ICU) an ER Nurse at the time. Rattled her to the core, as dear mother was raised in a pretty strict Mennonite family and came home rambling about how so and so was going to hell, and we all needed to pray for her.

You would think thought that it would be sooooooo much easier at that age to just go out and get laid.

-W-