Dumb jokes you still find hilarious

[HedonismBot]

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a fried egg on each shoulder and a pancake on his head. He says, "I'm worried about my brother."

[pootle]

Q. What's brown and sticky?


A. A stick.

[MrDiz]

Love yo momma jokes - yo mommas so fat she weighs herself on a Richter scale.

[RogerM]

Jewish kid goes to his dad and says
"Hey dad, can I have $40?"


Dad replies
"thirty dollars?, what do you need twenty dollars for?"

[FeNeF]

[ QUOTE ]
How do you know it bedtime at Micheal Jackson's house?























When the big hand touches the little hand.

[/ QUOTE ]
Hear about McDonald's new Michael Jackson burger?

Forty year old meat between eight year old buns!

[stigmata]

You Ask: "Guess What?"
Person replies: "What?"
You Reply: "Wow, Good Guess"

[DrewDevil]

Thread is tl;dr, so I apologize if this is a repeat.

Two peanuts were walking down the street, and one was assaulted. Peanut.

[sososoapy]

an old couple are celebrating thier 50th anniversary. they have a few drinks and the wife starts to strip for her husband.
wife: do you remember 50 years ago when you said you wanted to fck my brains out and suck my t!ts dry? well, what do you think now?
husband: i think i did.

[JJNJustin]

A poker amateur is asking a pro what the difference between a TAG and a LAG is.
The pro explains to him that tags are tight and aggressive and lags are loose and agressive.
The amateur says "I have a fairly aggressive game. What would you call this?" The pro thinks for a minute then responds "No we dont have any acronyms for that..."

-J

[dvsfun1]

This girl gets in a fight with her boyfriend just before he goes on a business trip. Now she has to meet him at the airport; and, not knowing what to expect, brings her friend along for support.
The guy arrives with a huge bouquet of flowers. Oh God, she says. Now I have to spend the whole weekend on my back with my legs up in the air.
Her friend says: What? You don't have a vase?