My Very Bad Trip to DC Trip Report (Rather Long, One Ugly Pic)

[MrWookie]

Last weekend, I went down to DC for a big swing dancing weekend. I'm pretty avid about swing dancing, and the reasons for this have everything to do with being straight rather than being gay. Comment if you must, however. Anyway, it ended up being a fair bit more than I bargained for. Here's what went down.

When I first getting ready for this trip, I was planning on going with my friend M. I had a class on Friday until 5 pm that I couldn't skip, and she worked until 5 on Friday, too. This would put us in DC about midnight or so, missing the first dance, but being able to make the one from 1 am until 5 am. At the last minute, however, M somehow gets out of working on Friday and goes down with another group of friends. Another friend said she might tag along at the last minute, but she opted out. I was flying solo. I wasn't too pleased about this, but I'd driven the route between Rochester and DC a few times now. I don't like going long distances alone because I'm paranoid of things going wrong (accident, breakdown, fatigue, etc.), but if I'm driving anywhere for more than a couple hours, DC is pretty good for me. I'm going. Oh, as an additional note, I had just gotten back from Venice the previous day, Thursday. I was somewhat afraid of jet lag effects making me too tired to drive, but when Friday came around, I felt OK. I was going to be too paranoid to fall asleep, anyway.

I got out of class, ran to my car, ducked back to my apt. to get the directions I had left on the printer (whoops) and I was off. Traffic was light, but the weather wasn't great. Rain was coming down pretty hard, and it seemed to get worse as I crossed I-90 to get into the heart of NY. When I got into PA, though, driving along US-15, the showers started to become more scattered and lighter. The rear windshield wiper on my 88 Corolla wagon wasn't working (I didn't have time to replace the motor with all the things I had to do to get ready for Venice, so oh well) and I couldn't see all that well out of the rear window. I substituted a combination of mirrors and prayer.

Driving along US-15 in PA isn't the best driving experience in the world. There are several points where it goes from a major divided highway to a main street through a small town, and a few points where you have to take an exit in order to stay on it. I was definitely glad I had driven it before. According to some signs, it's going to be turned into I-99 sometime in the future, but I have no idea when that will be. An uninterrupted interstate between Rochester an DC would make a happy camper. Anyway, as I was thinking these things, I was meandering out of Williamsport, and my reprieve with the weather looked like it was coming to an end. Just as the sun went down, I saw flashes of lightning in the hills not too far away. Lots of lightning. [censored]. I am not a happy camper. It was already starting to rain.

I checked the gas gauge. I was getting on to thinking about refilling, but it wasn't urgent. I could probably make it another 50-100 miles: Lewisburg-ish. It was about 8 PM, putting me a little shy of half way. And the rain was torrential. Lightning everywhere, and the superfast windshield wipers were only marginally effective. If I was anywhere near another car, I almost couldn't see at all from the spray coming up. I once mistakenly decided to pass a semi on this 2 lane highway and came too close to running into the median. That prayer was paying off, though. The terrain in this area is rolling. I'd climb a hill, and at the bottom, there'd be a big puddle waiting to hydroplane my car. Going the speed limit was just not an option.

I made it to Lewisburg about 9 pm, I definitely needed gas, and I was starving, having not eaten anything since lunch. The rain was even worse at this point. I think I saw a semi loading up a pair of giraffes and a pair of gazelles. I spotted a gas station for 2.59 on the left, the best I'd seen all trip, but I couldn't get there. I must have had to turn left before I saw it, because now there was no left turn to get there anywhere. Screw it. Rather than causing an accident turning around and such, I'll just catch the next one and pay an extra $0.49 or so.

Whoa. Well, the good news is that the rain just stopped cold about a half mile after I passed that gas station. It was still cloudy, but I could see. Phew. The bad news is that that gas station was pretty much the end of Lewisburg, and the gas light is now on. Well, surely one of the little towns along here will have a gas station.

Nope, not that one.

Not that one either.

Crap, that one is out of business.

This one is out of business too!

Aw [censored] hell, a third closed gas station? This is getting urgent. At least I'm going downhill.

Phew. I made it. $2.69 would be good enough. And it had a Subway, so I could finally eat something at 9:45. I got gas, got a sandwich, grabbed a Coke out of the cooler I had packed, and checked the map. Google's directions were a little weird and hard to read for the stretch between Harrisburg and DC. I couldn't follow them all on my AAA map, but they did get me around Harrisburg in a novel way using US-22 that was a lot easier than slogging through downtown on 15. I settled on a combination of Google's directions (I definitely needed them for the last little stretch to the dance hall I'd never been to before) and the route I knew, and I was back on the road.

The exit for 22 off of 15 was just a couple miles ahead, but, aw crap, did I take the wrong direction? Let me check the map -- yep, wro-SHIIIIIT!!!!

Some dumb truck was parked on the side of the road, but with its back corner still sticking out into the lane. I swerved around him because I didn't have time to stop after having been distracted by checking the directions. I have no idea what he was thinking, but I came way too close to hitting him. This is why I like having a navigator who can tell me I went the wrong way (or tell me not to go the wrong way) and I can devote 100% of my time to not hitting dumb trucks, rather than splitting it some with checking the map. At least I was at a place where I could stop for a minute, collect my wits, and then turn around.

The drive around Harrisburg was more pleasant than I was expecting having taken 22 instead of 15, but as I got onto I-81 to head into MD, I was unhappy again.

More [censored] lightning.

More torrential rain, more trouble seeing, more slow driving, more inability to pass cars w/o getting blinded. It started up just over the state line. What the hell is this? I guess I shouldn't have gone on this trip. Had I known all this would hit me on the drive, I wouldn't have gone. DC would be a blast, but it wasn't worth all these risks. But here I was, and it was better to make it to DC than to turn around at this point. At least this storm was shorter. It cleared up, oh, about 20 miles outside of DC.

Google's directions failed me as I got into DC, but it worked out OK. It failed to mention that I-270 split into I-495 (the beltway) before I reached my exit. Fortunately, I guessed correctly which branch I needed to take, so I'd reach my destination shortly. I was on Wisconsin, drove past the NIH, and then into the Chevy Chase area. Watching the building numbers, I knew I was close to the dance venue. Huh. There's a Tiffany & Co. store. While everyone hears about the ghettos, I guess this was the rich part of town. I was within a block or so based on the building numbers, so I decided to park in the spot I just saw and hoof it for the rest of the way. Who knows if I'll even be able to find any better parking.

I got out of the car, and I left my backpack, clothing bag, and such behind. I might still be far, and I could come back and get it. As I was looking for building numbers to figure out where I needed to go, I spied some black guy jaywalking over towards me. He was sporting cornrows, a black tshirt, and dark baggy jeans. I was the only person around, so he must be coming to me. He didn't look like a swing dancer, but who knows. Maybe he just wants to bum change, a smoke or something.

"You mumblemumblemumble?"

Huh? I have no idea what you just said, so I'll just put a dumb look on my face and stand here.

"Time?"

Oh, time. OK, let me check my wa--

*CRACK*

I was stumbling backwards, and I had no idea why. I didn't see anything. My right eye hurt, though. *Ptooey* I spat out a couple of white bits. Tooth? I sure hope that's a chipping and not a cracking or shattering. Did I just get punched in the face? Yeah, I think so. I was still walking backwards.

"Walk!"

Yes, I think I will. How did I chip a tooth when he punched me on the side of my right eye?

"Walk!"

That's what I'm doing. And I'm walking faster than you are doing your threatening gangsta strut. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm walking. "I don't want any trouble," I say to him over my shoulder.

"Walk!"

Is he going to ask me for my wallet? What do I do if he does? I don't know, but I'm going to keep walking.

"Walk!"

Thank God. It looks like he's stopping, AND there's a restaurant open across the street on the corner. I'm safe. I'm alive. My eye hurts like [censored] hell.

I walked into the restaurant, kind of a diner thing, and I asked the woman behind the counter for some ice. She didn't seem to get it, so I tried a little more urgently. Finally she got me a plastic cup of ice. I went to the bathroom to check myself out.

Yuck.

My eye was very swollen, partially swollen shut. It wasn't purple yet, but it was going to be. Looking in my mouth, I couldn't see any teeth missing or horribly damaged, so that was good. I could feel a rough edge on one of my right lower molars with my tongue. I chipped a lower tooth because of a blow to my eye? That punkass must have hit me pretty damn hard. I wasn't bleeding.

The ice in the cup wasn't very effective, but as I came out of the bathroom, I found a pitcher of water at a coffee cream/sugar/other crap table, and pouring that in the cup w/ the ice meant it would start working for me. I also recognized a couple in the restaurant. They were dancers. Must have been getting a bite to eat before hitting the late night dance. I recognized them because I'd danced with her (R) before, and I knew I'd seen him (M2) somewhere. I told them what had just happened, but then I was starting to feel like I was going to either pass out or puke. I needed to lie down for a bit, and I put my jacket under my legs.

After a few minutes of that, I was feeling much better. Or at least as much "better" as I could be feeling. I'm not exactly sure what I want to do now. After discussing things with M2 and R, we decide to get my things out of my car and head up to the dance. They'll have more ice, more comfortable seats, advil, I'll meet up with the other Rochester folk, and I'll get to find out whose house I'm sleeping at for the weekend. Sounded good to me. I put my jacket back on and plodded back towards my car with M2, R, and a cup of ice water on my eye.

Wait a minute. That's the guy! He just walked right past us going the other way. He didn't look at me, and I sure as hell didn't look at him. I whispered it to M2 and R as soon as he was past. I am now only thinking about getting my stuff and getting the hell out of there. I was relieved to see he hadn't broken into my car. But M2 is now walking after this guy? Where was he going?! Let's go, M2!

Apparently he was calling the cops. I guess that was a good plan, too. I didn't want to be seen by this guy, one, so he doesn't come after me again, and two, so he doesn't get suspicious. R decided to take me to her car around the corner. We saw the goon hail a cab, but for whatever God-blessed reason, the cabbie wouldn't take him. M2 is still on the phone. I go and sit in the car and wait for the cavalry to arrive.

A firetruck showed up first, just 2-3 minutes later. They gave my a cold pack to replace my cup of ice water and shine a light in my eye. They saw I don't need stitches or anything serious, but thought it might be a good idea to head to the hospital anyway. I wasn't so sure, and I wasn't enthusiastic about sitting in an ER until 3 am until I can get seen, told there's nothing they can really do for me, and then get sent on my way. I guess I'd see what the paramedics have to say. They show up next, a few minutes later. The guy I talk with sounds very much like he's saying that I shouldn't go to the hospital w/ him, but it's his job to not say so and to be willing to take me. I opt not to go, and I sign a form saying it's my own damn fault if I die because I didn't.

Finally the cops show up. And arrest the guy. Yes, he was STILL THERE! In spite of the fire truck AND the ambulence AND the cops, he was just casually sitting on the curb. M2 and R identify the guy to the cops as the guy I identified to them, but the cops never asked me to identify him. The cop did take down notes on my account as well as my contact info. I sure as hell hope I don't have to pay for a plane ticket back to DC or something to testify against this guy.

I also learned that this guy fit the description of a man who hit someone else at a hotel about 30 min earlier. While he didn't look drunk to me, it's pretty likely he was on a rampage induced by mental illness or some sort of drug. I'm glad he's off the street before he got anyone else.

Finally, everything wraps up w/ the officials. M2, R, and I head up to the dance. Naturally, I have to tell the story to everyone. At first, people think I'm just joking around, having made up an elaborate story to go with getting elbowed in the eye by a spinning girl or something. One girl got a picture of me, so I put on a frowny face for her.



The red spot on the side is where he got me. I did end up bleeding a little at that spot, but it was very minor, like, a drop. You can't see it very well, but there's blood that's turned the white of my eye red in the corner. That expanded to cover about half of the white of my eye (but not the iris) when I looked in the mirror the next morning.

The rest of the weekend turned out to be quite fun, and I did end up dancing quite a bit. That's mostly boring though, so I'll end the story here.

The end.

[slickpoppa]

way too many unnecessary details.

Honestly, do you really think anybody cares about stuff like this:

[ QUOTE ]
Phew. I made it. $2.69 would be good enough. And it had a Subway, so I could finally eat something at 9:45. I got gas, got a sandwich, grabbed a Coke out of the cooler I had packed, and checked the map. Google's directions were a little weird and hard to read for the stretch between Harrisburg and DC. I couldn't follow them all on my AAA map, but they did get me around Harrisburg in a novel way using US-22 that was a lot easier than slogging through downtown on 15. I settled on a combination of Google's directions (I definitely needed them for the last little stretch to the dance hall I'd never been to before) and the route I knew, and I was back on the road

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[miajag]

Cliff Notes:

1) MrWookie is a bad driver.

2) MrWookie got punched in the face for no reason by a black dude.

[cdxx]

dude, rain sucks, but the difficulty of the drive is overstated.

how you managed to get punched by a crazy person in the middle of chevy chase, i'll never know. the place is crawling with cop cars. that's like 1,000,000-to-1 bad beat.

[cold_cash]

[ QUOTE ]
Cliff Notes:

1) MrWookie is a bad driver.

2) MrWookie got punched in the face for no reason by a black dude.

[/ QUOTE ]

Did he punch him back?

[webmonarch]

Well, I wan't going to read the whole thing, but then I saw the picture, and I decided to.

I know exactly where you were in DC, and that is about the richest damn area in the country. But, as you saw, DC has its share of crazies running around.

The cops didn't ask you to identify him? WTF? That's not the right play.

[AZK]

Sorry about your bad trip, I know exactly where you were, it's not a bad part of town. As for the rest of the trip report, I couldn't help but think of Old School over and over again as I read each paragraph:

Mitch: Sorry, your seatbelt seems to be broken. What do you recommend I do?

Cab Driver: I recommend you stop being such a [censored]. You're in the backseat.

[d10]

[ QUOTE ]
how you managed to get punched by a crazy person in the middle of chevy chase, i'll never know. the place is crawling with cop cars. that's like 1,000,000-to-1 bad beat.

[/ QUOTE ]

[olliejen]

Wook,

Sorry to see this, hope ur feeling better.

--oj.

[KKbluff]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
how you managed to get punched by a crazy person in the middle of chevy chase, i'll never know. the place is crawling with cop cars. that's like 1,000,000-to-1 bad beat.

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]
wow..