I want to die

[jonwanchalk]

I got to play in my first live tournament today (I'm 17), $40 Buy In, top 5 got payed out of 58 people. I got to the final table with average chip stack (9 people.) 3 got out quick. 6 left. Some short stack is down to their last blind. She wins with A 2. Next hand, big stack calls two all ins with a flush and open ended straight draw. One short stack has a pair of eights, the even shorter stack had AA on their last blind (what are the fkn odds.) Of course no one hit, so the AA won, AA had to be like a 3:1 dog. I get JJ, raise 3xBB (most of my stack) behind me raises all in, I fold, they show AA. So I am down to nothing and am all in with 4 8 os against QQ. Flop was Q33. I get bubble. I have gotten bubble 12 times out of my last twenty tourneys with 1 cash for 2nd. No fkn lie. I walk out (obv upset) and wait for my dad. Now he's pissed cause I "embarrased him" even though I thought I handled it well. My life is a joke.
Also-I was not all in ONCE till the last hand, I NEVER caught when I called an all-in, and I folded JJx2 and QQ pre-flop twice and the other people had AA all three times. I didnt have KK or AA once.