All those donkeys and fish--they're idiots!

[Bad Lobster]

I've got a suggestion that would probably help at least 50% of the people on this forum, and that is to stop thinking of your opponents as idiots until you've determined conclusively that you're better than they are. I'm seeing an awful lot of posts here recently that describe absolutely terrible plays by the authors, and they tend to be full of contempt for their opponents for no apparent reason. Here's the general form:

Table is the usual collection of retards, escaped mental patients, and Bush appointees. UTG a totally passive fish, raises and donk next to him calls. I look down at 2[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]8[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img], raise to let them know I'm a tricky guy and call the waitress for another 7 & 7. Fish #3 calls...

Guess what, fool. You misspelled "Fish #4."

Try to take your table seriously whether you think they deserve your respect or not. It'll help your thinking process. As my great-grandlobster used to say, "We all used to be plankton once."

[mike l.]

*

[Sailboats]

ok

[private joker]

Lobster, I'm beginning to think that you're trolling this forum, and I'm not exactly sure why. Time and again you've entered threads to make ludicrous comments and terrible advice (don't raise AQ preflop, AKo OOP has massive PF equity after a raise and several cold-callers, etc.), seemingly trying to find the worst play in any situation and then arguing in favor of it. Now you make a new thread to insult the vast majority of winning players here (I can tell you're referring to HOWMANY, mike l., and DeathDonkey, etc. due to the writing style) with a pointless rant that assumes people are doing stuff like raising 82o.

There's some merit in your suggestion to give credit to unknowns, since more harm is done when we underrate players as opposed to overrating them, but until you've made some valid arguments for the wacky plays you endorse in the hand threads, I don't think the community is going to take you seriously. Please read the sticky again regarding the kind of positive discussion we like to have in MSLHE. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that you, like the rest of us, are trying to improve each other's game. The way to do that is by making sound arguments for reasoned opinions... not by calling great players fools and fish.

Thanks for understanding and good luck.

-joker

[HOWMANY]

His posts always bring a smile to my face, usually followed by uncontrollable laughter at his expense.

I do exactly what you suggest Bad Lobster. Here is the checklist that I go through each time I play to confirm I am the best player at the table. I ask myself the following questions:

1. Is Mike L at the table?
2. Is surfdoc at the table?
3. Is Joe Tall at the table?
4. Is Ben H at the table?

If the answer to these questions is no, I am the best player at the table. It's really not that complicated.

Bad Lobster sounds pretty bitter. I think he might be the guy that I got "lucky" against in like 2 pots last night at which point he went into 100% vpip check/call no matter what tilt. It worked so well for him that I took all of his money even faster than the money of the player who was originally the real fish in the 3 handed game.

[surfdoc]

as i sit here posting from my friends cell while losing back all of my win in the forty playing four the only thing i can think of is how glad i am that i dont know the last dude so i get to save all that time by having a shorter checklist

[rafiki]

I'm using "mongoloid" a lot more over fish. And like the movie grindhouse suggests, I try to eat their brains to gain their knowledge. I find I'm improving a lot, despite fish knowledge being very limited.

[PokerBob]

ban this jackass.