18 years old and never even kissed a girl!! :-( --LONG--

[cherrygarcia]

Don´t really know how to explain why I have never kissed a girl, I realise it is so strange for a straight guy my age, but I´ll give it a shot.

I didn´t think too much about girls until I was about 13 or something. Rightfully I should have kissed a girl when I was about 11 but I didn´t know what to do, didn´t really feel any desire to try at that age, and was (and still am) a total wimp.

So that was my first chance to get anywhere near a girl that I blew, at the ripe old age of 11. The next girl that I remember was another one I was friends with until the age of 14 or so. She liked me, but she was not good looking at all and I had a crush at the time on some other girl, though as you can imagine nothing ever happened there.

I might mention at this stage that although I was 14 I was very short, chubby and looked a lot younger than my age. Even now most people think I look younger than 18.

I never had a big group of friends and most of them were nerdy, into videogames and we never seemed to talk about girls at all. As you can imagine, we were all unpopular with the girls and going to an all boys school meant that ´hanging out´ was usually an all-male affair.

The next girl that I remember was when I was 15. Again we talked a lot and became really good friends and I liked her, but she looked 19 or so at the time (she was my age) and I felt like a 12 year old. She flirted a bit with me for a few months, hung out with me all the time, but she would tell me stories about boyfriends she had had in the past and her experience again scared me to the point where I didn´t do anything, I was placed in the friend zone and she got a boyfriend and is still with him as far as I know.

When I was 16, a girl who I had known all my life but who I had thought never liked me, started sending me txts and then I got a call off one of her friends asking me would I meet up with her. This girl had plenty of ties with my parents and some friends of mine and at this stage I was already concerned with my inexperience with girls and also I had nothing in common with her.

Around this time I must have learnt to play poker, and this consumed me for a long time. I still play a lot and read a lot although I am probably not as hooked as I was when I started. When you tend to be antisocial, poker can really mess you up, and the more time went by, the smaller my circle of friends became. This meant even less girls to talk to, and even less chances of anything happening.

When I was 17, I met another girl who really liked me from the start. She was very nice, not bad looking and when we got drunk she threw herself at me. By now, I had been obsessing about my inexperience for so long and I had lied to all my friends making up stories about girls I had made out with. She was certain that I had made out before and so I was afraid that if I kissed her, she would realise it was my first time (I might make some typical first timers mistakes or something, I don´t know) and she would be shocked. Word might spread, and I didn´t want to face that embarrassment. A few more times when the group would go out she tried it on with me. The last time that she did, she even commented in her drunken state:"it´s not that I think you´re gay..." and left it at that, never finishing the sentence.

Since then, I have been playing poker, keeping busy, doing all male stuff with my group of friends which is by now almost exclusively male, but as the months pass it´s not getting any easier.

I have always been shy, introverted and had mild intimacy/closeness issues. I don´t feel very comfortable touching or getting touched. I feel that I am still in time to change these things if I start up relationships. It may be very late, but it´s only a couple of years later than "normal late". I already feel and know that I´ve missed out on the whole teenage dating thing, which is depressing but best not to dwell on the past too much..

I might aswell mention that I lost weight, started doing weights at the gym and am now in the best physical shape I have ever been. Also, I am probably an above average looking guy and when people get to know me they usually like me and I am generally nice enough and considerate enough, but I am terrible with first impressions.

What I´m saying is that right now I am a healthy 18 year old guy with a normal life except when it comes to relationships. I lead a normal student life, and almost every one of my friends has had sex and all of them have made out with girls. They think that I have too, and nowadays when they want to make out or try and get laid they all go out. They are beginning to wonder if I´m gay I think, because they see that I have never made out with any girl at a nightclub.

But for me it´s very tough. I am nothing special in the looks department and I have ZERO game. I already mentioned that I´m not a great guy for first impressions. I don´t have much charisma, my sense of humour is pretty dark and subtle. I have no chatup lines, get very nervous when around any girl that I feel any attraction towards, etc. More than anything though, I´VE NEVER EVEN KISSED A GIRL!

So, OOT, how do I get my first kiss without everyone I know finding out that I am legally an adult and havent even had a kiss on the mouth? I don´t have many girls that are friends at the moment and those that I do know have securely placed me in the "friend zone" a long time ago, so my best chance would be at a nightclub. I´m not going to find any girl who is in the same situation as me there, but what are my other options?

Please help...I´m in full-blown desperation mode right now!


p.s. as you can see this is my first post, and yes this is a gimmick account but I am not a regular poster, with only about two hundred posts over the space of a year. i only set up a new account because i didnt want others searching my previous posts under my real account.

[Kneel B4 Zod]

at least you know you don't have the herp

[TomCollins]

This answer is simple:

Are you gross and digsgusting?

Yes- hang out with Bruiser and have him get you some nasty prostitutes

No- hang around with a lot of drunk girls

[BillNye]

wow cant believe u messed up on age 17, if she is drunk she will most likely not beable to notice how bad u suck.

Also age 16 seems pretty sure fire too.

Forget about the negatives tho

Why dont u just go to a social place (18+ club, party or w/e u can find) and force urself to talk, dance, w/e w/ X amount of chicks?

Don't aim to high or u will get denied and have ur low self esteem prob crushed some more.

I'm guessing if u get positive feedback from one decent chick ur self esteem will sky rocket.

[esad]

Stop worrying about it. Pretend that you have and then fake it. NOBODY CARES. Seriously. At worse some random skank is going to think you are a bad kisser. And????

Good god, you need mental help or a ban.

[RichC.]

dude, this is a minor thing to be sweating about, I think I was 18 or 19 myself when I first kissed a girl. Some people are just late bloomers. Before you know it you will pimping chicks on the corner and busting knee caps when old men dont pay up.

[MediaPA]

Find girl - any girl will do - and kiss her. It will go very badly. She'll let you try again if she likes you at all (or drunk) and hopefully it will get better.

Two first time kissers = disaster. One is bad enough.

[Fedorfan]

[popeye18]

I didnt read your entire post but skimmed it. I think the longer you wait the harder its gonna be and then the weirder it will get. Get some drinks in you and get in the right position with a girl you dont really like(if your really into her youll be too nervous) and just get it over with.

[tuq]

cherrygarcia
stranger
Reged: 04/02/07
Posts: 1