LMAO 100NL IS FOR MONKEYS

grando · #1 12-21-2006, 04:32 AM

SERIOUSLY PEOPLE HAND YOU MONEY:

OPEN PUSH TWICE IN A ROW YOU GET CALLED BY 88

No Limit Holdem Ring game
Blinds: $0.50/$1
5 players
Converter

Stack sizes:
UTG: $40.50
CO: $137.90
Button: $166.90
Hero: $99.00
BB: $111.20

Pre-flop: (5 players) Hero is SB with 8[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] 8[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]
2 folds, Button raises to $40, Hero raises all-in $98.5, BB folds, Button calls.

Flop: 2[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] 2[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] 3[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] ($198, 1 player + 1 all-in - Main pot: $198)

Turn: 6[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] ($198, 1 player + 1 all-in - Main pot: $198)

River: 7[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] ($198, 1 player + 1 all-in - Main pot: $198)

Results:
Final pot: $198
Hero shows 8D 8C 
Button shows 4S KC 

AGAIN?!? I WILL OWN YOU - WAIT A SECOND....

No Limit Holdem Ring game
Blinds: $0.50/$1
5 players
Converter

Stack sizes:
Hero: $197.00
CO: $109.70
Button: $39.00
SB: $133.40
BB: $74.00

Pre-flop: (5 players) Hero is UTG with A[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]
Hero calls, CO folds, Button calls, SB calls, BB raises all-in $73, Hero calls, 2 folds.

Flop: 7[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] T[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] 6[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] ($148, 1 player + 1 all-in - Main pot: $148)

Turn: J[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] ($148, 1 player + 1 all-in - Main pot: $148)

River: 8[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] ($148, 1 player + 1 all-in - Main pot: $148)

Results:
Final pot: $148
BB shows 3H 9C 
Hero shows AS KC 

RIVER BROUGHT EVERY DRAW IN?!?!? OH NOES ARRRRR IN VALUETOWN

No Limit Holdem Ring game
Blinds: $0.50/$1
5 players
Converter

Stack sizes:
UTG: $160.65
CO: $79.00
Hero: $174.50
SB: $315.20
BB: $355.65

Pre-flop: (5 players) Hero is Button with A[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] A[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]
UTG calls, CO calls, Hero raises to $7, 2 folds, UTG calls, CO calls.

Flop: 3[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] 2[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] J[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] ($22.5, 3 players)
UTG bets $1, CO folds, Hero raises to $22, UTG calls.

Turn: 4[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] ($66.5, 2 players)
UTG checks, Hero bets $55, UTG calls.

River: A[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] ($176.5, 2 players)
UTG checks, Hero is all-in $90.5, UTG calls all-in $76.65.
Uncalled bets: $13.85 returned to Hero.

Results:
Final pot: $329.8
Hero shows AS AH 
UTG shows QC AD 

WHAT AJ NO GOOD?!? I'LL INSTACALL EVERY STREET ANYWAYS LOL $$$$

No Limit Holdem Ring game
Blinds: $0.50/$1
5 players
Converter

Stack sizes:
UTG: $21.25
Hero: $234.80
Button: $78.10
SB: $152.80
BB: $25.00

Pre-flop: (5 players) Hero is CO with Q[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] A[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img]
UTG (poster) checks, Hero raises to $5, Button folds, SB calls, BB folds, UTG calls.

Flop: Q[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] 3[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] A[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] ($16, 3 players)
SB checks, UTG checks, Hero bets $14, SB calls, UTG folds.

Turn: 6[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] ($44, 2 players)
SB checks, Hero bets $33, SB calls.

River: 4[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] ($110, 2 players)
SB checks, Hero is all-in $182.8, SB calls all-in $100.8.
Uncalled bets: $82 returned to Hero.

Results:
Final pot: $311.6
Hero shows QH AD 
SB shows JH AH 

VALUETOWN FEATURING ME AS THE ONE EXTRACTING VALUE AND YOU AS THE TOWN WHORE GOBBLING KNOB FOR BUS FARE

No Limit Holdem Ring game
Blinds: $0.50/$1
5 players
Converter

Stack sizes:
UTG: $48.50
CO: $109.25
Button: $80.05
Hero: $101.50
BB: $12.65

Pre-flop: (5 players) Hero is SB with Q[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] Q[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]
UTG raises to $3, CO folds, Button calls, Hero raises to $14, 2 folds, Button calls.

Flop: 9[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] 8[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] Q[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] ($32, 2 players)
Hero bets $22, Button calls.

Turn: T[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] ($76, 2 players)
Hero checks, Button checks.

River: 6[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] ($76, 2 players)
Hero is all-in $65, Button calls all-in $43.55.
Uncalled bets: $21.45 returned to Hero.

Results:
Final pot: $163.1
Hero shows QD QS 
Button shows KC10S 

I KNOW HERO DOESN'T 3 BARREL EVER BUT I WILL CALL WITH MY OVERPAIR ANYWAYS CAUSE IT'S THE NUTZ

No Limit Holdem Ring game
Blinds: $0.50/$1
5 players
Converter

Stack sizes:
UTG: $161.05
Hero: $100.00
Button: $10.90
SB: $44.10
BB: $102.50

Pre-flop: (5 players) Hero is CO with A[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] A[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]
UTG calls, Hero raises to $5, 2 folds, BB calls, UTG folds.

Flop: 6[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] 7[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] 6[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] ($11.5, 2 players)
BB checks, Hero bets $9, BB calls.

Turn: 4[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] ($29.5, 2 players)
BB checks, Hero bets $22, BB calls.

River: K[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] ($73.5, 2 players)
BB checks, Hero is all-in $64, BB calls.

Results:
Final pot: $201.5
Hero shows AD AC 
BB shows JH JD 

NOTE: VILLAIN WILL 3BET OVER MINRAISES LIGHT - OH WAIT HE CALLED HE MUST HAVE A HAND ARRRRR IN
NOTE 2: HATES MONEY

No Limit Holdem Ring game
Blinds: $0.50/$1
5 players
Converter

Stack sizes:
UTG: $186.65
CO: $40.30
Button: $481.30
SB: $109.00
Hero: $98.50

Pre-flop: (5 players) Hero is BB with 9[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] 9[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]
UTG raises to $4, CO folds, Button calls, SB folds, Hero calls.

Flop: 9[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] 5[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] 9[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] ($12.5, 3 players)
Hero checks, UTG checks, Button bets $5, Hero calls, UTG calls.

Turn: 7[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] ($27.5, 3 players)
Hero checks, UTG checks, Button bets $8, Hero raises to $16, UTG folds, Button calls.

River: 7[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] ($59.5, 2 players)
Hero is all-in $73.5, Button calls.

Results:
Final pot: $206.5
Hero shows 9C 9S 
Button shows QD QS 

A SAMSUNG 204B HAS JUST BEEN ORDERED THANKS TO THESE HEROES - MY 204T WANTS SOMETHING BETTER THAN A SYNCMASTER 755DF WHATEVER THE HELL THAT IS - PROBABLY THE YEAR IT WAS MADE

akishore · #2 12-21-2006, 04:40 AM

awesome. nhs.

FreakSex · #3 12-21-2006, 04:52 AM

I can almost hear the doomswitch being pulled.

grando · #4 12-21-2006, 05:03 AM

[ QUOTE ]
I can almost hear the doomswitch being pulled.

[/ QUOTE ]

it didn't work the first 4 graphs and sets of hands I posted - it better not start now

evank15 · #5 12-21-2006, 05:07 AM

you run good sir.

i hate you.

Black winter day · #6 12-21-2006, 05:07 AM

Hero checks, UTG checks, Button bets $8, Hero raises to $16

For monkeys, you say?

ChexNFX · #7 12-21-2006, 05:09 AM

[ QUOTE ]
I can almost hear the doomswitch being pulled.

[/ QUOTE ]

grando · #8 12-21-2006, 05:10 AM

[ QUOTE ]
Hero checks, UTG checks, Button bets $8, Hero raises to $16

For monkeys, you say?

[/ QUOTE ]

I had absolutely no idea how to play flopped top quads

JP OSU · #9 12-21-2006, 06:03 AM

as opposed to the standard bottom quads play...

Corpsebean · #10 12-21-2006, 06:04 AM

Racist.