Preparing for the transition to B&M play

Wongboy · #1 10-04-2006, 11:40 PM

For obvious reasons, I am thinking that I might need to transition to B&M play in the future. I am developing a plan to prepare for B&M play. Here is what I have so far. Comments appreciated:

1. Find the slowest, loosest site on the internet that also has an obscenely high rake.

2. Play one table at a time, with no HUDs.

3. Light 20 cigarettes and place them in front of a fan that is blowing straight into my face.

4. Hire the old grumpy guy down the street to sit next to me and complain that everything I do is against the rules, and yell for a "set-up" every 2.3 minutes.

5. Get my 12 year old retarded neighbor to sit next to me and have a conversation with him about religion or politics.

6. Take a piss on a deck of cards, and soak some chips in crap, then shuffle the cards and chips while I am playing.

7. Have my wife walk by and pretend that she doesn't hear me when I ask for a drink.

I think that pretty much covers all the bases. Did I miss anything?

Kneel B4 Zod · #2 10-04-2006, 11:43 PM

buy a dealers handbook

JrJordan · #3 10-04-2006, 11:45 PM

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5. Get my 12 year old retarded neighbor to sit next to me and have a conversation with him about religion or politics.

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I laughed at this one.

Texibus · #4 10-04-2006, 11:46 PM

I got good news big guy. Almost all poker rooms in casinos now are smoke free or have a smoke free section. I think it's been this way for awhile so you can skip the cigs.

Wongboy · #5 10-04-2006, 11:56 PM

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I got good news big guy. Almost all poker rooms in casinos now are smoke free or have a smoke free section. I think it's been this way for awhile so you can skip the cigs.

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Good point. This is the case in my local room. I'll just move the cigs and fan to my front door and walk through it before and after each session.

I Gotta Push · #6 10-05-2006, 08:31 PM

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Good point. This is the case in my local room. I'll just move the cigs and fan to my front door and walk through it before and after each session.

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Your wit is truly legendary.

Howling · #7 10-04-2006, 11:58 PM

and while you might not get a drink, whens the last time you actually had a shot to bed the waitress?

Wongboy · #8 10-05-2006, 12:12 AM

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and while you might not get a drink, whens the last time you actually had a shot to bed the waitress?

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You misread my post. I said WIFE, not girlfriend.

Howling · #9 10-05-2006, 12:13 AM

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and while you might not get a drink, whens the last time you actually had a shot to bed the waitress?

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You misread my post. I said WIFE, not girlfriend.

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yes, hence the word 'shot' [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

Synergistic Explosions · #10 10-05-2006, 12:17 AM

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and while you might not get a drink, whens the last time you actually had a shot to bed the waitress?

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How many have you bedded? Where are the best sites to play to bed waitresses?

When you desire to bed a waitress, do you ask her upfront for a bedding? Or are there code words, like, "hey baby, wanna toss my pillows?".

I'm very interested in knowing more about bedding waitresses at the poker rooms.

TIA