Best L.A. Song

[suzzer99]

So I'm driving to work this morning listening to some cheesey song by System of a Down (imagine) about "all the maggots smoking fags down on Hollywood Boulevard". Not the most annoying song by them ever. Then they get really crazy talking about "phony people". Phoney people - in LA. Wow, that's a good one. Subtle and sublime as always. Run with it guys.

Anyway this all got me thinking about the "Best L.A. Song ever". Here's my nomination, with the parts I really like in <font color="blue"> blue </font>:

Soul Coughing - Screenwriter's Blues

Exits to freeways
twisted like knots on
fingers.
Jewels cleaving
skin between
breasts.

Your Cadillac breathes
four hundred horses over blue lines.
<font color="blue">You are going to Reseda
to make love to a model from Ohio
whose real name you don't know.</font>

You spin
like the cadillac was overturning down a cliff
on television.
And the radio is on
and the radioman is speaking
and the radioman says
women were a curse.
So men built Paramount
studios.
And men built Columbia
studios.
And men built
Los Angeles.

It is 5 am
and you are listening
to Los Angeles.

And the radioman says
it is a beautiful night out there!
And the radioman says
Rock and Roll lives!
And the radioman says
it is a beautiful night out there
in Los Angeles.
You live
in Los Angeles
and you are going
to Reseda; <font color="blue">we are all in some way or another
going to Reseda
someday
to die.
And the radioman laughs
because the radioman [censored] a model too.</font>

<font color="blue">Gone savage
for teenagers with
automatic weapons and boundless love.
Gone savage for
teenagers who are
aesthetically pleasing,
in other words,
fly.</font>
Los Angeles beckons
the teenagers
to come to her on buses;
<font color="blue">Los Angeles loves
love.</font>

It is 5 am
and you are listening
to Los Angeles.

I am going to
Los Angeles
to build a screenplay about
lovers who murder each other.
I am going to
Los Angeles
to see my own name on a
screen, five feet long and luminous.
As the radioman says
it is 5AM
and the sun has charred the other side of the world
and come back to us
and painted the smoke
over our heads
an imperial violet.

It is 5 am
and you are listening
to Los Angeles.

You are listening...
You are listening...
You are listening...
You are listening...

...to Los Angeles.

[suzzer99]

Dammit, I'm going to start writing my posts then having El Diablo post them. [img]/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img] We'll just have a byline "posted on behalf of suzzer, so someone will actually pay attention".

[samjjones]

I'm old school, so I'll say "I Love L.A." by Randy Newman. Made immortal by its appearance in "The Naked Gun".

[protocol]

California Love

[jaydub]

suzzer,

You whine like a little punk. But here's a response:

Some say the end is near
Some say we'll see armageddon soon
I certainly hope we will
I sure could use a vacation from this
[censored] three ring circus sideshow...
Of freaks here in this hopeless [censored] hole we call LA
The only way to fix it is to flush it all away
Any [censored] time, any [censored] day
Learn to swim, I'll see you down in Arizona bay

Fret for your figure and
Fret for your latte and
Fret for your hairpiece and
Fret for your lawsuit and
Fret for your prozac and
Fret for your pilot and
Fret for your contract and
Fret for your car

It's a [censored] three ring circus sideshow...
Of freaks here in this hopeless [censored] hole we call LA
The only way to fix it is to flush it all away
Any [censored] time, any [censored] day
Learn to swim, I'll see you down in Arizona bay
Some say a comet will fall from the sky
Followed by meteor showers and tidal waves
Followed by faultlines that cannot sit still
Followed by millions of dumbfounded dipshits.
Some say the end is near
Some say we'll see armageddon soon
I certainly hope we will cuz
I sure could use a vacation from this
Silly [censored], stupid [censored]...
One great big festering neon distraction,
I've a suggestion to keep you all occupied
Learn to swim

Mom's gonna fix it all soon
Mom's comin' round to put it back the way it ought to be
Learn to swim
[censored] L Ron Hubbard and
[censored] all his clones
[censored] all those gun-toting
Hip gangster wannabes
Learn to swim
[censored] retro anything
[censored] your tattoos
[censored] all you junkies and
[censored] your short memory
Learn to swim
[censored] smiley glad-hands
With hidden agendas
[censored] these dysfunctional,
Insecure actresses
Learn to swim

Cuz I'm praying for rain
And I'm praying for tidal waves
I wanna see the ground give way
I wanna watch it all go down
Mom please flush it all away
I wanna watch it go right in and down
I wanna watch it go right in
Watch you flush it all away
Time to bring it down again
Don't just call me pessimist
Try and read between the lines
I can't imagine why you wouldn't
Welcome any change, my friend
I wanna see it all come down
Suck it down
Flush it down

[Yeti]

[ QUOTE ]
Dammit, I'm going to start writing my posts then having El Diablo post them. [img]/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img] We'll just have a byline "posted on behalf of suzzer, so someone will actually pay attention".

[/ QUOTE ]

OK, here's a tip.

Posts (or threads that provoke them) consisting of lyrics to a full song suck. Bad. They are possibly the worst posts made on OOT. No-one will f'ing read through the whole post. They will either think 'haha i know that song', or 'wtf song is this, why is he pasting all these lyrics?!?'

To summarise, this was a bad idea for a thread.

[drewjustdrew]

I consider Boys of Summer an LA song, but not sure if it is. Otherwise, that Dogs Eye View (Everclear?) song Santa Monica, or that Sheryl Crowe song are good considerations. sam already took my top pick.

[suzzer99]

I agree about posting entire song lyrics. So I figured people would just skim to the blue parts. But if they wanted to read the whole lyrics they could. I really thought I had a made a technical breakthrough here. But I guess not.

Just trying to contribute. And the El Diablo thing was just a bump/joke from what they were saying on the "Dinner" thread.

[jason_t]

Link.

[suzzer99]

Cool, had a feeling.