why did i do this again?

No_Foolin'? · #1 05-13-2006, 11:22 PM

winning poker sucks ass, it is boring as hell

do NOT deviate from what you know you're supposed to do. You will only regret it. Yeah, all the cool kids are doing it, but if all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you? All right. Of course you would, but that's not my point.

My point is this: Do NOT deviate from what you know is correct. All that time you've spent studying and reading about poker actually DOES amount to something: do NOT pretend you know better than - gag - Mason Malmuth or David Skalnsky. Yes, these guys are a-wpies and you'd NEVER want to be friends with them. But, you know what? They speak the truth.

No matter HOW MUCH you want them to be wrong and you want poker, therefore, to be ANYTHING else besides the boring, mundane, pain in the ass, follow-the-rules endeavor that it is, you MUST cease and desist from your wayward notions.

Poker is NOT glamourous. Poker is NOT even mf any fun. It is an occupation like any other, filled with routine, severe monotony, and rote behaviors. It is, ultimately, a pain in the ass and not-what-you'd- hoped-it-would-be. Why? Because if for some reason you become inspired, and start to think you can be crative and outwit EV and probabilty, you are in for a rude awakening.

You see, THIS is what I sometimes prefer to believe. And every single MF time I get [censored] in the ass for believing this. I think I can outwit the odds and the probability. I think I can outplay my opponents. Well, yes, I CAN outplay them, but ONLY if I'm willing to play correctly, as it unfortunately turns out.

Secretly, I HATE this flippin' game. I'd rather be in Maui, thank you very much. But it pays the flippin' bills, this sitting on my ass in front of the computer for hours and hours at a time. Is this at all natural? [censored] no. This is BS. But we gotta do what we gotta do, right? And we have to endure the hours and hours with little-to-no-progress and the sometimes-bad-run-of-cards.

So, my point is this: no matter how tempted you might become - through sheer boredom and perhaps frustration - to pretend you can bend the rules and beat the game using strategies that differ from what is taught by the experts - do NOT delude yourself. You MUST sit there and take the bad beats, and take the folding hand after hand after mf hand. This is your mf job and that's all it is. It will get you by and that's all, really, it is good for.

These mf's don't give a rat's ass that you are patient enough to wait for a good hand to play. They'll call your pf raise with garbage, and be perfectly content to call you down and beat you with a 3-outer on the river. They could care less and they could realize less. Welcome to the life of a professional online poker player. Sit for hours and hours and hours at a time by yourself wishing to God above that you could just score a HUGE day or some HUGE insight and therefore be done with the toil, but all the while realizing, deep down, that mother-[censored] Sklansky, Malmuth, and Miller are right. And therefore, you gottta sit there, hand after mf hand, waiting for a good one to play. And then hoping that these MF call stations won't beat the [censored] out of you, or that God himself won't see fit at this moment to simply and outright [censored] YOU OVER.

Am I bitter? Why, what gave you THAT idea? I'm trying my MF damndest to earn some MF money playing this God-forsaken game and day after MF day I get [censored] over because I choose to follow the directives of Sklansky, Malmuth, and Miller. When, oh MF when, will all this MF ev come home to roost?

I've tried pre-empting the arrival of this EV by loosening up and attempting to outplay my opponnets on any given hand. Sure, it'll work maybe for a short while. But over time you will simply drive yourself into the ground trying to outwit the deck. It CANNOT happen. You CANNOT outplay your lame-ass opponents. All you can do is sit and wait for what you think is a decent hand, put your money in, and hope to God you're the last one standing. It is ALL MATH....MF God-forsaken math, this limit poker.

Poker was created in Hell. It is a barren endeavor devoid of emotion or anything resembling humanity. It is pure calculation and therefore a product of the mind and nothing else. Is it profitable? Yes, usually. Is it a product of all that is good in the world? MF hardly. This is my .02 for the day and I apologize for being so MF bitter about something wihich is supposed to be so MF great. I hope I can look back on this entry and laugh. Right now, however, I want to kick MF Jesus in the MF groin.