Probably a common enough problem, wanted to get some input

[whoisthedrizzle]

Hi all,

I think this post might get long and is probably not incredibly interesting, so thank you if you read it and I won't take offense if you stop in a few lines.

I've been playing poker sort of seriously for a couple months now, I've moved up from the tiniest limits (like nl2) to nl50 (6 max). I haven't played so many hands in that time span, probably in the neighborhood of 80,000 or so spread over 5 months. Alright so ever since coming to nl50 I've been unable to beat the game. I suppose you could say I haven't played enough hands to know if I'm actually losing, but I feel like I'm being outplayed often (or at least that too often I face decisions that are difficult for me even though I feel like after 80,000 hands they should no longer be). I've also been told by a couple 2p2ers who know how I play, talk with me often, that I'm pretty bad overall, way too weak tight and generally just a poor player both preflop and postflop (fwiw I agree with them). The fact that I've been unable to win has been very depressing to me, I have little confidence in my game and for the first time in a while do not feel like I'm improving at all. Is it possible I'm just not smart enough to win at poker no matter what I do?

I believe part of my problem is that 50 dollars seems like a lot of money to me, much more than losing 25 bucks at 25nl was. I'm properly rolled for the game so that isn't the problem, but I'm not exactly sure how to get to the point where I can play well and not think about the money involved (I can't even begin to fathom how the high limit players can lose several hundred thousand in a session when I think about all that that money can buy).

Another of my problems is that when I get on 2p2 I tend to drift towards the off topic forums, BBV and BBV4L (if you search my post history you'll see well over 90% of my posts are in BBV4L). I dunno if I'm the only one with this problem, but I'm thinking it would be best to just completely stop reading this forum (If only I had that kind of will power). I just end up wasting so much of my time on 2p2 reading the pointless stuff when I know I should be reading strat or paying more attention at the tables.

Alright so I apologize for this post, it's probably not that well thought out and maybe not even all that an uncommon predicament for beginning players, but I felt like writing a few things down and maybe getting some useful advice on how to push forward. I might just be done with 2p2 after this thread, I'm not really sure at this point, but a friend recommended that I post my feelings here before altogether giving up. If I think of something to add I'll probably post them later in thread (assuming anyone at all replies).

Thanks for your input, feel free to tell me how I suck, how 50 bucks isn't a lot of money, how you're a lot smarter and better at poker than me, how I'm being really over emotional and probably need clinical help to deal with my attitude, all of these things are probably at least somewhat true.