Need Advice? Ask this guy!

[ianisakson]

Ok BBV4evar, my buddy just started writing an advice column for our student newspaper. He has an "interesting" way of giving people advice in a very blunt way. Read his advice, it is very funny and if you have anything to ask him give it a shot.


http://badgerherald.com/artsetc/2007...tch_out_bi.php

[theAMOG]

why does conspire smoke the pole?

[ianisakson]

[ QUOTE ]
why does conspire smoke the pole?

[/ QUOTE ]

cause he's addickted

[React1oN]

Why did the break dancer kick the [censored] out of the little girl

[ianisakson]

[ QUOTE ]
Why did the break dancer kick the [censored] out of the little girl

[/ QUOTE ]

what, you've never kicked a little girl before?

BAN

[LiveNow]

i bel air rolled him.

[Andy.713]

[ QUOTE ]
i bel air rolled him.

[/ QUOTE ]

I saw that and laughed.

[ianisakson]

hey anthony,

I'm having this issue with this chick at the video store. She's always giving me 'tude and [censored] just 'cause i avoid paying fines. One day when i said i didn't have enough, she said that enough was enough, she wasn't going to give me the video until i payed the fine.

I was like, bitch ever heard of the interweb? she said she had (i dont really believe it but w/e). I said if she wanted, she could come to my place to watch the movie and collect the fine. She accepted. . I whistled for a cab and when it came we drove to my crib to watch the movie. The cab was fresh and had a dice in the mirror.

If anything I could say that this cab was rare but I thought now forget it, yo home to bel-air

I pulled up to a house about seven or eight
And I yelled to the cabby yo, home smell you later. Looked at my kingdom I was finally there. To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air

Prince

[LiveNow]

[ QUOTE ]
Dear sir,

You have just wasted 4 minutes of my life. 2 of those were spent punching myself in the stomach for reading this. Your ramshackle, pointless, half-assed, "[censored] you" attempt at humor would make even Carlos Mencia say, "Ok, now that's just childish."

There is a light at the end of the tunnel, however, as columns like this may be used as some sort of delightful form of torture by our government. Waterboarding, move on over: terrorists will tell you anything they know once they are subjected to your comedic masturbation.

If I wasn't so sure that nobody else reads this garbage, I would feel the need to stand in library mall with a megaphone, offering lobotomies to anyone who had dared to "Ask Anthony," read Anthony or regard Anthony as anything less than an extremely vulgar shock-comedy parrot. (and with worse fashion sense, might I add.)

Arts just started looking good, and you had to drag it back down by soiling it, dragging your ass all over this page. You, sir, rank alongside the editors of the Mendota Beacon as the leaders in defecation art - you've helped create the most text-heavy toilet paper on campus. Kudos.

Anyway, good luck with St. Peter. I hear he's a real stickler for douchebags.

[/ QUOTE ]

tl;dr

edit: lol princerolled!