Common things you've never done in your life

[Rushmore]

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Autofellatio

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Me either, unless you count dreams. I've tried, but I'd need either a much longer member or a much more flexible spine to accomplish it.

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This reminds me of the Steve Martin line from L.A. Story:

"I could never be a woman, 'cause I'd just stay home and play with my breasts all day."