Stupid things you believed as a child

[kkcountry]

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That the dog went to a nice farm to live.

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When I was 5 or so, I went to my grandparents with my mom memorial day weekend, my dad and dog stayed behind. When I came back, the dog was gone to a farm, where she could run free all day. I wonder when my parents are going to come clean on that one?

[IlliniLou]

i thought that people were buried at the exact spot they died. and always thought why would people go to a cemetary if there was such a high chance of dying there.

[skitzo444]

Once I swallowed a watermelon seed and was scared shitless because I KNEW a watermelon was going to grow in my stomach.

Same thing for sunflower seeds.

[FocusedOne]

Until I was in middle school I always assumed that Delaware was a massive, massive useless state out west like Nebraska or something. When I realized where it was and how small it blew my mind.

[stormstarter28]

I didn't want to be a Quarterback because I was afraid I wouldn't have anything significant to talk about in the huddle.

[ClevelandWasp]

When I was three or four and first became aware of football, I thought the Pittsburgh team was the "Stealers", as in they stole things. This made perfect sense because they wore black and everyone I knew hated them.

[jba]

my older brother has the same middle name as my paternal grandfather (and my father). I have the same middle name as my maternal grandfather.

Both of my grandfathers happen to go by their middle names. I concluded that when you get old you switched to your middle name. I was amazed that my grandmothers never slipped up and called them by their first names again after all those years, and knew for a fact my mother would always mess up when my dad got old.

[john voight]

would eventually lose my virginity

[BobbyArmani]

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Edit: Also, convinced I was living in some sort of Truman Show-like game where I am the only real person.

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According to quantum mechanics, this is so!

[KotOD]

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I didn't want to be a Quarterback because I was afraid I wouldn't have anything significant to talk about in the huddle.

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This sounds like a Woody Allen joke.