girlfriend being harassed, what to do?

[Hollywade]

What a perfect thread!

I just got done dealing with a situation like this. The girl I was dating had the most psycho ex-boyfriend ever. This guy was unstable. He threw stuff at her, broke her door, put holes in her walls, etc. At one point she did have a restraining order against the guy. I never understood their relationship one bit, because she was still "friends" with him.

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My guess this was one of those relationships were they tried to stay "friends" after the breakup. That [censored] never works.

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That's the truth. After all the stuff this douchebag did to her, the fact that she still entertained the idea of being friends with him should have been a huge warning sign for me. It wasn't...I'm naive.

Anyway OP, if the girl really wants it to stop, it will stop. I agree with everyone who said that. It really isn't that hard to not answer the phone and stop replying to text messages. My girlfriend kept doing it, which only encouraged it more. If your girl is really done with him, she will ignore him. If not, look out.

By the way, my ex is currently back with the psycho. The over/under on her calling me in tears to tell me he beat the crap out of her is 3 weeks.

[Hollywade]

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Dude, wtf. She's a grown women (presumably) and should be handling this herself. You have no business with the ex and should keep it that way. This is 100% her problem and you're not her daddy or pimp.

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you shouldn't have got involved. tell your girlfriend to tell the ex that he needs to cease all contact with her,

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Exactly. The whole time this tool was harrassing my girlfriend, I never said a word to him, and this was going on for well over a month. She is 24, and I am not her dad. Furthermore, I am not going to fight somebody to "prove my worth" or "defend her honor." [censored] that. I'm not sending someone to the hospital or, even more likely, sending myself to the hospital to impress a girl or get one of her exes to leave her alone.

It was totally her responsibility to take care of the problem. She did not. They are now banging. No more drama for me.

[Hollywade]

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ps- OP, your gf is a drama queen

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This is another interesting point. After all the [censored] I have gone through in the past month, I think I can safely say I am NEVER dating a girl with ex-boyfriend issues again.

[Dimon]

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if the gf really wanted the messages to stop, she would ignore them and the ex

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she has been trying to do this for a while, but he is really hung.

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FYP? [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

[KotOD]

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You guys are seriously advocating calling the police? what are you nuts?

Besides teh fact that they wont do anything, the OP is the one making threats, not the ex. The Ex is just looking for some poon, OP is an insecure 16 year old trying to pick a fight.

ps- OP, your gf is a drama queen.

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This quote

"she has been trying to do this for a while, but he is really hung up. "

made me think that this is more harrassment than jilted love. It's possible that "a while" means different things to Dave and I.

[adsman]

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if the gf really wanted the messages to stop, she would ignore them and the ex

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she has been trying to do this for a while, but he is really hung.

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FYP? [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

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Oh god, make it stop.

[guids]

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You guys are seriously advocating calling the police? what are you nuts?

Besides teh fact that they wont do anything, the OP is the one making threats, not the ex. The Ex is just looking for some poon, OP is an insecure 16 year old trying to pick a fight.

ps- OP, your gf is a drama queen.

[/ QUOTE ]

This quote

"she has been trying to do this for a while, but he is really hung up. "

made me think that this is more harrassment than jilted love. It's possible that "a while" means different things to Dave and I.

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my girlfriend's exboyfriend has apparently been attempting to drunk-dial here late at night a few times recently, the girl becomes visibly upset, she is going to try to call him, etc leads me to believe it probably hasn't been awhile, or she is just a huge drama queen either way calling teh cops is insane.





I mean the facts are, that the ex just called her a few times late at night when drunk..."drunk dialing" after a break up isnt that big of a deal, he sent her one lewd text, not that big of a deal if she would have just laughed at it and deleted it. Then the OP gets mad and threatens the guy for semi-normal behavior in a lot of cases, escalating the situation. there is something up.


the more I re-read the op, the more I think he is in teh wrong. He threatens the EX, which is a pretty stupid, jealousy laden thing to do, the EX says "ok", makes no threats, doesnt get pissed, and says "ok" and yet the girlfriend still feels the need to try and settle it herself (even though things are settled as far as we know), and the OP is ready to go to war with a gang of guys ready to jump him and/or file a restraining order. Wtf, dramaqueens much?

[tpir]

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friend of me and you

[Hollywade]

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When I was dating my now-wife about 12 years ago, same thing happened. My first reaction was in line with your thoughts, but I eventually asked her to deal with it. Having the girl flat out say she's done with the ex and is involved with you is for sure the way to go.

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So she dealt with it and there was never another problem? Man, that would have been nice.

[Anacardo]

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image002
friend of me and you

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Better meter pls.