Gimme some John Wayne films to add to my queue

[youtalkfunny]

I stumbled across "Rio Grande" at my local library. I was pretty sure that was mentioned on everyone's list here, so I took it home.

This movie was terrible. Absolutely awful. I defy anyone who recommended it to defend their opinion of it.

To refresh your memory:

John Wayne plays a Cavalry colonel, in charge of some God-foresaken outpost in the desert. Their primary mission, it seems, is to harass Indians. Naturally, the Indians don't like it, and they fight back. Whenever the Cavalry gets the upper hand in one of these fights, the Indians retreat to the Rio Grande, a line that the Cavalry has been ordered not to cross under any circumstances.

Now that doesn't sound like too bad of an idea for a Western. Unfortunately, it's only a small part of what we see.

What do we see? Well, since Wayne is a career military man, he never gets to see his family. When he hears that his son just flunked out of West Point (no good at math), he mentions that he hasn't seen his son in fifteen years.

So who shows up in the next batch of recruits? The long lost son, enlisted as a private. Wow, that's a coincidence.

Who shows up on the next wagon to reach the outpost? Wayne's wife! Of course, women aren't allowed to hang out at a cavalry fort, but since her husband AND son are both assigned there, she got a pass, signed by a general.

So that's our movie: The son wants to be a man, the wife wants her family together, the colonel wants to make a man out of his boy, the soldiers strum guitars and sing songs at night (thank heavens for fast-forward)...this film is a mess. WHAT THE HELL IS A WOMAN DOING IN THIS MOVIE??? Did we HAVE to stop the picture three different times so that the vocal group could put on cavalry uniforms and sing in harmony??? This nonsense goes on for over an hour before we finally get a good Indian raid.

I turned it off when the evil Indians set up an ambush and made off with a wagon full of white kids. There's already way too much in this movie that doesn't make any sense. What the hell do the Indians want with a wagon full of white kids?

Of course, John Wayne has to lead the cavalry to rescue the children from the mean, kidnapping Indians. I turned the movie off at this point. To much singing, too much Maureen O'Hara (nothing wrong with Maureen O'Hara, but she doesn't belong here), too much nonsense.

I'm not giving up on John Wayne movies. I just picked a clunker to start off with.

[DrewDevil]

Please, for the love of God, just rent The Cowboys and watch it.

[DoubleDealDecker]

1 The Searchers
2 Red River
3 The Horse Soldiers {I don't think anyone else covered it, except for 'Glory', the best Civil War movie I can think of.}
4 The Cowboys