#1
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Proof That I am a Pussy
Given: I hate spiders. I mean really hate them. I'm scared to death of them.
So anyway. I'm walking up my stairs on Saturday and notice a huge ass spider sitting in the corner of one of the stairs. I think it was reading the morning paper. Checking the ball scores. I run real fast buy it does it doesn't try to protect its newly claimed territory. Since Saturday I haven't really casually gone up and down the stairs. It's get up and get down. No [censored] around. I know the spider is not hanging out on the stairs anymore as there are more interesting places in my house but you just never know. 15 minutes ago: Playing a little poker and notice something out of the corner of my eye. Knowing it could be my new leggy GF I glance out of the corner of my eye. I see said spider crawling up my vertical blinds only about 2 feet from me. Its laughing at me and flipping me off knowing that I don't have the balls. I quickly grab the vacuum cleaner before it can hide because it has to see me going for the weapon. I deftly suck it up. Now my problem is; how long do I need to let the vacuum cleaner run to ensure that it doesn't crawl out the hose. The noise is really getting on my nerves. I am such a puss. |
#2
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Re: Proof That I am a Pussy
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#3
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Re: Proof That I am a Pussy
Now vacuum up some bleach to kill it
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#4
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Re: Proof That I am a Pussy
just think of how vulnerable you are in your sleep
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#5
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Re: Proof That I am a Pussy
[ QUOTE ]
just think of how vulnerable you are in your sleep [/ QUOTE ] I do. |
#6
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Re: Proof That I am a Pussy
I heard we humans swallow ~8 spiders each year when sleeping but I don't know if its true
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#7
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Re: Proof That I am a Pussy
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#8
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Re: Proof That I am a Pussy
isnt there some stat where the average person swallows like 7 spiders a year while they are sleeping?
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#9
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Re: Proof That I am a Pussy
Damn I was reading this and all of a sudden I felt something creepin on my neck and I just punched myself in the neck and now I'm injured thanks dude
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#10
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Re: Proof That I am a Pussy
[ QUOTE ]
I heard we humans swallow ~8 spiders each year when sleeping but I don't know if its true [/ QUOTE ] I've heard this and have seen video of a spider crawling out of a dudes mouth while he is asleep on the couch. What is this [censored] spider doing in there? |
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