Post deleted by Mat Sklansky

[IronFly]

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I have money to burn. Time to have some fun with it.

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This what you think is fun?

Trolling BBV would be more entertaining...

[primetime32]

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This thread is [censored] up. Makes me sick to see what poker does to people.

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Yeah, there should be legislation or something.

[urubu111]

I can´t believe.

[BaronVonAces]

I owe a little over $85,000 to an underground sportsbook here in Toronto. I am very desperate, as if I don't start making regular payments towards this, bad things will happen to me, I've been informed.

Blueman, here's what I'LL do for $11K (we MUST sign a contract before the task is undertaken though, for both our security's sake):

I will gouge a standard corkscrew into my tongue, and twist it all the way through (I will have administered large amounts of opiates to myself first). I will leave it skewered through for 90 seconds, and then unwind it. I will make sure all of the blood that pours out from this will go into a dixie cup, which I will then down in one shot.

I will then squat over my living room rug, and lay out a giant [censored] in the shape of a swastika, which I will then proceed to dance around one hundred times, singing "Frere Jaques".

Deal?

[drexah]

this type of thing would completely [censored] the guy up in the head for the rest of his life. completely sick.

[ArthurDent]

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Weird to say the least, but I'd give more heat to the dude doing this, I think OP is just running with this for a bit.

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this is 100% accurate. sorry if i'm like stepping over the line here. the guy wanted money. i wanted to make him do something [censored] crazy for it. he expressed interest in doing this.

if anybody has some better suggestions i'd be open to reconsidering what he has to do...but its gotta be more than like eating his own turd or something...$11k is a lot of money.

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How about giving him 1k to find you the best mental care 10k can give a disturbed, pathetic boy?

Arthur Dent

[time7T]

holy [censored].. I lost money to CTS trying to get lucky.. I knew the money was important but not life or death situation. I offered the op full story... As far as legal troubles go I will do this on my on will.. Im not doing this for you or anyone I WANT to video tape myself doing something stupid I offer you this blueman



I poop and pee in a cup
I put the contents into a blender for 30 seconds ( lots of poop )
I will microwave this
After I microwave it I will drink it
After I drink it I will vomit into another cup.
Then I will drink the poop and piss vomit
and not eat or drink anything for 2 minutes
After I will punch myself extremely hard in the balls



For those people telling me Im sick and stupid let me explain to you in a short summary.. I have spent 3 nights crying and trying to figure out why I did what I did and trying to find a way to salavage the situation.

I dont want to steal, hurt, or cheat anybody.
This way I sort of punish myself by destroying my self respect for a life lesson about gambling, choices, and meaning of importance... as far as people saying 11k isnt life or death it is..

Whne you need money to save your home, self being, and future then 11k is a lot of money.



My original plan was to gamble a little bit at high stakes and win some pots. Give the original money back like nothing happend and with what I won I would use to suprise my mom who deserves it.. If I could do it working I would.. Im trying to go to school and pay for lots of things regular 19 year olds dont pay for..


**IMPORTANT**
I never complain about my life, blame my father or anybody else.. I simply do what I can to try to be a man and a good son.. I screwed up 1 time in my life and Im trying to fix it and everyone is attacking me.. please stop Im not asking your support but im asking for you not to attack me

[Soundwave]

This thread is depressing.

OP - you're a sad, cold, sorry piece of work. I don't believe in karma, but sometimes I wish I did. Look yourself in the mirror and ask if you like what you see.

Time7T - assuming your story is genuine, I hope your situation works out. Just don't do anything too stupid trying to fix it, huh?

[mbillie1]

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After I will punch myself extremely hard in the balls

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I change my mind, this thread now delivers

[FionnMac]

This has gotta be one massive level...