Classic West Wing: CJ does "The Jackal"

[tomdemaine]

"I don't know what kind of salad it is. I'm eating a salad, okay? I'm doing it. Do I have to know the names? There's no difference between them. It's a bowl of weeds. Some of 'em have cheese. This isn't the kind with cheese. Does that answer your question?"

[punkass]

[ QUOTE ]
"I don't know what kind of salad it is. I'm eating a salad, okay? I'm doing it. Do I have to know the names? There's no difference between them. It's a bowl of weeds. Some of 'em have cheese. This isn't the kind with cheese. Does that answer your question?"

[/ QUOTE ]

"And here I am, eating a salad, which by the way you could smother up this with barbecue sauce, and it would still taste like the ground..."

[youtalkfunny]

[ QUOTE ]
Totally unrelated (except that it's also saved with my YouTube favorites), and not worthy of its own thread, so I'll stick it here:

This cracks me up. I usually think of it when I'm losing a bet on a baseball game. I wish I could find the entire cartoon from which this clip was taken.

[/ QUOTE ]



FOUND IT!

[Yeti]

someone find the scene where bartlett comes in to the oval office having taken both types of medicine and is completely mashed.

that scene is classic, worthy of the best comedies.

[punkass]

[ QUOTE ]
someone find the scene where bartlett comes in to the oval office having taken both types of medicine and is completely mashed.

that scene is classic, worthy of the best comedies.

[/ QUOTE ]

I can't seem to find it, but it's 1x04. They're finding a solution to Toby's problem of potential insider trading when his stock skyrockets after talking to a friend at the stock exchange. They agree that Toby reduce his salary to $1. Another Toby line: "Like I got screwed with my pants on."

[zac7179]

[ QUOTE ]
Toby talking trash on the basketball court to President Bartlett in the opening scene of Season One's "The Crackpots and These Women".

(OK, I admit it, I'm bored tonight.)



(pickup basketball. Josh passes to Toby, who makes a layup over Bartlett. Josh, Toby, and Charlie celebrate. Bartlett is doubled over, hands on knees, gasping for air)

TOBY: Game point!

CHARLIE: Mr President, you look a little winded.

BARTLETT: (gasping the words) I'm fine.

CHARLIE: Maybe you want to sit out for a minute, sir.

BARTLETT: (still bent over) Why would I want to do that?

JOSH: Cuz people are bound to be pretty upset when they find out that we killed the President.

TOBY: Sit down, sir.

BARTLETT: (finally standing straight up) All right, game point, let's go!

TOBY: Sir...

BARTLETT: (emphatically) I'm playing!

TOBY: Mr President, there's no shame in calling it quits. All you have to do is say, "Toby, you're the superior athlete," and slink on off the court.

BARTLETT: Take the ball out, Toby

TOBY: You're really gonna keep playing?

BARTLETT: (getting impatient) Take the ball out! Let's go!

TOBY: This is perfect, you know that? This is a perfect metaphor. After you're gone, and the poets write 'The Legend of Josiah Bartlett', let them write, 'He was a tragic figure,' sir. Let the poets write that he had the tools for greatness, but the voices of his better angels were shouted down by his obsessive need to win!

BARTLETT: You want to play, or write my eulogy?

TOBY: Can I be honest with you, sir?

BARTLETT: (calling someone over) Mr Grant!

(Tall, athletic black man emerges from a nearby car.)

JOSH: Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa. Who's this?

BARTLETT: I'm making a substitution.

TOBY: Who is this guy?

BARTLETT: Mr Grant is a new member of my team.

TOBY: A ringer, perhaps?

BARTLETT: Mr Grant is a federal employee.

TOBY: You know the thing about you, Mr President, isn't so much that you cheat--it's how brazenly *bad* you are at it.

BARTLETT: I beg your pardon!

JOSH: Toby's got a point there, sir.

BARTLETT: When have I ever cheated?

JOSH: (laughs)

TOBY: How about in Florida, playing mixed doubles with me and CJ? You tried to tell us that your partner worked at the American Consulate in Vienna...

BARTLETT: And she did!

TOBY: It was Steffi Graf, sir!

BARTLETT: Well I will admit that the woman bore a striking resemblence to Steffi Graf...

TOBY: (jumping up and down) It was Steffi Graf, you crazy lunatic! You think I'm not going to recognize Steffi Graf when she's serving a tennis ball AT me?

JOSH: Steffi Graf has won quite a few championships, sir. We've had many oppurtunities to see photographs.

BARTLETT: Be that as it may--Toby Ziegler, Josh Lyman, Charlie Young, I would like to introduce Mr Rodney Grant. Mr Grant is Associate Director of the President's Council on Physical Fitness. Game point, your ball, let's go!

TOBY: Whoa, whoa, not so fast.

BARTLETT: What's the problem?

TOBY: (respectfully) Mr Grant, your name sounds awfully familiar. Before you joined up with the President's Council on Physical Fitness--a council, I might add, the President would do well to avail himself of--

(close-up of Bartlett hiding his face behind Grant, so nobody will see him sucking wind)

TOBY: ...is it possible that you've played some organized ball?

GRANT: Yeah, I used to play a little with my friends.

TOBY: And where was that?

GRANT: I'm sorry?

TOBY: Where would that be?

GRANT: (nonchalantly) Duke.

(Josh and Toby laugh)

TOBY: This guy was in the Final Four!

BARTLETT: Take the ball out, Toby! Game point, let's go!

TOBY: All right.

BARTLETT: (telling Grant to guard Toby) He's your man.

TOBY: (to Grant) I'm taking you to the hole!

(Toby dribbles, awkwardly, down the right side of the lane, covered by Grant. Bartlett covers Josh. Toby stops, pump fakes, shoots. Grant swats the weak shot across the street and onto the grass.)

BARTLETT: Let the poets write about that there, Byron! (high-fives Grant)

TOBY: (looking at the ground as he walks) Charlie, guard the new guy.

[/ QUOTE ]

I loved that show those first few early yrs. were the best.

The b-ball guy was Juan Howard of the Washington Wizards and many other NBA teams.

[Shaqqy]

the west wing is the best show ever thats why i ninja bumped this thread the other day yo.

[apefish]

The years that Sorkin was on board were the best written years of any drama on regular TV in recent memory.
The dialogue was fantastic.
Timely appearance of this thread as I've been making my way thru the entire series again lately. I'm up thru season 3 episode 13- The Two Bartlets.

couple last Toby quotes:

Sam Seaborn: Toby, do you really think it's a good idea to invite people to dinner and then to tell them exactly what they're doing wrong with their lives?
Toby Ziegler: Absolutely, otherwise it's just a waste of food.

and

Hamlin: [on why the government should cut funding to PBS] Product licensing for this merchandise brings in over $20 million a year, none of which goes to PBS, all of which goes to the show's producer, the Children's Television Workshop. Now this is a company whose Chief Executive earns high six figures in salary and benefits per year, yet the show is subsidized by taxpayer dollars.
Toby Ziegler: It's a perfectly reasonable complaint.
Sondra: And?
Toby Ziegler: I don't care.

[JuntMonkey]

[ QUOTE ]
The years that Sorkin was on board were the best written years of any drama on regular TV in recent memory.
The dialogue was fantastic.

[/ QUOTE ]

I was about to say Sopranos, but you said "regular" TV so now I'm not sure.

After a while I think TWW's writing starts to grate. It's either manipulative crap about what a righteous liberal Toby is, fun little-known facts spit out quickly so as to appear witty, or pure cheese with copious amounts of saccharine sprinkled all over it.

There's stuff like when Toby gets the dead homeless vet an official funeral on Christmas. A friend of mine who was a fan said "it was so moving." Moving? It was the most manipulative and trite thing I've ever seen in my life.

Then there was CJ's crush on the Secret Service agent. Spoilers in white. <font color="white">He was killed in one of the season finales just as him and CJ were starting to come around to one another. It was incredibly obvious from several episodes earlier that he would die, and to telegraph that is just awful, sloppy writing. </font> Sopranos would never do that.

All this being said, I did recently watch the entire first season and mostly enjoyed it. Sam and Leo and sometimes Josh are really good, but I think Toby is a horrendous character.

[apefish]

Regular meaning non cable.
And as righteous and liberal as Toby's character was written- all the checks to his character are in place in the other characters.
I was simply adding Toby quotes since that's where the thread had gone.
Leo was perhaps the most well written character.