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#1
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I went out to play a small 1/2 nl home game last night, and got completely hammered at the game. I drank all of the yuenglings there because the other beers were all [censored] lights. Once the yuenglings were gone, I started drinking the [censored] lights as a last resort. I considered the absence of any regular beer as a tremendously bad beat at the time, and so I thought it would be cute to take a sip of each beer, and then fill the bottle back up with Jack Daniels. As far as the poker playing went, I played like most drunk people do and lost $100. I don't remember anything after leaving the game, but I somehow drove home AND parked flawlessly.
So I wake up this morning around 10 am, and there is puke all over my bed, the floor and the bathroom (not to mention me). So I decide to wash my clothes next, and two hours later, after removing them from the dryer, I remembered that I had purposely placed my cash in a seperate two-button pocket from everything else incase I did something stupid while drunk. I cringe as I unbutton the pocket and pull out a few soaked $100 bills. I knew that I had lost exactly $100 at the poker game, and so I should have $1060 in the roll. So I count out my money and there is only $660 there. Your guess is as good as mine as to where the other $400 went. For all I know, I could've been pulled over and bribed an officer with it to let me go (which is what I want to believe since it's the most balla scenario). So after taking a shower and eating breakfast at McDonald's, which was composed of a quarter-pounder with cheese, a large fries, and a large vanilla iced coffee, I come home to watch some NFL football while cleaning puke simultaneously. I'm not feeling too great at this point, but I knew that my Philadelphia Eagles were coming off of their bye week, and are 7-0 after the bye under Andy Reid. At this point I remembered my 5 game, 2 under teaser. So in hopes of not making this post a 'tl;dr' I'll make my brag short: Date placed: Nov 11, 2006 6:37p Date settled: Nov 12, 2006 7:15p 7 Team Teaser # 52742538 Football - NFL Lines (Game) (437) Dallas Cowboys Pick Sun@4:15p (Teased 7.0 points) Final Scores Dallas Cowboys 27 Arizona Cardinals 10 Football - NFL Lines (Game) Total (437) Dallas Cowboys vs. (438) Arizona Cardinals Under 50 Sun@4:15p (Teased 7.0 points) Final Scores Dallas Cowboys 27 Arizona Cardinals 10 Football - NFL Lines (Game) (433) Denver Broncos -2½ Sun@4:05p (Teased 7.0 points) Final Scores Denver Broncos 17 Oakland Raiders 13 Football - NFL Lines (Game) Total (433) Denver Broncos vs. (434) Oakland Raiders Under 40½ Sun@4:05p (Teased 7.0 points) Final Scores Denver Broncos 17 Oakland Raiders 13 Football - NFL Lines (Game) (424) Philadelphia Eagles -½ Sun@1:00p (Teased 7.0 points) Final Scores Washington Redskins 3 Philadelphia Eagles 27 Football - NFL Lines (Game) (417) Baltimore Ravens -½ Sun@1:00p (Teased 7.0 points) Final Scores Baltimore Ravens 27 Tennessee Titans 26 Football - NFL Lines (Game) (409) Kansas City Chiefs +8 Sun@1:00p (Teased 7.0 points) Final Scores Kansas City Chiefs 10 Miami Dolphins 13 Outcome: Win Risk $50.00 to win $400.00 |
#2
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That doesn't explain anything.
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#3
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tl;dr
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#4
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I'd still be pissed that I had 1060 instead of 1460.
Nice picks though, dude. |
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