My Wife's Gallstones

[Off Duty]

Beat: My wife wound up in the hospital with extreme abdominal pain yesterday morning around 3 AM. Turned out to be gallstones. They removed the gallbladder yesterday afternoon.

Brag - Gallstones are highly prized in certain Asian cultures as afrodisaics, priced at $900 a gram!

Beat - They won't let my wife keep her trophies.

Variance - it looks like our part of this will only be the $50 copay.

Beat - This was the second trip to the emergency room before 3AM on two consecutive days. Plus, I was out screwing around playing cards till 3am on Saturday morning.

Beat - From 6am on Friday to 11:30 PM Monday night, I got a grand total of 11 1/2 hours of sleep.

Brag - I was totally functional the whole time. How? Thank you Red Bull - like 8-12 of them a day. Usually two or three at once. I usually drink one in the morning if I'm dragging and I'm lit up for the rest of the day.

Variance - if you drink too much Redbull, your piss is exactly the same color as the Redbull you are drinking. Which makes me really question what is in Red Bull to begin with.

Variance - I have finally stopped shaking.

[durkahdurkah]

[ QUOTE ]
Variance - if you drink too much Redbull, your piss is exactly the same color as the Redbull you are drinking. Which makes me really question what is in Red Bull to begin with.


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caffeinated piss, obv