Advice Needed: How to deal with "Friends"

[correia]

Just make it clear that although you are "friends", there are no friends at the table and you will play the same against them as you would against anyone else. Just don't say it in a douche manner and although they probably won't agree with it, maybe they'll understand.

[habsfanca11]

Thanks for all the replies.

Just to clarify - I'm not concerned with what they think of me ... what I'm concerned with is the effect the bruised egos and ruffled feathers have on the mood of the table in general. And specifically keeping some of the loose passive regulars playing in happy loose passive land vs them being disgruntled and either changing tables or getting grumpy and tight.

For instance, back to the Sun. night example, prior to the "incident" (me raising with A,3o) the table is a typical 3/6 LHE table - lots of limping, 5 or 6 to a flop, everybody content and we have a couple of guys calling all the way to the river with Ace high or bottom pair. BB from the incident, does drag the pot, but is clearly really upset - and gets up and leaves to cool off after making his displeasure clear. With BB leaving we now are 2 short of a full table. Some of the grupmy old nits at the table are now clearly more grumpy because we are short handed. The guy on BB's right (who BB is friendly with) isn't happy and makes a couple of comments. The loose passive fish begin to tighten up and the whole happy go lucky mood of the table is completely wrecked. For the next hour we're 3 max. to a flop.

The answer may be that there's nothing I can do and to just keep on playing hard and aggressive. However, this sort of thing is happening more and more often. To the point where people I would prefer to play with are actively changing to tables where I am not.

Again, any views, advice would be appreciated. Thanks to all who reply.

[bav]

Remember there are "friends" and there are "poker friends"...never confuse the two. You tell friends personal things about yourself, you loan friends money, you invite friends to your wedding, you assume a friend will help you get home at 2am when your BAC is 0.25%. Poker friends you make pleasant with at the poker table and probably only know by their first name.

So don't cry TOO much over losing your poker friends just because they don't like your style of play. They were probably about to ask you to stake them after this long run of bad luck they've had, anyway, so it might be a good thing you're not their favorite person.

But if you're playing recreationally with the intention to have a nice time chatting with your "poker friends" and watch the game on the TV's between hands, feel free to alter your style of play to accomodate 'em. It's a 3/6 game, after all. Just kinda make up your mind why you're playing, and do what's appropriate based on that.

[Arbitrage]

move up

[disjunction]

I think at a live 3/6 you are too worried about the mood of the table. Just work on your game. People don't play more cards because they are in a good mood. I'd be surprised if the tightness had anything to do with mood.

The effect it will have, if you "raise with crap" preflop, they will project this onto your postflop play. They will make dumb calldowns, but on the other hand they will stop making stupid laydowns. Roughly a wash.

[Wongboy]

I don't have a ton of B&M experience, but I have had 2 similar incidents happen recently.

Incident #1 - I was playing $1/$2 NL and had KK, so I raised pre-flop and got 1 caller who I had been friendly with. The flop came Q high rainbow. My opponent asked if I had a Queen. I said no. He checked. I bet the pot, he called. Got all-in when a blank hit the turn and went on to win against his JJ. He went ballistic saying that I had lied to him. I pointed out that I was completely honest. He said that I should have known he really meant "do you have top pair or better?".

Incident #2 - Playing $8/$16 LHE. Guy I'm friendly with checks the 2 suited flop saying, "I'm just gonna check it down". I say nothing. Turn comes a 3rd flush card, which made my 2 pair. He checks, I bet, he calls. River fills me up. He checks, I bet, he calls and loses with his flush. He goes ballistic. I pointed out that I clearly wasn't agreeing to check it down when I bet the turn and he should have check-raised me.

I have just ignored these idiots who want to soft play. However, it does kill the table mood quite a bit.

[Quadstriker]

Incident #1 - Laugh in his face.
Incident #2 - Laugh in his face.

Standard.

[Xellos]

The degenerates playing $3/6 usually can't afford to lose the money they're throwing away. Move up to a game where people respect your raises and not their money.

[rasinmachine]

Prepare a list of things you might say when the next situation like this comes up. Try, "Sir I'm sorry but my right hand pushes those checks into the pot all by itself, it has a mind of its own, sometimes i just can't control it, like late last night." Then laugh at your own joke.
The next time you raise you could say "there it goes again." The next time after that hold you right wrist with your left hand as if your trying to stop it and say something like "on no, not again." Try it right now see if it does't bring a smile on your face. Then try it live. If it works great if not, oh well. Play hard have fun.

[Wongboy]

[ QUOTE ]
Prepare a list of things you might say when the next situation like this comes up. Try, "Sir I'm sorry but my right hand pushes those checks into the pot all by itself, it has a mind of its own, sometimes i just can't control it, like late last night." Then laugh at your own joke.
The next time you raise you could say "there it goes again." The next time after that hold you right wrist with your left hand as if your trying to stop it and say something like "on no, not again." Try it right now see if it does't bring a smile on your face. Then try it live. If it works great if not, oh well. Play hard have fun.

[/ QUOTE ]

$4/$8 tight-passive game. Its folded to me on the button, I raise. SB looks at me and says "you know that we were planning to chop, right?" I respond "sorry, I didn't realize that we were playing a home game". That worked pretty well.