Funny/strange things that have happened during sex... - Page 12

weegsly · #**111** 04-27-2006, 07:26 PM

University of Michigan. I honestly was told this story and thought at the time and still think it was true. Perhaps he got the idea elsewhere and actually did it, or perhaps I am being duped. I don't know. Either way I do not read stories on the internet and post them as my own. I have told this story many times over and have yet to come across someone who has heard it. I am new and have rarely posted, but when I have its been honest and will continue to be.

weegsly · #**112** 04-27-2006, 07:28 PM

sorry... the above is in regards to the smearing crap in a girls ass story

BongRips · #**113** 04-27-2006, 07:34 PM

Another one, sorta involves me.

Out on a date with another friend of a friend, and when I am out with this girl I run into said friend, on a date as well. So they join us and we keep drinking, then everyone decides to go back to my house for some drinks, though at this point my date was kinda dissolving as she was boring and I was paying her very little attention. So everyone has a drink at my house but my date, and I start talking to my friend's date about records, so I go show her a couple of my records and my date gets fed up and says she's leaving, so I walk her to the door and decide that it's worth a shot and try to kiss her, obviously failing. Then, after a short discussion with her, I am so drunk I try to kiss her again and she turns her head and then says goodnight and kisses me on the cheek I think, that part is kinda hazy. So I come back upstairs and my bedroom door is closed and there is noise coming from within. So I go lie down on my couch. My friend then RUNS out of my room and into the living room and asks where my condoms are, I tell him and he runs back. I hear more thumping and stuff getting knocked over and decide to just try and pass out. I turn off the TV and just as I am falling asleep, my friend stumbles out of my room and opens the door to my living room slightly. And we have this exchange:
"Dude...I suck."
"Are you [censored] naked?"
"Dude...dude...I suck."
"Why the [censored] are you naked? Get some clothes on!"
"Man, I couldn't get it up."

So he leaves and gets some clothes on. And soon afterwards they head to his place. I go into my room, phone knocked over, records all over the floor, two seperate boxes of condoms ripped open, unopened comdoms everywhere and my entire drawer full of papers tossed (presumably while looking in the wrong drawer for condoms) everywhere. So I clean up. The next afternoon, my friend shows up at my house again and tells me he left the condom somewhere in my room, so he looks around and finds it, all the while assuring me that he never got the condom on or anything.

9cao · #**114** 04-27-2006, 07:43 PM

A little off topic, but funny anyways.

Back home to a small town after first year University at a house party. A pretty crazy friend and I go to one of the bedrooms with these 2 girls who were friends. The girl I am with is a 7 and his girl is like a 2 or 3 (a genuine sea-donkey). Anyways, they decide to go to the other bedroom and I end up fooling around for a while but end up re-joining the party.

About an hour later I meet up with my buddy in the front hall. At this point we are pretty wasted. He asks me how it went and I fill him in. I ask him how it went and he says, "What does this tell you..." and reaches down his pants grabs the end of a condom and proceeds to pull it (no lie) like 2 feet into the air before it releases his dick and snaps into the air and we break out in laughter.

The best part is he forgot all about our chat and the next day he tried telling me and my buddies he only kissed her since she is disgusting. I responded "well what was that little dance you did in the hallway?" the wheels in his head starting spinning, and when the memory came back his mouth dropped and we burst out in laughter again.

He still can't explain/remember why he never took the condom off.

BongRips · #**115** 04-27-2006, 07:47 PM

Oh, and another friend of mine was getting a [censored] from his girlfriend and he pressed her head down a little too hard, and she puked, but the kicker is, her mouthful of vomit was so warm that he blew his load into her mouth.

hard2tel · #**116** 04-27-2006, 07:49 PM

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Funniest story I've ever heard, sex involved, but what happens afterward is hilarious...

Background: During college I was good friends with a guy named Dave in my fraternity. Dave was notorius for getting completely plastered and pissing his bed/in the corner/on the couch/wherever. Has also crapped himself more than once while passed out after a party. We have all been witness to this and Dave has always been an honest guy which assures me that the following story is 100% true.

Story: Dave gets hammered at a party and goes home with a random chick who is in the same condition. Hooks up with her, they pass out naked. Wakes up sometime later that night and realizes that he has crapped the bed and doesn't know what to do. Here is what he comes up with.... Random girl is sleeping on her stomach so Dave scoops some of the poo up (he recounts that it was somewhat soupy) that is on the bed and manages to smear it in her crack without waking her. Leaves a note on her desk that says "You sh#t the bed, I'm leaving, unbelievable." He sees this girl a few weekends later at a party, girl immediately turns crimson and walks away. He never talked to her again. I can only imagine what happened the next morning when random girl wakes up.

Dave is now a legend.

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wow.

nh.

dogdrool · #**117** 04-27-2006, 08:11 PM

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me and a friend were running the train on a girl in my basement with all the lights out, we were all wasted and i rubbed my hand on her p*ssy and got juice all over it and smacked my friend in his face, that was some funny sh*t

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No it isn't.

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Yes, it is.
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another time me friend and his girl were drinkin with me at my house, we were all wasted he drank a little too much and went upstairs to puke and while he was up there his g/f pushed me down and pulled out my d*ck and pulled down her pants and hopped on it, we f*cked for a few minutes while he was puking and as soon as we heard him walking back downstairs we acted as if nothing ever happened, what can i say, she totally took advantage of me hahahahaha

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You are a jerk off.

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No, I don't think he is. That's hilarious.

RiverFenix · #**118** 04-27-2006, 08:33 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Funniest story I've ever heard, sex involved, but what happens afterward is hilarious...

Background: During college I was good friends with a guy named Dave in my fraternity. Dave was notorius for getting completely plastered and pissing his bed/in the corner/on the couch/wherever. Has also crapped himself more than once while passed out after a party. We have all been witness to this and Dave has always been an honest guy which assures me that the following story is 100% true.

Story: Dave gets hammered at a party and goes home with a random chick who is in the same condition. Hooks up with her, they pass out naked. Wakes up sometime later that night and realizes that he has crapped the bed and doesn't know what to do. Here is what he comes up with.... Random girl is sleeping on her stomach so Dave scoops some of the poo up (he recounts that it was somewhat soupy) that is on the bed and manages to smear it in her crack without waking her. Leaves a note on her desk that says "You sh#t the bed, I'm leaving, unbelievable." He sees this girl a few weekends later at a party, girl immediately turns crimson and walks away. He never talked to her again. I can only imagine what happened the next morning when random girl wakes up.

Dave is now a legend.

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Urban legend. Its been posted on 2p2 a bunch and ive known people in real life to have done the same thing.

riverdance · #**119** 04-27-2006, 09:52 PM

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Agreed. This also throws into doubt a classmate of mine from college who said he once crapped his pants when he was at a girls house while drunk. He said he proceeded to swing his pants around over his head and [censored] splattered all over the walls. Now I doubt it.

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this was a scene from the movie "trainspotting"

vhawk01 · #**120** 04-27-2006, 10:02 PM

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University of Michigan. I honestly was told this story and thought at the time and still think it was true. Perhaps he got the idea elsewhere and actually did it, or perhaps I am being duped. I don't know. Either way I do not read stories on the internet and post them as my own. I have told this story many times over and have yet to come across someone who has heard it. I am new and have rarely posted, but when I have its been honest and will continue to be.

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I'm not trying to imply you are a horrible person. Just that you got duped. When I heard it it was at UNC. But the details are EXACTLY the same, with the letter left afterwards, the wording, etc. You got duped man.

But its still a fricking hilarious story. Just not true.