[slim]

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Slim, I'm confused- where are you going, with all of this "affairs are an addiction/let's learn about affairs" information?

Are you trying to educate those of us less informed? Are you exploring/agonizing over why it happened? Is this part of a process where you try to fix your relationship for real and save it? Are you grasping at some reason to justify/excuse her behavior?

It seems to me that you're really starting to get lost in all of this. It doesn't seem like a healthy path

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My point in pointing out the addiction issue is to raise awareness and create discussion on infidelity bc unless you have actually gone through it and have done some research on it, most people will have this misguided belief that affairs are about sex and that "bad" or "immoral" people have affairs. Because of the shear number of people involved in affairs and the number of families ripped apart by affairs, I think it deserves more attention than gambling,alcohol and drugs.

As for me grasping or making excuses for my wife's behaviour, I don't believe I am doing that. I think she is weak and selfish for falling into the infidelity trap. I am not making excuses for her. I think that if people understand that it is an addiction issue, they will be better able to handle it if it happens to them.