beat: angle shot by crafty, old and fat Friendly's employee

[mbillie1]

So this fat, obnoxious, fairly old and altogether far too chatty (in an obnoxious, fat, old way, also bitchy) comes into the store today. She does this a lot. Sometimes to complain, sometimes to intrude into yet another place in the world where she is not wanted. Today she came in with these little coupon books, which she said were 5 coupons for a free kid's meal each. She wanted $5 for the book of them (I assume Friendly's does this as a sort of gesture of friendliness [You see what I did there] to the other people who work in the mall) and she acted very rushed, said these were the only ones she had and that we had better buy them before she runs out. I ask her if I can use it right away, she doesn't seem to hear me. After purchasing this booklet of coupons like the huge sucker that I am, I ask again (louder this time) if I can go get my free kid's meal now. She laughs at me and says they aren't good until September.

I am generally to the point of considering just flaking out altogether and moving south, and this lady just pushed me over the edge. Revenge must be had. What do I do? The only things I've thought of so far are:

1) go eat at Friendly's, get her as a waitress, dip out on the bill
2) go over there and just scream at her, demand my money back, call her a dirty angle-shooter, etc
3) try to con one of my coworkers into purchasing them from me, thus perpetuating the cycle of angle-shooting
4) go eat at Friendly's, take a huge dump in their bathroom, wipe my ass with the coupons and leave the floater as evidence of my disgust

So BBV4L, what it do?

[Dan87]

any answer other than 4 is just incorrect.

[im a model]

what would jesus do? hed probably follow her into the parking lot and find which car is hers. then when she goes to work the next day, take a dump and smear it all over the car. if she doesnt have a car, Turn thy cheek My son.

[Number27]

Wait until september. Find out what section she's in. Give a free coupon to each of your friends. Each sit at a different table. Use coupons + Don't Tip. Maybe write a note on the check about angle shooting.

Then leave a big floater in the toilet with some photo copied kids coupons used as tp.

[Claunchy]

Leaving a turd in the toilet isn't going to affect the shady waitress one bit. Some poor busboy is going to get stuck dealing with that.

I think sitting in her section, being a dick, and stiffing her would probably be sufficient. Or you can just murder her children if she has any.

[mbillie1]

I forgot to add in choice 4 that I would obviously leave this floater in the women's bathroom, where this woman might have a chance of being the one to encounter it.

[tarheeljks]

obviously seducing her and the degrading her sexually is the way to go

[NT!]

i would just tell her boss that she is going around selling books of coupons, that is almost certainly not kosher

then get some of your buddies to go there, torment her and then complain to the manager about her. every day. until she kills herself.

[willie]

#4 looks dominant and is my choice

i'd use the poo like glue and stick them to the toilet seat though

[sonneti]

[ QUOTE ]
then get some of your buddies to go there, torment her and then complain to the manager about her. every day. until she kills herself.

[/ QUOTE ]

This & #1 with a #4 on the windscreen of her car [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]