My Wife's New "Buddy"

[Born 2 Loose]

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I have never met a guy who just "wants to be friends" with a female. At one point or another he bascially wants to bone your wife.

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and that she initiated contact with him because his profile looked cool and he lives in our area, very close-by in fact.

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Add these quotes up and I think your course of action should be clear.

[tdarko]

she is reluctant to show you emails exchanged between her and another man? yeah, listen to mr. trik he gives sound advice.

[GirlTrouble]

I'll do it before ElDiablo gets here:

Kill the wife. Kill the man. Kill your children and their puppets. Burn down the neighborhood and piss on the campfire.

Then *poof* He was gone. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[Phoenix1010]

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Thanks Mr.T,
I appreciate your viewpoint since I tend to agree with you and can see myself giving the same advice to others.

However, now that I'm in it, I find myself agreeing with Dom. For whatever reason, I hate this relationship and she should respect that.

Still, doesn't anyone else think this might drive her away further. Maybe I'm just being a pussy...

**UPDATE
While writing this post she called and I told her that I wanted to see the email he's been writing her. She got really bummed and said really? I said I knew I was being unreasonable and she said yeah you are. Damn!

Now I'm wondering whether the whole thing is some kind of game she's playing (probably subconciously because she's usually not that much of a bitch) where she's testing to see how badly I'll overreact to this innocent thing. I don't know...this sucks.

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No. Do not read the E-mail, no matter how much better it will make you feel. Show her that you trust her and do not make her feel like you're paranoid. She deserves to have her privacy repsected. Apologizing for demanding to read the E-mails will be a good start.

[CollinEstes]

Dude there is probably something in those emails she doesn't want you to read, like maybe something you did or do that she was ranting about or something like that. If it was truly inoccent then why would it matter if you read them?

She is going to try to make this all about her, like most women. You should use guilt here, it is a strong weapon. Say something like, "I just want you to be happy even if it hurts me alittle."

She shouldn't just disregard your feelings.

[RunDownHouse]

I'm pretty sure you should read her emails when she's not around.

[CollinEstes]

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I'm pretty sure you should read her emails when she's not around.

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Yeah or get one of those nanny cams or something. Maybe you should go in and set up your preferences to block that website and then just act like you have no idea why it won't come up. Or get one of those parental programs that monitors chating and emails and stuff of their kids.

[kiemo]

Call your wife right now and see if she is available.

Shes not becuase the guy is balls deep in her ass right now.

Sorry dude, if you had been more of man she wouldnt have had to look elsewhere for the affection she wanted.

[Miggo]

I'm a married guy, longer than you though, but if my wife did this I don't know how I'd react either. I'd probably feel about as bad as someone who calls an all-in bet with the second nut flush.

I don't see anything wrong with having male friends, even ex boyfriends, plutonic relationships of course. The main problem that I see, and I think you see too, is ... What the hell is she doing emailing guys she's meeting on the internet.

To be honest, I think you have to squeeze an answer to that question out of her. Once you get an honest answer for that, and go on a weekend sex retreat together or something, and start making her the center of your life for awhile then you guys can get back to normal. Sorry to be brash (sp), just my 2 cents.

[Pyromaniac]

well, this is a thread already chock full of big advice, so all I can add is little advice.

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While writing this post she called and I told her that I wanted to see the email he's been writing her. She got really bummed and said really? I said I knew I was being unreasonable and she said yeah you are. Damn!

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It would probably be helpful if you didn't undercut yourself like this. How are you going to communicate with her and express *your* feelings if you anticipate and agree with *her* view on things?

Try asking questions rather than making statements. If she's showing reluctance to show you the emails, ask, "does that bother you that I want to see them?" then ask, "why?"

then ask, "how do you think all this makes *me* feel?"

Pyro

edit: p.s. I empathize/sympathize with your situation. good luck. no idea how it will turn out because I don't think you've got all the pieces of the puzzle yet.