My Wife's New "Buddy" - Page 7

RunDownHouse · #61 10-28-2005, 03:49 PM

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Total BS.

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I typically think Dom's advice is horrible, but even I agree with him on this one.

asofel · #62 10-28-2005, 03:50 PM

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you are missing my point of my extremely clever and hilarious hypothetical situation [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img].

i wouldn't want to have her guy friends to have been met in that situation. co-workers, sure. college friends, sure. but guys go on these websites to bang women or else they are gay, no heterosexual male spends time fluffing up a web page just to "meet" women and become friends with them only. this is the situation in which they met and i wouldn't like it.

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So a woman's life ends after college? The new medium (the internet) is not a valid way to meet friends? I call BS.

I must go now, have a RL deal. I hope the OP got some ideas and acts on the ones that make sense to him.

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Otis?

jakethebake · #63 10-28-2005, 03:50 PM

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"Well, it's my right to go out wih my buddies on the weekend and party - I'm not cheating, I'm not doing anything wrong."

No, you're not - except you're hurting your wife's feelings by not spending time with her. Your wife's feelings COMES FIRST. Period.

It doesn't matter that what you're doing is "not wrong," it's still hurting your wife. Address that! Come to a compromise!

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I think you're a little strong on this one, Dom. The compromise part is the key here. If you just let her demand you stay home all the time, then you're the one getting hurt. You can't just let her demand you stay home all the time either. You have to strike a balance. Give each other space and time to do things apart, but also do plenty together. If you can find the balance no one's feelings should get hurt.

tdarko · #64 10-28-2005, 03:53 PM

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So a woman's life ends after college? The new medium (the internet) is not a valid way to meet friends? I call BS.

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huh?

people don't go out anymore to meet and socially interact? i believe it, the majority feel safer hiding behind a computer and typing what they would never say if they were in person.

i guess i still don't understand meeting people on the internet (and i am in my mid 20's).

The Vibesman · #65 10-28-2005, 03:54 PM

I pretty much agree with Dom and the others here. It's a little weird.

That said, I fully expected to open this thread and see a picture of a vibrator, along with a guy wondering if he should feel threatened.

mason55 · #66 10-28-2005, 03:56 PM

Go eff a bar skank. Get crabs. Give your wife crabs.

That will teach her.

jakethebake · #67 10-28-2005, 03:56 PM

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I pretty much agree with Dom and the others here. It's a little weird.

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It's very weird. I wasn't referring to his advice to the op. I was referring to the example I quoted.

GirlTrouble · #68 10-28-2005, 03:58 PM

Thanks Mr.T,
I appreciate your viewpoint since I tend to agree with you and can see myself giving the same advice to others.

However, now that I'm in it, I find myself agreeing with Dom. For whatever reason, I hate this relationship and she should respect that.

Still, doesn't anyone else think this might drive her away further. Maybe I'm just being a pussy...

**UPDATE
While writing this post she called and I told her that I wanted to see the email he's been writing her. She got really bummed and said really? I said I knew I was being unreasonable and she said yeah you are. Damn!

Now I'm wondering whether the whole thing is some kind of game she's playing (probably subconciously because she's usually not that much of a bitch) where she's testing to see how badly I'll overreact to this innocent thing. I don't know...this sucks.

jakethebake · #69 10-28-2005, 04:00 PM

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Still, doesn't anyone else think this might drive her away further.

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Not if you drag her back by the hair.

Phoenix1010 · #70 10-28-2005, 04:01 PM

I disagree somewhat. Yes what she is doing is inapproriate and unfair to her husband. However, reacting indignantly and forcefully will cause far more problems than it solves. What's important here is honesty and compromise. You're not a jerk for telling your wife that it makes you uncomfortable to have private relationships with men you don't know. That's a normal reaction. I'm quite sure that she doesn't think she's doing anything wrong, and probably wouldn't be aware that there's a problem. You have to let her know. If you're most important to her, it won't be an issue. Dealing with this calmly, honestly, and fairly will open the door for you to discuss the other problems that appear to be going on in your relationship.