My Wife's New "Buddy"

[CollinEstes]

I have never met a guy who just "wants to be friends" with a female. At one point or another he bascially wants to bone your wife.

[derosnec]

This is great news for you. Now you have a passport to the women of the world. Jump on it.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

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She does have other male friends that I totally trust her around, including an ex-boyfriend.

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This alone should be setting of alarms. No good can come of it.

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While I agree with the general sentiment of the vast majority of the replies here, this one I'll take issue with a bit. Maybe you meant there's something wrong with the ex-boyfriend, which I won't argue with. However, there's nothing wrong with a woman having male friends.

[Dominic]

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I believe in nipping problems like this in the bud, before they evolve into bigger problems.

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Right. Like with Hitler in Munich. They never should have let him get away with that. You have to eradicate these things early before they get outta hand.

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LOL...wait, am I Hitler or is the OPs original problem Hitler??

[Soul Daddy]

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Is he gay? No? Then he has no business making friends with your wife.

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Huh? I don't see how the guy is really at fault here.

[CrazyEyez]

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yeah she told you, she also may be smarter than you and telling you so that you don't worry when something really is going on or there is potential. either way its strange and i wouldn't have it. make it stop.

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Hmmm...metagame strategies. BIMO

[GirlTrouble]

Thanks for the quick response "Dr."

Here's the thing. As others are pointing out, looking weak and jeleaous is not exactly the best way to inspire her admiration, if she is indeed being flirty. I don't want to make her do anything without my knowledge and I really don't want to make her take some "stand" on how she's allowed to have male friends or something.

The suggestion about taking the two of them out somewhere and looking cool seemed OK, except that she has never met the guy, so it would be like I was encouraging her to get to know him!

How do I put a stop to it without seeming like an insecure douche? Honestly I am not that afraid of the guy, I just think it's risky to pretend nothing's going on.

[sublime]

I am 99% sure she is not cheating on me,

but she is. she is giving attention to a another man that should be going to you.

you should:

A) explain this to her
B) beat her with a sockfull of nickels

the fact that she was open with you shows she is a nice person, which is why i say nickels instead of nails.

[CrazyEyez]

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She does have other male friends that I totally trust her around, including an ex-boyfriend.

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This alone should be setting of alarms. No good can come of it.

[/ QUOTE ]
While I agree with the general sentiment of the vast majority of the replies here, this one I'll take issue with a bit. Maybe you meant there's something wrong with the ex-boyfriend, which I won't argue with. However, there's nothing wrong with a woman having male friends.

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I might have overreacted. I'm commenting specifically on being friends with an ex. Maybe it's not wrong, but it sure strikes me as weird.

[A_C_Slater]

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I believe in nipping problems like this in the bud, before they evolve into bigger problems.

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Right. Like with Hitler in Munich. They never should have let him get away with that. You have to eradicate these things early before they get outta hand.

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LOL...wait, am I Hitler or is the OPs original problem Hitler??

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The problem is Hitler. Once Chamberlain was willing to hand over the Czechoslovakian Sudetanland to Hitler's demands it allowed him to have a perfect southern flanking position on Poland. And then we have the start of WW2. If only Chamberlain had said "no" to giving Hitler that seemingly insignificant small strip of moutainous, bunker filled terrain.