B&M Cliches

[Wetdog]

(someone to an all-in player) "Good luck, all in." Yeah stfu. You don't mean that.

Some more - "Internet poker is rigged. You can buy programs on Ebay to cheat for you." "The river will either make you or break you." My wife says that all the time. I just want to shove a watermelon in her pie hole when she does that.

Here's two of my favorites:
Four to the flop - "Four fun seekers."
Four Asians to the flop - "Four prayers."

[CountStackula]

I didn't read all of these, so, I apologize if they have already been said...

These actually made me QUIT dealing.

2-4 limit game at F-woods. Guy bets 2, woman raises to 4, the next player says, "Too rich for my blood".

Are you effing kidding me?

WITHIN A HALF AN HOUR AT THE SAME GAME....

A guy was facing a bet on the river and as he's folding he exclaims' "You gotta know when to Holdem..." You get the rest.

As I threw up in the back of my throat I realized that I needed to get out of the business quickly.

[eastcoaster]

[ QUOTE ]
2-4 limit game at F-woods. Guy bets 2, woman raises to 4, the next player says, "Too rich for my blood".


[/ QUOTE ]

It used to be "Two to you or toodle-oo" meaning you can either call the $2 or fold. This was a long time ago at the Taj.

Someone (a dealer) said it to me once...but I raised it to $4.

[1-Lucky-SOB]

Honk Kong Flush / Hong Kong Straight - four card busted draw, after the betting has ended.


-1

[PBJaxx]

Well, I actually read through all of this and I didn't see the one that drives me the most crazy:

"Big blind special"

Another one I have seen a few times at loose-passive old man limit tables is:

"If you're gonna raise every hand, why don't you just go play <one limit higher than the table>?"

Once I saw an old guy freak out because I bet into the pfr on the flop and he raised. As the old guy called two cold he yelled at me "Thats why you CHECK to the bettor!!" I proceeded to make it 3 bets to go. Obligitory holla!

[Keys Myaths]

[ QUOTE ]
(someone to an all-in player) "Good luck, all in." Yeah stfu. You don't mean that.


[/ QUOTE ]

Actually, when I call or someone else calls my all-in, I say it, and mean it.

I don't check my good-naturedness at the sign-in table, and I get a lot more action because of it.

[MrBrightside]

[ QUOTE ]
Well, I actually read through all of this and I didn't see the one that drives me the most crazy:

"Big blind special"

Another one I have seen a few times at loose-passive old man limit tables is:

"If you're gonna raise every hand, why don't you just go play <one limit higher than the table>?"

Once I saw an old guy freak out because I bet into the pfr on the flop and he raised. As the old guy called two cold he yelled at me "Thats why you CHECK to the bettor!!" I proceeded to make it 3 bets to go. Obligitory holla!

[/ QUOTE ]

No doubt. I would 3-bet on general principle then shout "that's why you BET INTO the bettor, nit!"

[MandM_WSU]

Playing 3/6 in Reno, had a dealer say, "call if you like sex" on the $6 streets. Got anoying after a while.

[MicroBob]

I don't think this is a common cliche...but I also don't think it's funny enough to belong in the 'funny cliches' thread so I'm putting it here.


Single-table satellite:
UTG limps, couple other players limp, dealer looks at the SB and BB who both tap....then must have lost track as she looks at UTG limper who also taps.

Then they look at each other and realize that he wasn't in a blind.
I creatively chime-in, "He didn't have an option...but he takes it anyway."

Dealer smiles politely. Nobody else cared.
Dealer gets tipped a little more when I win the whole thing.

[tom10167]

This thread is ancient and obviously tl;dr but any time this goes down:

What'd you have?
-The nuts
-Really?
-Yeah, you folded, so I had the nuts cuz I won. WOW SO WITTY PLZ SIR TEACH ME YOUR TRICKERY SKILLZ FOR WOMENS

I just want to punch them so hard in the face it's not even funny.