Dumb jokes you still find hilarious

[bmxicle]

did you hear about the fire in the circus?

It was INTENSE.

[Magisastar]

Two muffins are sitting in the oven, getting baked.
One of the muffins turns to the other and says "Gee its hot in here".
The other muffin reply's.
"Holy [censored]!!!, a talking Muffin!"

[KOTLP]

What did the snail riding on the back of the turtle say?









Wheeeeeee!!

[KOTLP]

Why do women fake orgasms?







Because they think we care.

[sevenhigh]

what did the elephant say to the naked man?










how do u breathe through that thing.

A couple visits Niagra Falls for their 50th anniversary. They do the wild thing that night, or as wild as 70 year olds get.

She says "Wow. I think you felt bigger than you did 50 years ago!".

"I'd hope so! I had it folded in half."

[ckboddic]

[ QUOTE ]
Jewish kid goes to his dad and says
"Hey dad, can I have $40?"


Dad replies
"thirty dollars?, what do you need twenty dollars for?"

[/ QUOTE ]

I think the reply is something more like

thirty bucks? What do you need twenty bucks for? I don't have ten bucks.

[eviljeff]

[ QUOTE ]
A couple visits Niagra Falls for their 50th anniversary. They do the wild thing that night, or as wild as 70 year olds get.

She says "Wow. I think you felt bigger than you did 50 years ago!".

"I'd hope so! I had it folded in half."

[/ QUOTE ]

I, uh, don't get it

[protocol]

All these knock-knocks made me think of my favorite one from elementary school:

Me: Hey, I've got a great knock-knock joke. You start.
Them: Knock-knock.
Me: Who's there?
Them: Uhhhh...

[bent96]

[ QUOTE ]
A poor guy and a rich guy are in a bar and both their wives' birthdays are coming up.

Poor Guy: Have you decided what you're getting your wife for her birthday?
Rich Guy: Yeah, I think I'm getting her a nice diamond bracelet and a 2006 Mercedez.
Poor Guy: WOW, that's SOME present. But, why the two gifts?
Rich Guy: Very simple. I don't wanna be bothered. If the bracelet doesn't fit her, she can drive it back to the jewelry store in her Benz. What about you?
Poor Guy: I can't afford any of that stuff, but I've already picked out a nice pair of slippers and a dildo.
Rich Guy: That's odd. I guess it's the thought that counts, but if you can't afford to spend that much money, why buy her more than one present?
Poor Guy: (in white) <font color="white">Well, it's very simple. If the slippers don't fit her, she can go [CENSORED] herself!</font>

[/ QUOTE ]

I [censored] stared at this junk for 10 minutes, and I couldn't understand why the punchline was "in white." In white what? I thought.

I have reached a new level of stupidity...