Funny and/or Effective Quips to Problem Players

[bav]

[ QUOTE ]
I'd have thought in all that time you'd have learned to behave like an adult."

[/ QUOTE ]
BAAAAaaad plan for a dealer to get lippy. I understand letting fly in the heat of the moment, but if a player takes offense you could easily get reported for it. Dealers are supposed to remain professional. PLAYERS...now we get to do verbal battle with each other (up to some hopefully pre-blow-up limit).

[ QUOTE ]
If my sister had a dick she'd be my brother.

[/ QUOTE ]
Another example of something any player could say and get away with, but if said by an employee could generate paper reports. Probably a one in a hundred shot some chick at the next table will hear it and be offended and care to report it, but just not a good plan for job longevity (though it may add to job satisfaction for the duration).

If you want to move beyond simple professional responses, you need to be aiming for clever, cute, clean, funny quips that are not insulting.

Sucks to sit in the box and have to put up with crap, but that's a sad part of the job.