Girl I'm dating suddenly has a boyfriend - what's my play?

[dauler]

[ QUOTE ]
She always seemed quite interested in going to the movies, meeting for a drink or whatever, but due to the fact that I was travelling quite a bit for work reasons on the weekends and she was preparing for exams during the week, this didn't materialize until late in January.

[/ QUOTE ]
Let me guess. First you hesitantly probed about going out sometime, probably a time when you knew you'd be traveling soon, and when she indicated interest you said, "Cool, unfortunately I'll be traveling soon, but some other time definitely" and stopped showing effort for a while, then asked her again later and immediately gave up when she tested you with "Oh, I've got some exams..." Then when you go out, you play it safe by having completely platonic conversations and not touching her at all, leaving her wondering whether you're gay or just want to be friends.

[ QUOTE ]
But last time, she casually mentioned that she now has a boyfriend (who lives in the same city). The weird thing is that she didn't do this in a "Look-we-must-talk-I-have-a-boyfriend-now-so-we-should-stop-meeting-the-way-we-recently-did" sort of way, but it was more like "Tonight was great as usual, when will we next go out? Oh, next Thursday is bad, I've already promised my new boyfriend to do [whatever it was]".

[/ QUOTE ]
Then at some point she gets fed up wondering and just decides to lay the "boyfriend" card out there to see how you react, at which point you probably react with meek confusion and stop trying to show any inappropriate affections towards her, while still being friendly. Hello friend.

[Bicycles_Biatch]

this has happen to me a few times... go out once in a blue moon and keep her on the back burner... when she breaks it off or gets broken up with... then you are ready to pounce on rebound sex...

If you really "like" or "love" this chic...then man up and tell her you want a chance to compete for her azz. that the next time you go out... it will be a "date".

[wiper]

i'm glad i'm not the only one wondering what this hobby is...

i'll leave with the assumption that i'll never know..

[SuperUberBob]

Approach the boyfriend and claim that she was cheating on him with yourself. You didn't know it until she mentioned you in a past conversation.

Watch chaos.

Could work. But you might get your ass kicked also.

[fak8629]

Just grow some balls and ask her.

[Sponger.]

I almost have to assume that TheVicar saw this post on another message board and found it so funny he had to post it here.

[SossMan]

Sucks that you got a job transfer to where her university is and she's dogging you like this. surely there is something you can do to make her like you more, right? I wouldn't give up on it...keep buying her dinner when she's not w/ her new boyfriend and make sure you are always available when she calls.

[By-Tor]

was your 'hobby' NAMBLA and 'her' hobby being a 14 year old boy?

[Bakedd]

[ QUOTE ]
. Since then, we have been out for dinner once and been to the movies twice (with a lot of cocktails and good conversation afterwards)

This my friend is not dating

[Golden_Rhino]

You're obviously her backup. She keeps you around in case things don't work out with the guy she actually want to f**k.

Run.