post the nerdiest joke you know

[RoundTower]

An astronomer, a physicist and a mathematician are in Scotland for the first time. While on the train to Glasgow, they see a brown cow in a field. The astronomer looks out the window and says "look, cows in Scotland are brown!" The physicist looks out and says "I wouldn't go that far. Some Scottish cows are brown." The mathematician looks out on the same scene, turns back, and tells them "There is at least one field in Scotland, containing at least one cow, at least one side of which is brown."

[Isura]

[ QUOTE ]
Your mama's so fat you have to integrate her by parts.

[/ QUOTE ]

nice

[chiachu]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

What is integral (1/cabin) d cabin?
A houseboat


[/ QUOTE ]

for those who aren't smart enough to google it:

Person 1: What's the integral of 1/cabin?

Person 2: A log cabin.

Person 1: No, a houseboat - you forgot to add the C!

[/ QUOTE ]

i took me a while to figure out how to get from log cabin to houseboat [img]/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]

[chiachu]

[ QUOTE ]
A mathematician and an engineer are placed at one end of a football field. The most beautiful woman in the world is on the other side. They're told that every hour they can each move half way toward the girl. The mathematicial immediately rolls his eyes in disgust and starts to walk away. He notices the enginner is beaming. "You'll never get all the way there you know!" he cries in frustration, to which the engineer responds: "Yes but I can get close enough!"

[/ QUOTE ]

ive always liked this one

[Koss]

Heisenberg is driving down the road when a cop pulls him over. The cop asked him "Do you know how fast you were going?" Heisenberg replied, "no, but I know exactly where I am!"

[Fishmonger]

[ QUOTE ]
Heisenberg is driving down the road when a cop pulls him over. The cop asked him "Do you know how fast you were going?" Heisenberg replied, "no, but I know exactly where I am!"

[/ QUOTE ]Laughing at this really made me feel like a nerd.

[poincaraux]

Speaking of cops ..

Astonomer #1: .....so anyway the cop pulls me over and asks if I realized that I had just run a redlight. So I said that I did not see the light as being red, because it must have blue-shifted as i was approaching it.
Astronomer #2: And he let you go?
Astronomer #1: No. He gave me a speeding ticket intead.

[ElaineMonster]

Masochist says to the sadist, "Whip me, beat me, hurt me."
Sadist say, "no."

[MrWookie]

[ QUOTE ]
A mathematician and an engineer are placed at one end of a football field. The most beautiful woman in the world is on the other side. They're told that every hour they can each move half way toward the girl. The mathematicial immediately rolls his eyes in disgust and starts to walk away. He notices the enginner is beaming. "You'll never get all the way there you know!" he cries in frustration, to which the engineer responds: "Yes but I can get close enough!"

What is integral (1/cabin) d cabin?
A houseboat

The science major asks: why does it work?
The engineering major asks: how does it work?
The liberal arts major asks: would you like fries with that?


Finally, some limericks:

There was once a girl named Irene
who lived on distilled kerosene
she started absorbin'
a new hydrocarbon
and since there has never benzene.

A proton once said, "I'll fulfill
My long-term belief in free will.
Though theorists (may) say
That I ought to decay
I'm damned if I think that I will."


and the best limerick of all time:

A friend who's in liquor production
owns a still of astounding construction
the alcohol boils
through old magnet coils
she says that it's proof by induction.

[/ QUOTE ]

There once was a man named Fisk,
Whose stroke was excessively brisk,
He stroked with such action,
That the Lorentz Contraction,
Reduced his dong to a disk.

[divides_by_zero]

Why is formic acid really a base?

Because it's an ANTacid!

...sadly this is an original from back in high school.