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#131
05-04-2006, 12:02 PM
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Re: favorite Seinfeld line
[ QUOTE ]
GEORGE: Well, if I hear you correctly--and I think that I do--my advice to you is to finish your meal, pay your check, leave here, and never mention this to anyone again. JERRY: Can't be done, huh? GEORGE: The Switch? JERRY: "The Switch." GEORGE: Can't be done. JERRY: I wonder. GEORGE: Do you realize in the entire history of western civilization no one has successfully accomplished the Roommate Switch? In the Middle Ages you could get locked up for even suggesting it! JERRY: They didn't have roommates in the Middle Ages. GEORGE: Well, I'm sure at some point between the years 800 and 1200--somewhere--there were two women living together. JERRY: The point is I intend to undertake this. And I'll do it with or without you. So if you're scared, if you haven't got the stomach for this, let's get it out right now! And I'll go on my own. If not, you can get on board and we can get to work! Now what's it going to be? GEORGE: All right, dammit, I'm in. JERRY: I couldn't do it without you. GEORGE: All right. Let's get to work. [/ QUOTE ] Right after this, the show went to commercial break. I remember the first time I saw this I laughed out loud throughout the entire commercial break. The other scene that kills me is when Jerry Steals the Marble Rye from the old lady. 
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#132
05-04-2006, 07:01 PM
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Re: favorite Seinfeld line
Jerry: You have no idea what an idiot is, Elaine just gave me a chance to get out, and I didn't take it, this is an idiot.
George: Is that right?, I just threw away a lifetime of guilt free sex, and floor seats for every sporting event in Madison Square Garden, so please a little respect for I am Costanza, Lord of the Idiots.
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#133
05-04-2006, 07:15 PM
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Re: favorite Seinfeld line
Jerry "You're spotting dimes and eating onions, I don't know what the hell's going on!"
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#135
05-04-2006, 08:16 PM
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Re: favorite Seinfeld line
Jimmy might have a compound fracture.
Jimmy's gonna get you kramer, Jimmy holds grudges! (Kramer on novicane inside a cab with an old dude who thinks he's retarded): Old guy: You're really independant. Kramer: You're not doing to bad yerself.
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#138
05-05-2006, 12:01 PM
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Re: favorite Seinfeld line
It is hard to believe that there is still much to contribute to this thread! Feel free to correct inaccuacies!
Pipe down chorus boy!! Master of the house..... Jerry: Are you sure we don't want to do the voice anymore? Darren? Darren: Sorry Mr. Seinfeld Kramer, you see - you're a pod. I, on the other hand, am a human being and sometimes feel uncomfortable when I'm around other human beings. CARTWRIGHT!!!!!!!!! Kramer: Dont you see? Jerry IS O' Brien!!! Insane? You wanna know what's insane? The price I can get you on a computer! Jerry: What kind of perfume is that? Girlfriend: I'm not telling Jerry's brain: That's *real* normal. Jackie Childs: Your face...is my case! Puddy, finding out he is going to hell - "This is BOGUS!" ITS ALL PIPES!!! Elaine to Keith Hernandez: "I'd make sure I take a look at the 3rd base coach - I don't think he is waving you home" Kramer to George's girlfriend after the nose job: "You got butchered" Favorite Scene ever: when Jerry thinks his accountant is a coke head and sends Kramer into a bar to find out. Kramer kicks the bathroom stall door in on him when he is taking a dump and takes a Polaroid!! Priceless!!
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#139
05-05-2006, 12:33 PM
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Re: favorite Seinfeld line
[ QUOTE ]
Favorite Scene ever: when Jerry thinks his accountant is a coke head and sends Kramer into a bar to find out. Kramer kicks the bathroom stall door in on him when he is taking a dump and takes a Polaroid!! Priceless!! [/ QUOTE ] *In the bar. Barry is drinking by the counter. Kramer enters.* Kramer: I'll have a brewsky , Charlie. Bartender: Name's Mitch. Kramer: Oh, there's nothing like a cold one after a long day, eh? Barry: Yeah. Kramer: Oh yeah, I've been known to drink a beer or two. But then again, I've been known to do a lot of things. *Waiter opens the counter which hits Kramer on the head* Kramer: Cigarette? Barry: No, I never touch them. Kramer: I suck'em down like Coca-Cola. Well here's to feeling good all the time. *Kramer drinks the beer and smokes the cigarette at the same time* *Barry sniffs* Kramer: Looks like you've got yourself a little cold there, eh? Barry: I don't think so. Kramer: Me neither. *Kramer puts the cigarette wrong way to his mouth* *Back in the bar.* Kramer: South America? Barry: Yeah, yeah. Kramer: That's importuning(?) continent. Barry: They are expanding their economic base. Kramer: Tell me about it. Barry: Excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom. Kramer: I'm hip. Barry: Hip to the what? Kramer: To the whole scene. *sniff* Barry: What scene? Kramer: The bathroom scene. *sniff, sniff* Barry: Listen, don't take this personally, but when I'm coming back I'm sitting over there.
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