Classic Stripper Lines (to their customers)

[Sluss]

Just thought of this one after the Sopranos. Tip a girl who just hops on your lap when your sitting away from the stage. Then she says, "Oh that's okay I just wanted to dance for you." Then stands up and walks away with the money.

[philnewall]

Me "I want a chick with a dick"
Her "I used to have one."

[Apathy]

[ QUOTE ]
So uhmm... why the [censored] did you give her the 20? Charity?

[/ QUOTE ]

it rhymes with charity...

try:

HILARITY!

[jfish]

[ QUOTE ]
I went to the strip club around December of 2004 and got a lap dance and after it was over the stripper kissed me on the mouth. I haven't been to a strip club since.

[/ QUOTE ]

hahah

[-Skeme-]

Drunk, chillin with the stripper, before lap dance, waiting for current song to end:

Me: What kinda music do you listen to?
Stripper: Everything..
Me: That's what everyone says.
Stripper: Well I listen to everything except country and hard metal.
Me: That's what everyone who says they listen to everything says.
Stripper: You're cute.
Me: You aint lyin'.

Earlier, when we just got in and were taking in the scenery and being bothered by the chicks, we'd just point to our friend and say he had all the cash so they'd bother him.

Me: Hit up our friend when he gets back from the bathroom, he's the rich one.
Stripper: I'm not a gold digger..
My friend: Just a stripper.

[vanwely]

Hey you lacrosse guys have a lot of money, don't you?

Vanwely

[GeniusToad]

"Once again, hun, you can't touch them."

[Rduke55]

[ QUOTE ]

Hey you lacrosse guys have a lot of money, don't you?

Vanwely

[/ QUOTE ]

Nice.

[TheMaroon]

[ QUOTE ]
.
i bitched out due to
1)lack of funds
2)im a bitch


[/ QUOTE ]
3) lack of desire to contract HIV

[TheMaroon]

The one I always get:
"Normally I charge $250 for that, but for you, $500".