Trip report: Bellagio & Wynn 5/10NL, Rhino, Brandi sighting - *LONG*

[octaveshift]

Long and quite possibly boring. Don't say you weren't warned.

Met up with 3 friends in Vegas for our yearly get together last week, and here are some of the highlights.

Got in at 3:00pm on Thursday, and headed to the Bellagio with one of my friend's who got in at the same time.

Beat: They had wanted $600 a night for the room, so I used about a trillion Amex points to pay instead. I'm not a huge fan of the Bellagio, considering I am only 33, and it seems to attract a good portion of wealthy, Viagra-popping, 50+ year old men with mistresses in tow.

The room was just like every other Bellagio room I've been in, which is to say, nothing to write home about. Unfortunately, my friends like it because of the "location," so I was overruled. "What do you mean you like it's 'location'? You mean, you like that that it's in Vegas?" Whatever.

Check in and drop the bags off, and my friend asks me if I want to gamb00l... I say sure, and we head down to the 3 Card Poker (aka Ass-Raping) table. I'm not a table games guy, but my friends aren't really poker players - so I allocated some money for table games to be social, because otherwise, I'd likely never see them. I slide the dealer my player's club card, and proceed to drop about $500 in about 20 minutes. "Sorry for your luck sir." Yay for 3 card! I tell my friend that I "[censored] hate table games", and that I am going to play some poker instead. He moves on to play some blackjack, and I get an immediate seat at the must move table.


Bellgio 5/10

In the span of my first 10 hands, I pick up AK/QQ and AA. The AK hand was totally straightforward and nothing worth noting.

I played the QQ hand against a ~30 year old super-aggro woman who had an Army green Castro hat on, with her hair pulled back into two stubby pigtails. She claimed to have "flown in all the way from Breckinridge, Colorado!" and she fancied herself a bit of a player. She seemed really keyed up, and was trying her best to project a LAGtard image. Lot's of chatter, lots of announcements when she was raising, and "OK EVERYONE! I'M STRADDLING!" you know the drill.... Throughout the game, I notice she seems to be either working with, or just "with" the big/tall guy who was previously sitting to her left, but changed seats and is now sitting on my left. He was short-stacked, and I saw him make a few questionable plays. Regardless, I wasn't too concerned.

Folded around to her in LP, and Castro raises to $40. I find Q[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] Q[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] in the CO and pop it to $120, folded back to her and she calls.

I am watching her as the flop comes out, and she's staring directly at me. Without breaking eye contact, she checks. I consider raising without looking at the board, but decide that's probably a bad idea, and I look down, happy to see the 4[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]9[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]2[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] flop. I bet $150 and she folds.

<font color="red">Not particularly-interesting hand:</font>

Game is proving itself to be very limpy.

4 limptards to me on button, I find J[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]J[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img], and flat call, like a weak-passive, set-mining douche. Seemed to make sense at the time, but in retrospect, not ideal.
SB limps, BB shoves $340.
I get the distinct sense he's just trying to pick up the limps, but I haven't been at the table very long and haven't seen him play any hands. Folded around to me and I call. SB folds. BB says "Well, I'm [censored]." and tables AQ. Flop is J44 and my hand is good.

<font color="red">Semi-interesting hand:</font>

Middle-aged woman who has been folding a lot raises in MP to $40 with $800 behind, it folds around, and I call on the button with 7[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]8[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] SB and BB fold and we're heads up.

Flop comes 6[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] 9[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]
Woman bets $50. I call.
Turn is 4[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]

Woman is staring at the board, thinks for a few seconds, and bets $50. I get the sense she doesn't know exactly why she's betting, so I call, planning to take a stab on the river if it makes sense.

River is 9[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]

Woman continues staring blankly at the board, doesn't check her hole cards, and checks.

I quietly bet $150, and she mucks.


<font color="red">Boring AA hand:</font>

4 limpers to me, and I decide to pop it to $120(!?) in an attempt to make it look like I was trying to punish the limpers and avoid seeing a flop. Since I had been pretty active since sitting down, I was hoping someone would think I was out of line- but of course everyone folds. Probably not awful awful, but I'm not totally stoked about it.

I get moved to another table, and manage to get seated between two Hispanic guys who have decided to go to war with each other on each hand. They are talking a lot of [censored] to each other, and I end up leaving because I don't like the texture. The must move table was a totally different and much better game.

Sam Farha's brother was at the table for a bit. I played with him last year, and he was a maniac then, and seemed to be donking it up this time as well. And if anyone knows him, a local pro named Gary(?) was there again too. Nice guy, thin-build, thinning brown hair, red sweatshirt. I had played with him last year over the course of a few days.

Our other friends arrive around 11, and we decide to play some craps. I'm a craps virgin, and proceed to lose around a grand in about 10 minutes. "[censored] craps."

Ceaser's MTT

Get to bed late, and wake up around 10 on Friday and register for the noon $330 Deepstackament at Ceaser's. Game was totally straightforward. 7 hours in, I end up finding AJ in the BB with ~8x in my stack, and jam over LP raiser who shows JJ. I miss of course, and finish in 16th out of 45 or so. Rigged.

Nobu

We go the Palms for our 9pm reservation at Nobu. We opt for the "Chef's Choice" for 4 and a 1L bottle of sake. The food was phenomenal, per usual. However, the Australian Kobe was not particularly good, and left all of us a little disappointed. There were a few hot women floating around, but nothing over an 8. Meh. Tab comes and it's almost $900. Server tells us the credit card machine is down, so they have to call the card in by hand- and there is a long line in front of us. Since it was going on a corporate card, we had to sit around for about 20 minutes with our thumbs up our asses, while growing increasingly impatient. Good food, but a bad way to end the experience.

Spearmint Rhino (aka FRIGHT NIGHT)

We grab a limo outside the Palm and head over to the Rhino. On our way there, friend #1 complains of stomach pain. Friend #2 complains of stomach pain as well. I tell them to "Stop acting like bitches." when all of the sudden, I get wracked with stomach pain too. It was as if there was a knife-wielding midget in my stomach trying to stab his way out. Holy nuts.

We roll up to the Rhino and I pay the cover for everyone. "It's on me." I say. Little did I know, it would be the worst play I would make during the entire trip.

To say that the "women" were disappointing would be an understatement. I don't think they could have made the place any darker if they tried, even though I wish they could have. Friend #1 and I are immediately assaulted by a woman who basically looks like this:




She stands between us, grabs both of our pee-pees simultaneously and says "OK gentleman, who wants a dance? Let's go." Shocked by her appearance and aggression, as well as the MMF genital triangle that she had now completed, I muttered a quiet "No thanks." and tried to back away. Sadly, I was up against the wall, and had nowhere to go. She gives me a forceful pinch gets closer and says "Why are you so uptight?" and I think "Uhhh, because I don't like having shemales touch my junk?" but Instead I say "I just got here and really need a drink, sorry." The skank-harpy muttered something about my sexuality, released her grip, and moved on. Thank you Jesus.

We continue to press our way to the back of the club, hoping and praying that the talent would improve as we went deeper. Friend #2: "We have to keep going. It can't get any worse, can it?"

It did.

I don't know exactly WTF was going on, but I guarantee you this: If someone had suddenly flipped the lights on, the place would have cleared faster than a buttered anvil through a baby's grip. There were maybe 2 girls out of the 40 or so that were above a 7. And even that's being generous.

We retreated to the corner of the bar, to reevaluate the situation, when I was approached by a young, friendly girl who asked if I wanted a dance. I declined because my friends wanted to bail already, and would have left me behind. She cheerfully said "No problem," and left, parting with a curious "You smell good," and a smile. I almost wanted to give her a few hundred for being cute enough to not scare the living piss out of us.

After less than 15 minutes, we decided to make our way to the door, when one of my friends is grabbed. We leave him behind, fearing we couldn't save him. We make it outside, and he appeared a few seconds later saying "Can we please get the [censored] out of here?"

I'm telling you, if you take all of the women that you work with, and make them put on lingerie, there is a very good chance they would be better looking.

We head back to the Bellagio, and play more craps and try to forget what had just happened. I drop more money.

Saturday

We all sleep in, and meet up for the Bellagio buffet. The food was good... and we decide to head over to the Wynn to do some shopping, and play some games.

Wynn uncapped 5/10NL

Friend #3 decides to join me for some 5/10. He's a decent casual player- has never read a book, but he's very intelligent and holds his own. Unfortunately, he has little to no experience with deepstack play. They end up starting a new table for us, and we buy-in for $1000 each. 3 other players sit down- one of whom is the LAGgy girl who "just flew in from Breckinridge, Colorado!" I see her boyfriend/partner/friend is with her, but he's not in the game. She sits down, and we get the cards in the air.

<font color="red">Spew(?) hand:</font>

Four hands in, young guy with ~$1000 behind pops to $40 from UTG+1, folded to me on button with A[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]J[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]. I call.
Flop comes A[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img]Q[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]9[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]
He bets $70. I decide to find out where I am at, and raise to $230.

He proceeds to give a speech: "Are you serious? Do you have a set of fives? Man, that would suck. This is one of those hands that's just sick. It's like I'm destined to lose everything this week. God damn. OK, I'm all in...."

He then flashes his cards to Castro, sitting on his right.

Uhhhhh. "Good speech..." I say, and fold.

He mucks, and says "If you had AK you just made one hell of a laydown, but I think you had AJ." Castro chimes in with "If I had his hand, I would have shoved without the speech, and taken all of your chips."

He claims later to have had AQ.

<font color="red">Friend #3 loses $900</font>

My friend pops it to $60 from EP, folded to an elderly skinny Texan in a cowboy hat who calls in CO, everyone else folds.

Flop comes J[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]T[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img]

Friend bets $150, and texan turbo shoves $1500. Uh oh. My friend thinks for a few seconds and calls. I say to him "Man, I hope you have AQ, because he sure as [censored] does." My friend tables JJ for a set, Texan tables AQ. Turn and river brick, my friend is busto, and I decide to cash out because my friend doesn't want to rebuy. He asks me after how he is supposed to fold in that spot, and then says at least he's glad he lost to the Texan, and "not the irritating cokehead from Colorado."

We meet friend #2 at a $50 blackjack table. His dealer is easily the funniest dealer I've ever met in Vegas, and most certainly deserves a raise. She was black, and was telling the table that "all white people look the same to her" because all we do is "sit down, lose money, and complain." She then asked my friend if his wife picked out his clothes for him, because can't understand why an adult man would voluntarily wear a pink shirt in Las Vegas. Touché. In between all of this patter, she was goading people into betting more, and telling them they needed to grow some balls and stop playing like scared little babies.

Dinner at Nine

We head over to the Palm for dinner at Nine. We hang out by the bar watching the eye-candy, and eventually get seated next to a table of about 15 smoking-hot girls who were there as part of a bachelorette party. Since we are all married with kids, we decided against sending them a few bottles of champagne, although we did discuss it.

Moon &amp; Playboy Club

We head over to the line for Moon, and decide we don't want to wait in the 3-abreast, 100 foot line. We grab the host and he says he'll let us jump for $75 a person. We pay, and head up top. The crowd is homely, poorly-dressed, and rhythm-less. The only upside was a blonde dancer up on a box that I instantly fell in love with. I considered how I could explain to my daughter that she "Had a new mommy.," and tried to convince myself that my wife would not only understand, but approve. [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

We head down to the Playboy Club- watch some old dude playing $1000 a hand Blackjack on absolutely insane run, bitch about the music (Bel Biv Devoe? Nice hand, DJ), then head back upstairs to see if the scene has improved. It hasn't, so we head downstairs and play some 21.

I finish up about $400.

We head back to the Bellagio, and I proceed to donk off around a grand at Blackjack and craps.

Sunday morning - Bellagio 5/10NL

My friends have a table at the sports book, but I decide to play poker and try to earn some of my money back.

I get a seat right away, and end up donking off ~$300 with an ill-advised river raise bluff. I forget the particulars, but it ends with a 3 flush hitting on the river, Asian girl to my right betting $125, and me raising her to $325 with air. She tanks, stares at me for about a minute, and then quietly raises all-in. I muck, of course. Before she leaves, she asks me what I had. I lie and say "a small flush." and she says "NO WAY! I had 3 of a kind! I can't believe I pushed you off a flush!" I tell her she made a very good bet. She says that "replaying the hand, I just couldn't put you on the flush, and thought you were bluffing." Note to self: you are easy to read.

<font color="red">AA vs. KK</font>

I find A[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]A[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] UTG+1, and raise to $50. Folded to LP who raises to $150. Folded back to me. I ask which one of them raised, and he says confidently "I did." I think for a bit... he's acting pretty confident. So I peel 4 $100 bills from my roll and 5 red chips, and stick them in saying "raise." He shoves, and I call with my remaining ~$600. He shows K[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]

I say "Don't worry man- here comes your king."

Flop comes: K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]4[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]9[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]
He yells "Yes!" and stands up.
MP says "Man, you hit the case king. I folded KJ." Awesome. That makes me feel even better.
Turn is the J[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]
River is the merciful 2[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]

"Thank you sweet baby raptor christ jesus."

<font color="red">Quads over boat</font>

Same villain as above. He raises in LP to $50, and I call on the button with 7[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]8[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]

Flop comes: 7[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img]8[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img]9[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]
Villain bets $100, and I call.
Turn is the 7[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]
Villain checks, I check
River is the 7[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]
Villain bets $150. I raise to $450, he folds an 8 face up. Woopsie.
Does anyone else bet this differently on the end?

<font color="red">JJ vs. same guy</font>

Same villain again. Since I've taken quite a bit of his money now, I get the distinct sensation he wants to take some of it back, and decide to play cautiously against him.

He raises to $40 in LP, and I call in position with J[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]J[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]
Flop comes 4[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]5[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]T[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]
Villain bets $60, I sense something is fishy, and just call.
Turn is 9[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img]
Villain checks, I check behind.
River is 3[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]
Villain bets $150. I call.


Villain tables QQ. "Phew." Table starts talking about how I slipped the noose, and wonders how I didn't lose more. I didn't have an answer for them, so I just shrugged.


Brandi appears

At the risk of even mentioning her and bringing out the trolls... the infamous Brandi Rose sits down at the table with a stack. All of of the guys at the table instantly start checking her out. I was pleasantly surprised to find she is much more attractive in person than the pictures would lead you to believe. She sits her stack down, and immediately leaves to get food or something, leaving the guy two seats to my left asking "Who is that girl? Does anyone know who she is?" I had of course, already emailed Cha59 with the subject "Brandi Hawbaker at my 5/10 table," and said to the guy. "I know who she is." He asks if I know if she is single. I say "I don't know." and he says "Well, I just want to know if I can hit on her." I say "Well, I think you should give it a shot," hoping that I had just lit the fuse on a dramabomb.

"How do you know her?" he asks. "I can't really say. It's kind of inappropriate for me to say anything, but word on the street is that David Sklansky is coaching her in tournaments. She was involved in a bit of drama on the net. That's all I can say." The guy wouldn't relent, so I handed him my Blackberry, showed him my outgoing message to Cha, and said "Google that name." He types it into his iPhone, and I watch as his eyes go saucer-wide and he mouths "whoa." His iPhone is passed around the table, as everyone looks at her boobie pics and starts asking me more questions. I refuse to answer anything more. Meta game, baby!

<font color="red">TT vs BB</font>

A few hands later, I pick up TT on the button. Folded to me, and I raise to $40. BB, the guy who was asking me about Brandi, quietly raises to $250.

"Buddy, WTF are you doing? I have a real hand here. Do you have AK you dumb donkey?" He is trying his best not to laugh and I say. "Come on dude. I totally hooked you up with the info on your special lady friend, and now you are treating me like this? Where's the love DAWG?" He starts to laugh, unable to maintain his composure. He says "I'm really embarrassed by this raise. I can't tell you what it is, but I can tell you it was a bad bet." I fold TT face up and say "You owe me. You'd better show." He refuses to show the cards, mucks and claims "AK". I told him "nice hand," and thanked him for having the decency to lie to my face. He laughs.

Brandi returns, and the entire table is trying their hardest to pretend they weren't just checking out her pics on the internet. Everyone is eyeballing the other with knowing "LOL!!11one" glances. The guy who asked me about her tries to chat her up a few times, and fails.

She seemed to play a straightforward game. At one point she showed 7[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img]8[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] that she raised from MP. She wasn't involved in any big hands while she was at our table.

My friends wander out of the sportsbook, and check out my table from the rail. Friend #3 sees Brandi and mouths "Wow." I go over to the rail and talk to him briefly, giving him the Cliff's Notes of the Captain Tom story, and I tell him to Google it. He does, and for the next 10 minutes proceeds to stand at the rail, reading, and explaining everything to my other two friends in a hushed tone. They circle around, check her out from all angles, friend #2 shrugs, and then head back into the book.

Brandi asks for a table change, and leaves. I have a flight to catch, and decide it's time to cash out.


I finished up +$2600 for a little over 12 hours of poker. I was down a little more than that in table games / entertainment. Overall, a good poker experience, but a fairly lame Vegas trip

I can only stand Vegas for about 48 hours before I want to stick a gun in my mouth. It's fine in small doses, but I can't tell you how gross I think it is to see degenerates losing money they can't afford to part with. At 2am on Saturday, I watched in amazement as a couple wheeled their ~10month old, wide-awake baby through a smoke filled casino in a stroller, only to have the the dad stop at the blackjack table. Are you kidding? Do you hate your child?

Having been there for almost 4 days, I grabbed my bags, headed to the airport, and thankfully, flew home.

[SenatorKevin]

Yeah, I highly doubt Anne had just flown in from Breckenridge. She's been living at Wynn for months now. Hard to believe she's not busto by now. Good read.

[Paulie Walnuts]

That's funny I was in Vegas for 5 weeks in October 2006 and that lady was there at the Wynn a few times I was.

[JJT]

Nice TR, but it seems to me that going to a place called "Spearmint Rhino" looking for beautiful girls isn't the best idea.

[Paulie Walnuts]

[ QUOTE ]
Nice TR, but it seems to me that going to a place called "Spearmint Rhino" looking for beautiful girls isn't the best idea.

[/ QUOTE ]

Either you my friend have the highest standards ever or went to the Rhino on the worst night of all time. I have been there plenty and have been surrounded by beautiful women for the most part each time. I have pretty high standards myself. Otherwise great TR.

[octaveshift]

[ QUOTE ]
Yeah, I highly doubt Anne had just flown in from Breckenridge. She's been living at Wynn for months now. Hard to believe she's not busto by now. Good read.

[/ QUOTE ]

She used the "just flew in" line so often that it was clear to me that she hadn't.

I guess she gets people to pay her off with her "Look how LAG I am!" show.

[octaveshift]

[ QUOTE ]

Either you my friend have the highest standards ever or went to the Rhino on the worst night of all time. I have been there plenty and have been surrounded by beautiful women for the most part each time. I have pretty high standards myself. Otherwise great TR.

[/ QUOTE ]

Buddy, I can't tell you how disappointed we were, especially after all of positive things I had read on the forums.

We went to Scores last year, and all agreed that the women were much better-looking, overall.

One of the other possibilities- it was really crowded, and most of the hot girls were already with clients, leaving the busted-up scrippas behind to fight for scraps?

*shrug*

[Paulie Walnuts]

"One of the other possibilities- it was really crowded, and most of the hot girls were already with clients, leaving the busted-up scrippas behind to fight for scraps."

The most likely possibility. Especially if it was a Friday or Saturday, all the degens must've had them for private parties or whatnot. My first night ever in the Rhino I dropped 3 Gs and I was by myself. Never planned on spending that much but met a few smokin hot ones and next thing you know it's 6 in the morning and i'm outta cash. Man what a night. I wouldn't give up yet you might have better luck next time.

[SenatorKevin]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Yeah, I highly doubt Anne had just flown in from Breckenridge. She's been living at Wynn for months now. Hard to believe she's not busto by now. Good read.

[/ QUOTE ]

She used the "just flew in" line so often that it was clear to me that she hadn't.

I guess she gets people to pay her off with her "Look how LAG I am!" show.

[/ QUOTE ]

She's a character for certain. Playing J3o is well within her opening range. Apparently people still pay her off if she's still playing there. Good for her I guess. *shrugs*

[swope]

o this tr is gold, such pure and unrelenting gold.

thank you.