Dating a poker pro- From the perspective of a non-playing girlfriend

[OnYourBike]

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Can u give some details abwt yourself plz, like what games you play, site, when u went pro, how much you make per month/year? abit personal but its hard to relate to what she is saying not knowing how much money you make.

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Wasn't sure I should respond to this. I feel the thread is going off course. So one response only. Then back to the original topic.

Most of my income is from sports betting not poker. Poker I usually play 10-20 or 20-40 limit except Tuesdays when I either play in a NL game or a 50-100 limit. Online I play 5-10 / 10-20 limit between Feb-Aug. The rest of the year I play 1-2 to 5-10 limit.

I started in the early 90s and got better every year. Not sure when I went pro. The amount of money involved was enough that I'd consider myself pro in 97. I graduated law school in 99 so when I turned down my articling position I was committed to this as a career. So definitely pro by 00.

How much is something I never answer. My usual answer is more than a paperboy and less than Bill Gates. I don't like to talk about specific numbers. I drive a Porsche, my rent is $2700/month, I own a condo paid for in cash on the Mediterranean. Based on that you should have some context.

Now back to the original topic. I didn't mean to derail this. The point of my original post was to simply say that as long as the GF / wife benefits from the poker playing she won't complain. I just bought by Gf a $1900 Prada coat and a $850 Burberry coat because she couldn't decide which she liked better. How can she then turn around and tell me to get a job?

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No wonder you talk about poker being easy playing 20/40 limit. You kill me.

[golfnutt]

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It isn't even that they want them, Lots of people convent luxury items. Growing up in a middle income household I always wanted nicer things than what my family could afford. Had I gone off and achieved a $75k/year income I would have been happy. But once you go and start experiencing the lifestyle possible from a much larger income you can't go back to living off $75K and still be happy.

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I agree. Money doesn't buy happiness, but lack of money makes for incredible sadness. Especially when you have had it. Hard to start over at ground zero.

My friend has lost all concept of working for money. And he has gotten himself into a bigger hole every month with no end in sight. Plus, he has no desire to work 50 hours a week at an office job for what he deems to be little pay.

Gambling (which is what day-trading really is) has devoured his soul -- perhaps permanently.

[rbnn]

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My friend has lost all concept of working for money. And he has gotten himself into a bigger hole every month with no end in sight. Plus, he has no desire to work 50 hours a week at an office job for what he deems to be little pay.

Gambling (which is what day-trading really is) has devoured his soul -- perhaps permanently.

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I know someone like this too, ex-day trader.

[Thremp]

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Someone who plays poker needs to first establish that they have money before the topic of occupation comes up.

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This will land a ton of gold digging chicks.

[Black winter day]

My girlfriend is very supportive to the point that i can tell her about bad poker days and she will understand and tell me stuff like "you know you just got few unlucky beats/situations, you know you are good and will win in the long run".

She likes the game, i taught her to play and now she plays play money on several sites.When we are at home she often wants to play HU between us and really enjoys it.By the way, on our first date it turned out that one of her favorite movies is Rounders (i didn't tell her what i do before the date).

She even started reading HOH1 and already halfway through it.
She knows i play poker professionally and understands that it's a game of skill.

Recently i took her to a poker club, she sat near me and i explained to her about some moves and hands process, she liked the experience very much.

In 2 weeks we fly to Carribeans for Carribean Poker Classic, she will be there to support me.

I feel lucky that i met her and love her a lot.

[golfnutt]

What is so bad about a 'traditional job'? You get paid decently well if you have some smarts, you are building up transferable skills, you learn socialization skills, etc.

The one thing I notice in all these threads is that it appears that there aren't many poker pros that have kids. That changes the responsibility level by x times infinity. You aren't playing with your bankroll anymore but the family bankroll and if you go bust, they go bust.

These threads are always started by someone in their 20's who thinks being a poker pro (or whatever) has allowed them to escape the death sentence that has imposed on their friends.

A job ain't bad or a death sentence. It is a lot more than money. For those that work just for money, it can be sad, but there is much more to life. I like the people I work with and don't see it as drudgery.

/ramble over.

[Henry17]

Kids do change everything. I have very little interest in having children though so that works out. I also date girls that are much younger than me so they are not really keen on having children at that age either. I guess the hope is that by the time someone chooses to take on the responsibility of having children they should have enough in savings that going bust isn't a real concern.

I'm not sure if a job is a death sentence but a job does consume enough time that there is no way it wouldn't have a devastating impact on quality of life. Without working I am still falling behind on things I want to do. There is no way to give up 50 hours a week and not suffer for it.

[golfnutt]

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Kids do change everything. I have very little interest in having children though so that works out.

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That may change. We have all been certain about things in our life and then reversed course (or at least I have).

A job does take a lot of time. And it does infringe on just say going to India for two weeks because you feel like it.

I have had similar thoughts on why I work at a job as hard as I do. Life on this planet is limited and I am going to end up working for the grand majority of it.

But, there is a peace of mind that comes with security. And with twin boys on the way, I have to think of more than myself nowadays.

It is kind of neat to get away from that totally self-interest that consumed me. Hopefully I will become a better person for it.

[Mr_Pathetic]

some people need security, stable pay, piece of mind and some people need risk, adventure and never knowing what tomorrow may bring. thats just how people are. you do not have to work 50 hours a week for security either. get a phd you can just be a student for the rest of your life publishing crap no one reads for a steady paycheck. my mentor in graduate school was on campus two days a week for six hours and at home writing a book for the rest for a nice salary of 85k in lovely NC.

golfnut i don't mean to be a dick here but it sounds like you went down the road of pro poker player and failed and now you think everyone else will too but you are wrong. just because you like security, steady pay, and piece of mind for your upcoming kids doesn't mean others do too. my grandfather went broke in business for himself three times with four kids before he finally got it right with a service station convenience store which has been running since 1954 and has more then kept my dad's family well off. my grandfather use to always say that no matter what happens the most important thing is learning how to get up once you failed and try again.

also you cannot be scared to try something you feel is right either. i have a masters degree but i plan on not using and playing poker for now cause working for city government doesn't pay all that much even in the longterm. yes i may fail at playing poker and i may never make it to HSNL or MSNL for that matter but i bet i can make a decent living from it and when i get tired of it i guarantee i can go into business for myself whether it be a cstore like my family or a hotel, or electrical contracting with my brother in law. all that matters is that i will be able to get up when i fail and try again.

on the subject of kids, you can play poker and support a family it is not that difficult. it really is not much different then running your own business however some people cannot stomach that their entire family's future is riding on their sole ability to be successful. they had much rather settle for a steady paycheck in exchange for shifting that burden to someone else or some company which is all you are doing by working for someone or some company. i think this is what golfnut has come to realize in himself but he doesn't realize that this is not for everyone but it is for the vast majority. he is just on the wrong forum to find that majority.

i wish you all luck in your future endeavors whatever they may be. i also urge each of you to find what kind of person you are as identified in this post and make sure you take that route in your pursuit of life, liberty, and happiness.

Mr_Pathetic

[golfnutt]

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golfnut i don't mean to be a dick here but it sounds like you went down the road of pro poker player and failed and now you think everyone else will too but you are wrong.

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I have never been a poker pro. Have played for many hours and once I relied on it heavily while semi-employed. But the most I have ever won was $5k a month. I don't feel comfortable playing bigger stakes.

I have been 'following' poker for 18 years (geez, half my life!). I have seen these posts over and over and over and becoming a poker pro. Escalated during the online era. And I have personally known a few who have gone down that route, profited wildly, only to have a severe downturn and then go into serious depression.

It is only my dumb opinion that becoming a poker a pro in your 20's is super -EV. You are much better off getting a job for 10 years, developing a skill, a network, etc. and then take your shot when you have something to fall back on. It is not only that failed poker pros have nothing to fall back on, but their concept of money is incredibly skewed. Making $1,000 a week for having to be in an office for 40 hours a week sounds like hell for someone used to waking up whenever they want.

Of course, YMMV. And I don't wish failure on anyone in the world. It is just pure mathemtatics that most will fail.

Cheers