Lazymeatball goes to more Red Sox games: from the Bronx to the Fens (w

[Lazy Meatball]

Last Tuesday my friend Phil and I took a trip down to New York to see Daisuke pitch at Yankee Stadium. On the way down there a six pack of Labatt Blue was consumed, Also on the way down there we cut off some trucker when Phil didn’t realize the left lane was ending and we had to merge at the last second. Afterwards, that Trucker Dude got in front of us, crossed two lanes of traffic to take the same exit as us, then pulled over on the off ramp and started climbing out of his cab pointing at us in anger, as if he expected us to also pull over and fight him. Phil and I both found this very unprofessional for a trucker on the job. We found the parking lot outside the stadium to be pretty reasonable for $14, even if there were lots of spots taken up by smoldering hibachis left by thoughtless Yankee fans. Not nearly as many Red Sox fans around as there were in Baltimore, but still a few here and there.


We met up with our friend Bill and headed inside, his wife, Kelly, was running late from work so he would catch up with her later. We bought some ridiculous $9 Bud Lights and traversed the Upper Decks until we found our seats behind the left field foul poll and settled in. We had a decent view of the field and Kelly joined us later. The surrounding Yankee fans were actually friendly and intelligible as we discussed the merits of both teams young 2nd basemen.

Here's my patriotic picture


And this is me:
Youkilis
Pedroia

The peanuts at Yankee Stadium suck. Dice-K was pitching a decent but not great game for most of the night but the most nerve racking moment of the night was when I had to carry back four of those 12 or 16oz beers back to our seats traversing crowds and stairs in the process. I made it up to our row using one of those little cardboard trays they give you taking sips from all 4 beers as necessary to reduce spillage and successfully achieved the hand off to Phil so I could move in front of other patrons in the row. At this point the cardboard tray completely collapses in the middle sending about 2 and half beers pouring into the stands, soaking some executive looking guy’s shoes and completely saturating some chick’s Jeter jersey. Phil’s only reaction was to say “I can’t believe that just happened” whereas I was so traumatized I immediately ran to the men’s room out of fear, guilt, shame and embarrassment to gather paper towels. I gave the towels to those affected by the spill and fortunately they weren’t particularly upset at the incident, well, not nearly as upset as I was at having just watched $23 worth of beer spill onto the concrete.

The game was close but the Bronx Bombers prevailed 5-3 thanks to a 2 run shot by Damon as well as some relief help by that f*cking c*nt Joba and Mo. We got some street side hotdogs after the game and drove off into Connecticut.

Oh, I also saw this:
Red Sox chick
Chicks in skirts1
Chicks in skirts2
Port O'Potty with Stadium in back left

[kipin]

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Oh, I also saw this:
Red Sox chick
Chicks in skirts1
Chicks in skirts2


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Uhh... creepy?

[KilgoreTrout]

You, sir, are the master of the perv cam.

[JasonK]

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You, sir, are the master of the perv cam.

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Where's the upskirts?

[Lazy Meatball]

In celebration of Labor Day Phil and I took a trip to Fenway Park to see our best in the league Red Sox take on the Toronto Blue Jays. I grabbed a 12 pack of Miller Lite for the ride up to Boston and we pregamed at a cozy little spot on Brighton Ave called The Gray Impala. For the record, ‘The Gray Impala’ is just Phil’s car where we sat and drank beer while watching BU freshmen girls walk by. After that we wrapped a couple beers in some packing tissue paper for the walk in to Kenmore Sq. Apparently I hadn’t packed my beer sufficiently as it slipped through my hands in a crosswalk and I had to run back to the car to get another one. We met up with Phil’s union buddies at Pizzeria Uno’s and they bought us each a 22oz Bud light. We also met up with Steve, some random union webmaster guy who Phil said he’s give a ticket too. Outside Uno’s we met Phil’s friend Melinda who would complete our foursome as we headed into the park.
Melinda and I:

Upon questioning she had never heard of the establishment known as ‘The Gray Impala’ despite living in Boston all her life.

Since we had standing room only tickets we moved into the park a bit earlier than usual and settled along the first base line behind section 15 which gave a good view of the field except for the occasional fly ball. I got beers and Italian sausages for us to get started. Around the 1st or 2nd inning Phil noticed a lonely beer underneath the seat in front of us that we determined the owner to have forgotten about. I made a subtle move to sit in the empty seat behind it, untie and retie both my shoes, grab the beer, return to our standing spot to distribute among our cups and discard the evidence in a near by trash can.

The Lonely Beer:

Phil spotted a female vendor he had seen a year before and showed her a picture of themselves he had taken on his phone the year prior, so I took another picture of them here.

(Phil prefers to keep his identity secret)

We made friendly banter among fellow patrons and Phil seemed to be chatting up some broad on our left. He offered to give her some room to stand next us under the condition that he would stand behind her in an intimate manner. When she rejected his offer Phil remarked to some guy she came to the game with “If you were me you would have tried the same thing” to which the guy replied “Well, I wouldn’t with my own sister.” Everyone laughed after that. Upon further inquisition the broad in question revealed that she was only 16 years old, after which I made a Chris Hansen reference.
Here’s a picture of me in front of the field, the 16 year old with cleavage can be seen in light blue in the bottom left.


At some point in the game Phil escorted this quiet polite old couple to their seats as they were lost and too afraid to ask people in their row to stand up for them. Phil used to be a vendor at Fenway so he knows the park well. Later in the game Phil also offered his services to some cougars who he also escorted to their seats. The brunette seemed really drunk and slutty and took a liking to me and Phil. She must have been late 30’s at best but still had a tramp stamp.

Here’s Phil and some older broads.

[KilgoreTrout]

Lots going on in that last pic. Sleepy chubster on the left, "boy" palming toddler's head on the upper right, and YIKES! Get that broad to a dentist STAT!

[asofel]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Oh, I also saw this:
Red Sox chick
Chicks in skirts1
Chicks in skirts2


[/ QUOTE ]


Uhh... creepy?

[/ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]

Lazy Meatball
Carpal \'Tunnel


Reged: 05/30/03
Posts: 4599
Loc: Night Shift


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[Toro]

You do know that Lite beer has less alcohol, don't you?

[Lazy Meatball]

I should also mention that as today was Labor Day, it was official AFL-CIO day at Fenway Park, and Mass AFL-CIO pres Bobby Haynes threw out the ever popular ceremonial second pitch. Haynes is the same guy Sen. Ted Kennedy told to take our picture two years ago at the Mass Dems Convention because he “wasn’t doing anything” as Kennedy said. In honor of the event I wore the I.B.E.W. shirt I bought while we were in Las Vegas this past June.


So somehow Phil got incredibly inebriated at this game. He did take an entire paper towel roll from the bathroom and proceeded to roll it down the aisle as some sort of drunken version of a red carpet whenever he walked down the stairs.
Note the paper towel trail in the stairway

The cougars seemed very impressed with this so we sat down at a couple of empty seats next to them. At some point after a great Red Sox play we were all high fiving and Phil smacked the blonde cougar’s ass and when she turned around her and the guy she was with both thought it was me. After waiving my hands like an air traffic controller to say it wasn’t me I received some dirty looks and then I left.

Here’s a pic of the four of us:

Note Steve in the top left looking completely miserable. We pretty much ignored him most of the game and he never paid for the ticket. Despite that picture he seemed to enjoy himself anyway. After what we thought was a 10-1 blow out the Jays came back to make it a close one so we got to move down into the stands and watch Papelbon close it out.


The scoreboard after the Blue Jays ralllied back, just terrible 6th inning

After the game Phil and I went to the Jap place (Phil insists on calling it 'that Jap Place') in Kenmore square to sober up. We sat down, I ordered a Sapporro and then the karaoke mic was passed to Phil who finished out some Britney Spears song.



There was one table of a few young women and presumeably someone’s parents who seemed to love us. Phil called some older middle aged blonde women over and told her to sit in his lap. She responded that her husband who was with her would object. A really blurry pic of the older blonde chick Phil liked

I then sang Backstreet Boys “I want it that way” and brought down the house while singing right in various women’s faces while their friends took pictures of me, including a couple from Dallas that had come up to see Jimmy Buffet at Foxboro.

While there I got a pork teriyaki dish and Phil ordered some sort of rolls and a sashimi platter which were delicious. The raw fish seemed to sober Phil up enough to drive me back to my house in central MA where we called it a night.
Pork terriyaki

Links to past threads:
Mass Dem Convention 2006
NYC in July for Mets games (this post is too good to only have responses from mods)
My Baltimore trip

[Lazy Meatball]

[ QUOTE ]
You do know that Lite beer has less alcohol, don't you?

[/ QUOTE ]

I prefer Miller Genuine Draft, but Phil is on Atkins.