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#251
10-28-2007, 02:37 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
last night we're drinking and playing kings. someone draws a 10 for categories and my buddy ryan picks mls teams. since nobody cares about soccer, the round is over in like 3 people when one of my friends says "the wildfire." friend says that the wildfire are a team, but he forgets what city. everyone starts trying to figure out what city it would be... ryan- la? friend 1- chicago? me with a huge smile on my face- san diego? silence. felt like an ass. (btw it was the chicago fire) [/ QUOTE ] rofl.Thats gold! i dont get people being offended by jokes like that. 
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#252
10-28-2007, 02:53 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
last night we're drinking and playing kings. someone draws a 10 for categories and my buddy ryan picks mls teams. since nobody cares about soccer, the round is over in like 3 people when one of my friends says "the wildfire." friend says that the wildfire are a team, but he forgets what city. everyone starts trying to figure out what city it would be... ryan- la? friend 1- chicago? me with a huge smile on my face- san diego? silence. felt like an ass. (btw it was the chicago fire) [/ QUOTE ] Granted it was in the 1800s but the Fire are named after a fire in Chicago that was significantly worse than the fires going in California now.
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#253
10-28-2007, 09:51 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
I'm waiting tables in Ontario and in the fall we get all these Americans coming up and hunting/fishing - they all tip amazing. so these 4 American guys come in and take a seat at the semi-casual restaurant I was at. these guys are total American hunters - overweight, big manly men. they're ordering rounds of Bud and JD and finally they order food. guy 1: I'll have bla bla bla bla guy 2: yeah make it 2 guy 3: so, what about your pizza? me: what would you like to know? guy 3: so how big is it about? me: 12 inches - about 8 inches more than you're used to guys: ..... [/ QUOTE ] That was hilarious! A+
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#254
10-28-2007, 11:13 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
So, I'm at the Bucs/Jaguars game today and they do a feature on an Asian cheerleader on the jumbotron. The audio is running about a second and a half behind the video.
The guy next to me says that it looks like a bad 1960's sci-fi movie from Japan. And then , in his best Japanese accent, starts yelling: "Rook out, Godzeeeera is coming, Godzeeeeera is coming" Both of the wives were appalled. I laughed my ass off.
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#255
10-28-2007, 11:57 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
This story happened in HS about 12 years ago when Mortal Kombat first came out. Our health teacher told us some woman from social services was coming in the next day and she expected us to be on our best behavior. The next day, this woman comes in and shows us a video on physical abuse. The video shows some guy coming home to his wife and 2 kids; he starts an argument w/ the wife. Evenually he starts hitting her in front of the kids and she falls on the ground and he starts kicking her in the head. It was actually pretty graphic, which surprised me. Anyway, just as he's about to stomp on her head, the social woman pauses the video to talk about it; I say, "Finish Her!". About 1/2 the class gasps in shock, the other half are trying not to laugh. My teacher got pissed and sent me to the principal's office. [/ QUOTE ] I can't stop laughing at this.
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#256
10-29-2007, 12:00 AM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
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A guy was telling me this heartfelt story about his girlfriend getting an abortion and I said "You child murdering bastards.. you are going to burn for that one" He just looked at me funny with a sense of pain and suffering in his eyes, and I said "Hmmm too soon, right?" [/ QUOTE ] Wow, thats cold.
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#257
10-29-2007, 12:18 AM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
About 2 years ago in a restaurant with my G/F, waiter comes over to take the order, I ask him what the soup of the day is he says "pea and ham", I say "I'll have the ham", he just looks at me blankly.
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#259
10-29-2007, 12:53 AM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
About 2 years ago in a restaurant with my G/F, waiter comes over to take the order, I ask him what the soup of the day is he says "pea and ham", I say "I'll have the ham", he just looks at me blankly. [/ QUOTE ] LOL
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#260
10-29-2007, 10:25 AM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
So, I'm at the Bucs/Jaguars game today and they do a feature on an Asian cheerleader on the jumbotron. The audio is running about a second and a half behind the video. The guy next to me says that it looks like a bad 1960's sci-fi movie from Japan. And then , in his best Japanese accent, starts yelling: "Rook out, Godzeeeera is coming, Godzeeeeera is coming" Both of the wives were appalled. I laughed my ass off. [/ QUOTE ] I thought this was hilarious.
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