Like Brian Townsend

[SixBillionMarks]

Hi BBV

I dropped out of college at the end of May to become a professional poker player, because I'm such hot [censored] and jobs are for stable people, and hot [censored] is anything but stable

In my first month as a pro, June, I won about $3,200 including rakeback

Below are my results for July



$5.50

I decided that if I was only going to win $5.50 on the month, then whatever I buy with that $5.50 is going to be the most tricked out baller THING in that category. So me and a friend pooled our resources and went 50-50 on a sandwich from Quizno's



Until Wolfgang Puck starts [censored] diamonds into all his sandwiches, a Quizno's sandwich will be pretty much the most baller sandwich money can buy as far as I'm concerned. And one half tastes just as good as... one, does

The sandwich was really good and everything, but I'm left wishing I could have bought two, or even three of them with my winnings from July

I entered a very deep and contemplative state after eating that sandwich. I started thinking about the month's shortcomings, the hopes I had, the dreams. The money that could have been, if only I could play more like Brian Townsend.

I play nothing like Brian Townsend. I'm pretty much the tightest player at whatever given table I'm sitting at, without exception, and I always have at least 40 buy-ins backing my play.

That's pretty much the exact opposite of Townsend, right?

My perception of how Brian Townsend plays:

1. Never play with more than 6 players in the game, lots of heads-up and 3 and 4 handed, and at most 6 players

2. Sail up into the highest stakes on a 10 buy-in bankroll, moving back down if you drop below 7 buy-ins at whatever stake you're playing

3. Never ever limp preflop, not even from the small blind. If I'm going to VPIP preflop, it's going to be a raised pot

4. Play way looser than I have ever played in my entire life, throw away everything I know about preflop standards, and raise any hand that has any kind of merit whatsoever

VPIP 26 at a 5 or 6 handed table, with a PFR of 20

5. Contest c-bets like an insane person

For my play I will be using a 20-sided dice, and every time somebody c-bets and I have nothing, I'm going to roll that dice, and if I roll a 1 2 3 4 5 or 6, I'm raising

6. Play 4 tables at a time at most

7. Use PokerStove in mid-hand and trust what I think of the enemy's range

8. ?

9. Profit

It's do or die, folks. I either need to make fireworks happen or I need to go back to that [censored] hellhole full of wash-out loser professors and start waking up at 8am every day and all that horrible [censored] that no hot [censored] like Brian Townsend ever has to do

I'll be putting $1,000 into this and starting my journey at $100 NL, playing at least 3,000 hands every day. I'll move down to $50 NL if I drop $300, and I'll move up as soon as I have 10 buy-ins for the next level

If I lose $1,000, I'm withdrawing everything I have and going back to college as a mini-baller

So the question has been asked. Is my [censored] hot, or is my [censored] cold?

Time to take a spin on Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, bitches

Beat: Only won half a Quizno's sandwich this month
Brag: The sandwich was baller
Variance: What variance?

I'm looking at my clock and it says it's August. I'm starting right now, and if the thread is still open when I finish my sessions every day, I'll bump with a PT picture and a post

[jfish]

pretty nice sandwich honestly.

[flavio321]

good luck.

[LionelHutz00]

sn plz.

also, here's a chance to pimp one of my comics from the ga thread:

[Butcho22]

WoWoWoW this post sucks

[highhustla]

I like your brag (the sandwich) but not the ordered list.

[x] moving up to where they respect your raises

is the cliffs notes though, I believe

[dud_ber]

thats some good reading, u should start a blog

[highhustla]

lionel your sex fantasies are funny, your comics are apparently not [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

[2cards2come]

i liked the list

[paulcouto]

thread of the year?

op, i had 3.85cents in my stars acount and tried to work it to 1000. i worked it up to 28.85 and
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0.00
i swear, i would have transfered it to u if i saw this thread first. u r a true baller.