Dealing with idiots * Trip Report (stories/pet peeves, etc.)

[kibble420]

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What do you expect? You went to the mall, which is pretty much the official breeding ground of American idiots. This is like walking into a casino and going "wow there sure are a lot of gamblers here".

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winner!

[tdarko]

every single day it becomes more clear that cell phones only cause more problems than help, since the majority of people are too [censored] stupid to multi-task, why the [censored] did we invent the cell phone so we can ruin this world faster?

screw the little toot of a horn, i appreciate that you are a nice guy and all...but i lay on the horn and not let off and if she gives me the look she gave you i quickly assess whatever body faults it is she has and use them against her when i roll my window down and yell at her. next time maybe she won't be such an inconsiderate bitch.

i would vote for patrick, except i know that the suckerpunch law wouldn't work for me b/c some people piss me off so much that i wouldn't just hit them once, i would probably go overboard and abuse the law thus getting myself in trouble.

my favorite move for inconsiderate pricks is when someone moves from the middle lane into the right lane at a red light when you have to take a right on red and they aren't turning right but are in fact still going straight so there was no reason for them to move into the right lane. if its at night, i will turn on my brights and lay on my horn for the duration of the red light, if its during the day i will just lay on the horn the entire time.

my lord i hate people.

[DoubleTwentyOne]

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So as I'm driving there on a major highway a lady in the far right lane (it's like an 8 lane highway, 4 on both sides) decides she needs to take a left immediately and the fact she's 3 lanes in the wrong place doesn't phase her at all and she proceeds to cut across every single lane at 60 mph. Luckily there was no accident but the sheer idiocy of this caught my attention.


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My instinct tells me she was driving an SUV. I live in LA, and I don't have to mention how many soccer moms buy an SUV and immediately receive visions that they are the second incarnation of Michael Schumacher and their stupid Hummer has turned into the official Ferrari F1 car, complete with flawless handling and cornering abilities at 195 MPH. Which is why most of the time when I see an SUV on its roof, my heart generates a warm fuzzy feeling that the driver got exactly what they deserved.

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So I get to the mall parking lot and it's pretty crowded, which is fine, and when I get to the lane of parking spots I want to go to there is a car sitting there running.... just sitting there, not moving, not waiting on a spot, I eventually have it clear so I whirl around them and it's some moron lady on her cell phone apparently obilivious to the rest of the world.


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One time some sh*thead lady tried to pull this during Christmas shopping time! She must have really been into her conversation because I honked at her at least 10 times...and no response. Finally I decided a good old fashioned middle finger will get her attention, so I work my way around her to flip her off and the space between her car and the parked cars on her left side was so small my right mirror clipped and knocked her driver's mirror into a totally awkward position. I floored it while flipping her off with my left hand.

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So I start going down the lane of parking spots and some trailor park trash looking lady is walking in the middle of the road. I mean the DEAD middle to, so I can't even get around her. I'm a polite sort of guy so I don't start honking, I just nudge up close to her going slow hoping she'll get the idea "Oh I'm in the road, perhaps cars behind me need to use it" but she doesn't.

So after about 5-6 cars worth of traveling like this I let out a very gentle and quick toot on my horn, she then proceeds to turn around and looks at me like I'M crazy and slowly walks over to the side, lookign at me like I've HORRIBLY insulted her.


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Yeah I would've maintained a continuous honk until she got the f*ck out of my way, then I would've flipped her off and maybe yelled a nice 'f*ck you' or two.

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So I finally find someone pulling out of a spot and wait to take it. They proceed to back up 6 inches and stop, back up 6 more, stop, back up half way out and stop.... remaining stopped.... I notice then that the lady was fiddling around in the other seat with something.


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See above solution for the trailer park lady.

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So i walk to the entrace and there are these 2 doors that swing outward. A guy on his cell phone is standing directly in front of them and not moving at all, even though it's pretty darn clear I wanna use the door. So I kinda just stand there waiting and eventually am like "excuse me" and once again this guy looks at me like I've horribly insulted him and I'm just completely insane for wanting to use the door.


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I would use one of those 'world's loudest noise' airhorns then bitch-slapped his punk ass while he was reeling from his busted eardrum.

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I'm hungry so right away I go to the food court and get my little Chinese mall food lunch, and this food court has communal stations where you get your straws/napkins/etc.

So I go over to one of the stations and these two old cow ladys have decided this is the perfect place for a conversation. Once again I do the whole politely waiting thing, followed by "excuse me" nudging closer and they proceed to move all of 6 inches, forcing me to repeat myself and they generally look offended that I dare disrupt their conversation.


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See above solution for Mr. Cell Phone.

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So finally the point, what has happend to common courtesy in this world? I understand ultimately everyone is selfish but we all gotta live on the planet together. I'm by no means perfect but my parents have taught me just basic consideration for others.


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Since you can't really stop these idiots from being idiots, you can do your best to think of creative ways to put them in their place. In poker terms, at least you're making them pay dearly to draw out on you with some POS hand that they shouldn't have been playing in the first place.

[surfinillini]

why would you ever goto the mall...just order everything online like I do

[Mitch Evans]

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they aren't turning right but are in fact still going straight so there was no reason for them to move into the right lane. if its at night, i will turn on my brights and lay on my horn for the duration of the red light, if its during the day i will just lay on the horn the entire time.

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Wow, you take life a bit too seriously.

[4_2_it]

Patrick,

As an offshoot of your sucker punch program, I hope you would consider implementing a Kick-In-The-Nuts program. You have my vote.

[CORed]

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So I have the day off for President's Day and decide to swing by the mall, in a normal ok mood.

So as I'm driving there on a major highway a lady in the far right lane (it's like an 8 lane highway, 4 on both sides) decides she needs to take a left immediately and the fact she's 3 lanes in the wrong place doesn't phase her at all and she proceeds to cut across every single lane at 60 mph. Luckily there was no accident but the sheer idiocy of this caught my attention.


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What's your problem? Don't you realize that if she misses her turn she will have to go to the next intersection (or exit), turn around, and come back. That could take two or three minutes. Certainly avoiding that delay and the tablespoon full of gas that would be wasted is worth risking her life, you live, and the life of anybody who happens to be in her way.
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So I get to the mall parking lot and it's pretty crowded, which is fine, and when I get to the lane of parking spots I want to go to there is a car sitting there running.... just sitting there, not moving, not waiting on a spot, I eventually have it clear so I whirl around them and it's some moron lady on her cell phone apparently obilivious to the rest of the world.


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What? You expect her to find a parking place before she makes her call? That might take 30 seconds. Don't you realize that her time is more vlauble than yours or anyone else's?
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So I start going down the lane of parking spots and some trailor park trash looking lady is walking in the middle of the road. I mean the DEAD middle to, so I can't even get around her. I'm a polite sort of guy so I don't start honking, I just nudge up close to her going slow hoping she'll get the idea "Oh I'm in the road, perhaps cars behind me need to use it" but she doesn't.

So after about 5-6 cars worth of traveling like this I let out a very gentle and quick toot on my horn, she then proceeds to turn around and looks at me like I'M crazy and slowly walks over to the side, lookign at me like I've HORRIBLY insulted her.


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But the middle of the road is a much more pleasant place to walk than where you migh brush against one of those dirty parked cars. Can't you just drive at walking speed?
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So I finally find someone pulling out of a spot and wait to take it. They proceed to back up 6 inches and stop, back up 6 more, stop, back up half way out and stop.... remaining stopped.... I notice then that the lady was fiddling around in the other seat with something.

At this point I'm on non-poker related tilt and just fuming. I keep my cool waiting for this idiot to pull out of the spot and take it.


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You're so impatient. Just because it doesn't take you five minutes to get out of a parking space, you think everybody ought to be able to do it quickly.
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So i walk to the entrace and there are these 2 doors that swing outward. A guy on his cell phone is standing directly in front of them and not moving at all, even though it's pretty darn clear I wanna use the door. So I kinda just stand there waiting and eventually am like "excuse me" and once again this guy looks at me like I've horribly insulted him and I'm just completely insane for wanting to use the door.


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Well with any luck at all, the next time he does this somebody on the way out who's in a hurry won't see him and will knock him upside the head with the door. After this happens seven or eight times, maybe he'll figure out that's not such a good place to stand. Then again, maybe not.

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I'm hungry so right away I go to the food court and get my little Chinese mall food lunch, and this food court has communal stations where you get your straws/napkins/etc.

So I go over to one of the stations and these two old cow ladys have decided this is the perfect place for a conversation. Once again I do the whole politely waiting thing, followed by "excuse me" nudging closer and they proceed to move all of 6 inches, forcing me to repeat myself and they generally look offended that I dare disrupt their conversation.


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I'm sure they were talking about something really important, like who their neighbors are sleeping with. Couldn't you just wait half an hour for them to finish?
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So finally the point, what has happend to common courtesy in this world? I understand ultimately everyone is selfish but we all gotta live on the planet together. I'm by no means perfect but my parents have taught me just basic consideration for others.

Anyone have any thoughts or input on this? Is this the parents fault? The media/society? How do you deal with these people? Any stories?

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A few of my pet peeves:

Two people who know each other are driving in opposite directions on a residential street and want to talk, so they just stop in the middle of the street and roll down their windows, blocking it copmpletely in both directions.

Somebody is picking somebody up and honks to let them know they are there. Okay, I can live with this, but, the person they are picking up isn't ready and doesn't come out right away, so the one picking them up honks their horn every 10 seconds for the next 15 minutes. Hey, moron! If they're at home and not dead, they know you're there, and so does everybody else within two blocks. If they're not home or dead, continuing to honk your horn won't do any good.

[MowrMowr]

I've found if you equip your vehicle with one of these:

http://www.dieselairhorns.com/media/...lanche%202.WMV

people tend to move out of the way quicker.

[tdarko]

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Wow, you take life a bit too seriously.

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i get a kick at the idiots flipping me off b/c my brights are in their eyes and my horn is "embarrassing" them. its pretty funny actually.

i don't take life too seriously, but it doesn't mean that you can't try to teach a few lessons along the way.

[MrTrik]

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When I run for President in 2016 (the first year I'm eligible), I plan to incorporate the Citizen's Suckerpunch Program into my platform. Under this program, intelligent, level-headed citizens such as myself will be able to apply for the Citizen's Suckerpunch License (CSL). Anyone holding this license will have the right, nay, the responsibility to enforce the common laws of decency via a punch to the face of the offending person(s). That's it. You see an offense, you walk up to the person, punch him/her in the face, and be on with the rest of your day. That's it. No paperwork, no talking, no bitching, no fines/fees/other penalties. Just a crisp jack to the face and move on. I recommend you apply for your CSL as soon as the program is implemented.

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You'd get my vote Patrick.