Tales of Revenge

[r0eKY]

i killed a man once

[lucid75]

During my junior year in college, my roomates were partying at our house. I wouldn't have much of a problem with this, except my room, which was locked while I was gone, had been broken into and trashed. The smell of Natty Light was intolerable. I could tolerate them but, bottom line they were d-bags. I mean HUGE-LFO-loving-Abercrombie xxs t shirt wearing-popped-collared-douchebags. So, I got my dirtiest hippy friend to come over one day and he ran around their rooms rubbing his bare ass all over keyboards, remote controls, doorknobs etc. He then upper decked the toilets, and left. I smile a little inside whenever a doorknob was opened on the other side of the house.

I've now slept with 2 of their girlfriends. Sex was meh, but now they have herpes. jk.

Lol revenge-aments.

[sublime]

i was in a rehab and this dude in our room (like 6 of us) would snore like a mofo...we told him to get some of those strips and he was like no. i took a steaming poop in his suitcase the day he was leaving.

[dreq]

This has happened so long ago I am not sure what caused it. I think it was maybe spiking a drink with extra alcohol. I don't know what started the fight, but I know what finished it.

Senior year of college Easter Break. My friend Mich and I put a TV in the hallway of the second floor, Just outside Bob's bedroom door. We put in the tape of death, all three starwars films back to back to back. We systematically take a 4 foot pile of wall street journals that we have been saving for weeks. We crumble up each sheet of paper into a ball and toss it into his room. Using some plywood, we fill his room, completely. The last piece of plywood was put with a 2 foot gap at the top. After 2 plays through the tape the room was full.

Bob's mind was broken on Easter Monday.

[dreq]

Growing up there was a bully on the street named Jimmy. He was 5 years older than my dad. The revenge stories went back in forth till my father passed a way. As they got older they became more firendly, but still devious.

In the 70's or early 80's, my father and his friend walk into the Italian club with a live chicken. They prance around the bar and try to get the chicken to drink. Roots was on a bit before this and my father's friend is still called Chicken George for this. After about an hour drinking, they go outside and cut the chicken's head off and let it go inside Jimmy's car.

Fast forward till I'm 13. My parents throw a christmas eve party, which was very very wierd. But anyways Jimmy and his wife show up for the party. Fun times had by all.

About 10am my father hands me the keys to start the car. WOW.... never had this before. This is a golden moment for me. Thinking that I had enough respect from him to have the responsibility of turning on a car by myself.

Our garage has two bays and one exit door. I go out and try to lift the garage door. I fail. I fail again. I head back inside to tell my dad. He gets a bit frustrated and tell me to try again. I try and fail again to lift the door. Finally my father goes outside, and he cant lift it either.

We look through one of the side windows. Here Jimmy nailed two two by fours above each garage door and then locked the side door from the inside. We had to break the side window on the garage to get to the car.

[brandofo]

[ QUOTE ]
i killed a man once

[/ QUOTE ]
Brick, I've been meaning to talk to you about that. You should find yourself a safehouse or a relative close by. Lay low for a while, because you're probably wanted for murder.

[DMC0627]

A woman tried to steal my husband. I let her.

[React1oN]

[ QUOTE ]
We got a giant aluminum garbage can from the dining hall, filled it up with water, tipped it against his closed door (the doors all open in), knocked on his door and stepped back and enjoyed the show. It was dubbed "the torpedo" and it's one of my fondest memories ever.

[/ QUOTE ]LOL

[EMc]

When people take my clothes out of the dryer to place their clothes in there I usually take them out and either:

a. piss on them
b. put them back in on a warm cold cycle so they shrink

One time a girl knocked over my soap in the laundry room and then too my clothes out, I put hers back in and used all the soap she had in there (3/4 of a bottle) in the washer.

[wiper]

first roommate in college was a friend from home..

i started noticing pubic hairs stuck on my bar of soap in the shower...anyone that's ever had this happen, those bitches aren't easy to get off..

eventually, i confronted him:

me: you been using my soap?

him: yeah

me: why?

him: i dunno, i like it better than mine??

me: wtf..i've been finding pubic hairs all over them, you wash your balls with MY soap??

him: hahahahaha!

fast forward a week or so, classes were over, so i'm getting drunk playing mariokart 64. he had to leave for work, so it was just me..

went to piss for about the 10th time in 2 hours, and noticed his mouthwash. one of those 40oz industrial family-sized gigs, about 2/3rds full.

i filled it up about an inch.

for the next several weeks, i personally witnessed him gargle my piss at least 3 or 4 different times, and felt vindicated.