Official 10.00 to 100k thread

[Stake Monster]

Here is the recap of my adventure, for those who could not attend.

It was a rainy night, it was a cold night. In a bedroom full of ritz crackers and empty glasses was a man. His name was...Jerry. Jerry was a man of small stature but of very high standings in interweb hierarchy. Some would say he is a kind and generous man, but most would know him as the person who could always put a dent into someone's sorrows. He had very deep and digested values. He had such high standards that he had double standards. And finally, he was very well respected in the domain of engaging into wonderful interweb adventures.

On that cold and lonely night, Jerry told himself that it would be a special night. A night to remember, for once. He had been playing interweb poker for about 8 months now, and had been dwelling in the dark and slippery alleys of low limit poker. He had suffered a great deal at the hands of lesser, common, people. Quite often he would cry himself to sleep, hoping for a better tomorrow, a more profitable tomorrow where he could bathe in champagne and wash himself with the sweat of his terrified opponents. Those were Jerry's ambitions. He wanted to join the elite crowd, the lucky ones who could dance on the stars and break hearts every other day. It was a dream he had longed for so long, but every time he reached for that rainbow, someone would pull him down and remind him that, yes, he was yet another bottom dweller in the world of world wide web card games.




But on that night, it was all going to change. "Yes", he told himself, "tonight I will become a star. I will reach for the heavens and drink wine with Patrick Antonius. Yes, I will be able to buy handguns with a scope on it." He was aiming really high, as high as his wildest dreams allowed him to.

His plan was ingenious and fail-proof. He was going to turn stone into gold, and gold into platinum. He was going to be rich, he was going to change the world. What can you buy with 10 dollars? A loaf of bread and balloons? Maybe, in some countries. That wasn't enough for him. He wanted 100,000 dollars, so he could buy himself whatever he wanted, anything at all. If he got lucky enough, he could even buy himself some hot furniture porn memoribilia.



He embarked on his long journey with nothing but that 10.00 and a big pair of testicles. He knew the road would be tough, but he knew his abilities and charisma would get him through. He debuted his quest at some of the lowest, darkest, and slimiest of tables. The world of Twien-Ti-Faiv En Nel was dangerous to any human being with any sense of decency. It was filled with creatures this writer would not dare describe. They lacked all sense of moral values, or intelligence for that matter. They would often lurk in the shadows, waiting for a chance to pounce on their newest victim. They were tenacious fiends these ones, oh yes, they could keep coming over and over until they ripped your heart out with their tenebrous tactics. It took someone like Jerry to enter those lands. His aim was to double up his money really quick, before they could strike him down. And he did, he bravely put all of his money on the table and flopped a set. He snickered at his two opponents who were simply left stunned by Jerry's display of courage and ultimate power. They were flabbergasted, to say the least.



After his victorious victory in the lands of Twien-Ti-Faiv En Nel, Jerry set himself on conquering the equally dark territory of Hon-Dret En Nel, its neighboring province. Bottom dwellers would often find themselves here, they were very stealthy creatures, and merciless in their ability to out-twit and outlast. The most feared of them all were the extremely deceiving Por-Ti breed. If you met them, you would cry. They can drive the sanest of men to the edge of insanity. That didn't bother Jerry, as he was on a quest of all quests, a quest to end misery. He attacked them with the best of his powers, and at the peak of his push many people came in adoration of his extremely well-sharpened set of testicles. He often overheard them talking of his prowesses and ability to terrify his opponents. He appreciated the support but his eyes were on the big prize. He only needed 3 dollars more to move up to the golden lands of Tu-Hon-Dret En Nel, where the final goal would be easier to see.



His battles were fierce, and worthy of a well-written book. However, his last breath came rather quickly as the extremely well-ribbed condom wrapper rings were all after his treasure. He courageously pushed one of them with a pocket pair, the one next to his giant pair of balls. However, the Poa-Kar Se Tar gods had a plan in mind for the great warrior Jerry. The ever so-present Ace was part of it, and unfortunately for our hero, the quest ended there, in a pool of tears and regrets, as his shiny and golden treasure evaporated in front of his eyes. The merciless condom wrapper rings, these damned dark dwellers, were ravaging the loot and cackling away with it.



It was a sad night for Jerry, a very cold and lonely night. He will go to bed on this day knowing that he did his best, but that in the end he is nothing but a man with a dream. Poor little Jerry...

[GSykes]

Some people try to hard

[b33nz]

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zomg, u stole g2cu's gun. now what will he use to protect his ship it holla mansion???

[chief_]

very nice stakemonster A+

[IRuleYouHard]

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Some people try to hard

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You sir are an embarrasment to us all.
OP: A+++++++++++++++++++++++

[kickpushcoast]

25NL:dangerous to any human being with any sense of decency

aint that the MFin truth
well done OP