What is the most tragic thing you've ever had to deal with

[ContactGSW]

Just ask him if he was Marphanoid. This would lead to a disecting aortic aneurysm as the most common cause of sudden unexpected death. Other causes of what a lay man would term a "heart attack" in a very young person is manifestations of Kawasaki's disease, which can cause death 15 or 20 years after the initial incident.

[GeraldGiraffe]

I've never suffered something tragic in the sense that someone close to me has died, but I've been on the fringes of tragic events in other people's lives which still had an effect on me.

One of my good friends from school's father died in the weeks prior to her 18th birthday. He was a farmer, and was examining the front end of a combine harvester when the clutch slipped. He didn't die instantly, but on the way to the hospital in the air ambulance. She was, understandably, devastated. Hundreds of people turned up for the funeral though, which I think gave her some comfort. She had initially cancelled her 18th birthday party, but we threw one for her anyway, which I hope helped. (pretty sure it did.)

Secondly, Another of my good friends from school suffered the insanely tragic loss of her younger brother, who literally dropped dead one day having been perfectly healthy. He had a rare sort of brain tumour. Again, from this it's clear to me that the people who are around you when you suffer a tragic loss are what is important - she was a very strong person, but I'm sure she was only made more capable to deal with her brother's death as a result of so many people being sad about it. Collective grief? I don't know.

It feels weird that I've never gone through anything like this personally, and I'm dreading it.

[adsman]

The most tragic thing that I've had to deal with is OOT in the last two weeks.

[kcheel]

Actually the most tragic thing I have had to deal with to date just started two days ago. I have always known that life can be brutal sometimes but I found out first hand for myself.

I have 3 older sisters and I received a call on Tues. from the youngest one to let me know our oldest sister was in the hospital. She was admitted with problems with her gall bladder and the doctors feared she could possibly have cancer. I felt like I had been punched in the stomach when I heard the that word.

My sister is just an unreal person. Never met anyone who knows her that doesn't love her. Outgoing and energetic and caring and just full of life. She means the world to me.

The surgery was planned for yesterday and unfortunately I could not be there for it as she is in a hospital about 3 1/2 hours away and I had business obligations. I received a call from my Mom after it was over to let me know that they ended up not even removing her gall bladder because she was eat up with cancer and the doctors said there was no need to bother with going through the surgery.

She has stage 4 cancer. Its inoperable and uncurable. Only thing they offered is trying chemo to try and slow it down. So now she has the choice of living out her last few months to the best of her ability or doing chemo and maybe getting a year or so and dealing with the side effects. What a choice.

For the first time in probably almost 30 years, I cried myself to sleep last night. I can't imagine my big sis not being around for the holidays. Not being there for me when I need some advice on something. I can't imagine the pain/loss her husband of 32 years and her daughter are going to feel.

My Mom just quit her job this morning. Guess she plans to spend every possible minute with her while she can. I intend to go see her probably tomorrow. Feel bad because I am not already there. I want to be able to be strong for her and not break down in front of her but I can't see that happening. I just feel numb right now.

[Big Bend]

Wow, am VERY sorry to hear about your sister and what your family is going through. Don't worry about "being strong" for her, you can break down and cry with her, its OK. It will help actually. I've found that people who are terminally ill are often the strong ones, trying to comfort those around them. Just do what you can to be there and help her family. Enjoy those moments you have left together, and be thankful for all the times you've shared in the past. You can get through this.

Take care.. BB

[AceLuby]

The most tragic thing I've had to deal with happened to me about 8 months ago. I went to go visit my dad after partying the night before w/ friends and found him dead in the bathroom. It was the most traumatic thing I've ever dealt with.

He had cancer about 2-3 years prior, had a bunch of surgery's and chemo to remove it and he survived. However, because it was in his throat he was unable to eat solid foods and he had lots of back problems. Because of this he was put on HEAVY doses of oxycotin (sp?). He lived w/ it for 1-2 years until he accidently overdosed. Really, I'm still dealing with it and even writing about it is really hard.

[scorer]

1986 i came home to get my uniform for work and found my mother dead from suicide. Add to that, that my relationship with my father was non existant and i had no other family

[orange]

sorry to hear kc. my best to your sister.

check this out if you havent already- professors last speech after cancer realization

[EyeJackit]

When I was 24 years old my father sat me down and told me that he had something to tell about the last few months.

After having difficulty with urination he went to get his prostate checked out. The typical examination and testing gave a diagnoses of prostate cancer. He had been having some serious back issues for a few months and further testing revealed that it had engulfed his prostate and metastasized into both his spine and rib ends. For anyone who doesn't know it, bone cancer is a terrible, painful way to die.

The Oncologist had told Dad to get his house in order because he had at most 6 months to live. As well, if he wanted to live for 6 months he needed to be castrated to slow the progress of the cancer.


Now Dad was born in the 40's and played professional hockey back in the days before I was born...no one was going to castrate him. He actually said, "This guy must be a [censored] moron to think he is taking my balls and if he is a moron then I am getting a second opinion."


I will be 38 on Saturday and my dad will be at dinner with all of us, my son will insist on sitting beside his grandpa. He has shown no evidence of cancer in over 10 years.


Keep the faith kcheel.

[kcheel]

[ QUOTE ]
When I was 24 years old my father sat me down and told me that he had something to tell about the last few months.

After having difficulty with urination he went to get his prostate checked out. The typical examination and testing gave a diagnoses of prostate cancer. He had been having some serious back issues for a few months and further testing revealed that it had engulfed his prostate and metastasized into both his spine and rib ends. For anyone who doesn't know it, bone cancer is a terrible, painful way to die.

The Oncologist had told Dad to get his house in order because he had at most 6 months to live. As well, if he wanted to live for 6 months he needed to be castrated to slow the progress of the cancer.


Now Dad was born in the 40's and played professional hockey back in the days before I was born...no one was going to castrate him. He actually said, "This guy must be a [censored] moron to think he is taking my balls and if he is a moron then I am getting a second opinion."


I will be 38 on Saturday and my dad will be at dinner with all of us, my son will insist on sitting beside his grandpa. He has shown no evidence of cancer in over 10 years.


Keep the faith kcheel.

[/ QUOTE ]


Thanks alot for sharing that story. Thanks to you others that replied also.

Orange: I will be sure to check out that link. Have never seen it before.