I need advice on achieving my goals wrt sexual intercourse

[madnak]

Bear with me. This is a forum for any kind of SFW discussion, after all. And Lord knows I don't want it in OOT.

People in the Dorm are saying, again, that it's so easy to get laid in college. This is a little bit discouraging to a person like me. I figure I have to take the right point of view. Sex in college may not be "easy" for me, per se, but given that it's easy in general (by most accounts), if I'm ever going to learn to get laid this is the place to start.

Great! What next?

Honestly now. Without sexually harassing anyone, what is the process of "getting laid?" I'm posting this in the Lounge, so please spare the normal OOT-y stuff. Talk like a scientist, or Dungeons and Dragons player. Pretend I have Asperger's - turns out I may. I don't know how to dance, I don't know how to "chill," I don't listen to music, my interests include science, philosophy, and nerdy video games, I'm marginally ugly, and most everything related to social interaction goes way over my head. Also I'm not very confident. This is what you have to work with.

What I do have going for me is an almost complete lack of standards. And courage. I'm willing to approach girls, etc. I don't really know how to do so, and so far my experiments have resulted in strictly platonic liasons, and I wouldn't have the slightest clue how to get from there to anywhere. I've also tried online - I've sent dozens of messages to people on AdultFriendFinder and Craigslist Casual Encounters, but have received probably no more than three responses, all of which have been "gentle let-downs." Maybe it's the pictures. (but recently I manage to score 7.4 on Hot or Not, so that should help!)

So give me a game plan! Oh yeah, I'm poor too. Did I forget to mention that I'm poor? Or I'd definitely fly out to Thailand or something. But no, I'm broke and likely to remain that way as my only reasonable source of income just recently dried up.

Many of you are out in the big bad world at large, and must have observed something of the sequence of events that results in people "getting down." Process analysis, please?

[MrWookie]

I know you don't want this in OOT, but it's really not a Lounge thread. I'm going to move it to the Dorm, and if benevolent loungers feel like chiming in, good for them.

[dhaimon]

just go out, find a girl at the bar walk over to her, smile and say something like this:

"hey i saw you standing here and you looked like an interesting person so i thought i'd introduce myself, my name is XXXXX". then whenever you're about to leave ask the girl if she wants to come to your place.

repeat this one billion times, who cares if you're shot down, you're never gonna see her again and you'll get better with practice.

if that fails do a forum search for "the obvious guide" and you'll find some stuff on one night stands by diebitter & co. personally i hate these kind of "guides" but it might work for you.

[thedustbustr]

people here say it's easy because its cool to say it. it isn't any easier for the ugly half of 2p2 to get laid than it is for you.

[dhaimon]

[ QUOTE ]
people here say it's easy because its cool to say it. it isn't any easier for the ugly half of 2p2 to get laid than it is for you.

[/ QUOTE ]

this is true as well

[FortunaMaximus]

Fair enough.

Any good at +EV games? Build it.

Get a good hairdresser, preferably female, strike up a relationship with her. Tell her what you want, tell her she can go nuts. Trust her. It won't be just about the hair.

Volunteer your time in places where you'd be interested, and where many SFW's work/play. Libraries, for instance. It's ok to be quiet. Just develop the confidence in the silent relationships.

Money != success and you know this. But it does make things easier.

Fallback approach if you've still got that last-step confidence, great escort agency, blah, blah. Vegas does all this well, but most major metros have a structure in place. Don't ask, don't tell.

You're not paying for the act, you're paying for what they can teach you.

All in all, this would be an optimal approach for geeks. Ask Bill. He didn't jump from the garage to Melinda overnight.

[traz]

Talk and flirt with all the girls you can, in as many situations as possible

[traz]

And by flirt I mean, make jokes, be playful, have fun.

Putting your self in an environment where girls are getting drunk makes things exponentially easier

[madnak]

[ QUOTE ]
And by flirt I mean, make jokes, be playful, have fun.

[/ QUOTE ]

Easier said than done, but I try. Still, it seems to end up platonic. If you flirt appropriately does the girl just start ripping her clothes off? I assume there are some in-between steps.

[ QUOTE ]
Putting your self in an environment where girls are getting drunk makes things exponentially easier

[/ QUOTE ]

Exponentially? How can I do this? I've tried going to bars and ordering a couple drinks (which I can't even afford now [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img] ) and it doesn't seem to work. Hard to even catch a girl's eye, and they ALWAYS travel in packs! And these were supposed to be singles bars. Plus I hate the environment.

Parties? I wouldn't know how to get invited to one, a "real" one anyhow. Hmm.

[madnak]

[ QUOTE ]
just go out, find a girl at the bar walk over to her, smile and say something like this:

"hey i saw you standing here and you looked like an interesting person so i thought i'd introduce myself, my name is XXXXX". then whenever you're about to leave ask the girl if she wants to come to your place.

[/ QUOTE ]

Sounds so simple, but it never seems to work out this way. Something always goes awry, and I can rarely seem to find a woman in isolation. In the movies there's always this pretty woman standing there in the corner, just waiting for someone to walk up to her. In reality, it's more like NOISENOISENOISE and people everywhere and nobody's alone except me.

The guides have never been much help, at least the "PUA" guides aren't.