a crash course in prenups

[chesspain]

[ QUOTE ]
any woman that won't sign a prenup...isn't actually in love with you.

[/ QUOTE ]

Any women who won't sign a prenup which pertains to assets acquired after marriage...actually has a brain in her head, especially if she plans to bear your children.

[guids]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
any woman that won't sign a prenup...isn't actually in love with you.

[/ QUOTE ]

Any women who won't sign a prenup which pertains to assets acquired after marriage...actually has a brain in her head, especially if she plans to bear your children.

[/ QUOTE ]

The whole notion of a 50/50 marriage, in todays society is by and large total [censored].

[Fast Food Knight]

[ QUOTE ]
seriously, I wouldnt care in the least, and will def have as airtight of a prenup as possible guaranteeing anything I earn is mine if we split, no matter what.

[/ QUOTE ]


Very smart, IMO... but it leads me to another question I've struggled with. I hate the whole halving approach that is the norm in divorces, but consider this: you settle down and marry a hot little gal. Suddenly your club, or restaurant, or bar, or whatever investment you pursue takes off and you make lots of money. Ten years down the line, you and the Mrs Guids decide to have kids. You tell her you want her to stay home to raise the kids because you can afford it and you would rather have her raise your kids than strangers, so you both agree to do that. Fast forward to ten years down the line, she isn't looking so hot anymore, kids have put a stress on the marriage, and you want out. Do you still feel as if you shouldn't give her ANYTHING even though she has nothing and you both had agreed that you would bring home the bacon while she would raise kids and maintain a household? Obviously it's money that you solely earned, and I don't think something as simple as "half" would ever be the answer. But I feel like if two people agree to a setup like that, it's not exactly fair for one of them to be completely busto at the end of putting a lot of hard work into it. I can't really wrap my head around how I think, ethically, this should be dealt with.

EDIT: all of this is excluding child support

[guids]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
seriously, I wouldnt care in the least, and will def have as airtight of a prenup as possible guaranteeing anything I earn is mine if we split, no matter what.

[/ QUOTE ]


Very smart, IMO... but it leads me to another question I've struggled with. I hate the whole halving approach that is the norm in divorces, but consider this: you settle down and marry a hot little gal. Suddenly your club, or restaurant, or bar, or whatever investment you pursue takes off and you make lots of money. Ten years down the line, you and the Mrs Guids decide to have kids. You tell her you want her to stay home to raise the kids because you can afford it and you would rather have her raise your kids than strangers, so you both agree to do that. Fast forward to ten years down the line, she isn't looking so hot anymore, kids have put a stress on the marriage, and you want out. Do you still feel as if you shouldn't give her ANYTHING even though she has nothing and you both had agreed that you would bring home the bacon while she would raise kids and maintain a household? Obviously it's money that you solely earned, and I don't think something as simple as "half" would ever be the answer. But I feel like if two people agree to a setup like that, it's not exactly fair for one of them to be completely busto at the end of putting a lot of hard work into it. I can't really wrap my head around how I think, ethically, this should be dealt with.

EDIT: all of this is excluding child support

[/ QUOTE ]


I dunno, imo, I personally think if you are good father/husband there is no reason that having kids makes the chick deserved of anything after a divorce. In your example she had 10 whole years to earn her own money, I didntn force anything on her, so if she chose to sit on her ass and spend my money (which I have NO problem with at all) that is her perogative, but Im not going to bail her out if we get divorced. Yes, they give birth, but if Im making a lot of money, I dont need to work as hard as we are secure, I can burden A LOT of the load of raising the kids, Id be happy to in all honesty because I love kids (I have an 11 year old brother and a 1 year old niece that taught me this). But in all reality, the logistics of raising kids isnt too tough once they hit 5 or 6, they are in school 8 hours a day, so there is no reason for her to sit around the house, so if she wants to get a job, and just sack that money away while spending mine..again..no problem imo, but if god forbid we have a falling out there is no way Im going to give her much.


A lot of people probably think Im an [censored] here, but the girl that I plan on marrying is going to be independent and smart enough that any blame is going to be solely on her because it was laziness on her part more than anything else.

[Fast Food Knight]

I guess I was assuming that you would be working a lot. Also assuming that she popped out a kid every 3 years, meaning basically an infant around at all times. But yeah I see your perspective.

[maxtower]

The obvious solution to all this is just to not get married. Why would you get married these days. No one really cares if you just live together as bf and gf anymore.

Or if its that big of a deal for your parents, just get a wedding ceremony, and don't make it legal.

[CharlieDontSurf]

I'm not gonna ever ask a woman i marry to be a stay at home so this is why im so full on prenup. Plus unless the marriage ends badly i.e. she cheats...I'd give her a portion of stuff..i.e sell the house and split it with her etc regardless

[guids]

[ QUOTE ]
I guess I was assuming that you would be working a lot. Also assuming that she popped out a kid every 3 years, meaning basically an infant around at all times. But yeah I see your perspective.

[/ QUOTE ]


the other factor is, I really dont plan on getting married for another 10 years or so, so Ill be about 35, and hope to have the bulk of my money earned already, and this is by design more than anything.

[Bork]

Does a man who has less assets and less earning power have anything to gain by signing a pre-nup?

[gumpzilla]

guids,

If she stayed at home to take care of the kids and do the cooking (my impression is that you're looking for a very conventional domestic woman), she is saving you lots and lots of money that you would have otherwise spent. So in some sense, a good chunk of what you sock away during the marriage is money you earned precisely because she was in a spot to be taken advantage of in that way.