Short stories through consumerism : a proposed game

[gumpzilla]

So, it seems like a lot of supermarkets/Wal-Marts these days sell just about everything. Back in college, I had to make an unusual cluster of purchases one day. The reaction from the cashier was priceless - she looked at me in horror and disdain and asked if she should just throw everything in the bucket. Afterwards, I thought that it would be an entertaining game to try and come up with the best choice of four distinct items for maximum effect, or that tell the best story.

I'd forgotten about this for a while, but a post in another thread reminded me of it and I think OOT could have some fun with it. To my mind, good entries should have a certain degree of randomness yet feel somehow unified. Also, no danglers; I feel like everything should contribute in some way to the overall picture. To give a starting place, here's what I purchased that day (complete with bullets for the bullet lovers):
[*] a giant plastic bucket, large enough that a person could easily sit inside[*] 3 boxes of condoms[*] a jar of Tostitos queso dip[*] the Holy Bible

Your turn!

[threeonefour]

vaseline, whip cream in a can, panty hose (i am assuming a guy is going to do the purchasing), mayonnaise.


all items look fairly innocuous grouped with other products (maybe not the hose if you are a dude) but combined they create an effect.

mayonnaise should probably be substituted for something else, but ill leave that for someone else to improve on.

[JasonK]

Knife, rope, duct tape, ski mask.

[gumpzilla]

[ QUOTE ]
Knife, rope, duct tape, ski mask.

[/ QUOTE ]

See, this seems too standard to me. I want more left-field entries.

[TiK]

Ok, I'm just gonna adjust my post from that other thread.

1. Home Pregnancy Test (1)
2. Wire Clothes Hanger (1)
3. Garbage bag
4. Pack of chewing gum (1) (to throw the cashier off the trail)

[Klompy]

1.shovel
2.lime
3.ski mask
4.rope
5.large knife
6.lube

bonus points for 7. if they sell chloroform.

[mason55]

pregnancy test
condoms
push pins

[amplify]

1. smock
2. orangutan
3. putty
4. lentils

[VespaRally]

1. Sudoku Puzzle Book
2. Baby Wipes

[VespaRally]

1. William Hung's CD Inspiration from clearance
2. Motion lotion
3. A Book of baby names
4. An apology card
5. Reality®, the female condom
6. 14 cases of whip cream
8. zig-zags
9. simon