Calling all crime solvers (maybe NSFW pics?)

[Araklion]

how could it possibly not have been 'Mike'?

[Badger]

I had a friend that [censored] himself while drinking. He didn't pull his pants down though, which Mike would have needed to do here. I'm not sure what standard protocol is for [censored] where you shouldn't while drunk. DNA testing time.

[Rushmore]

I cannot come up with a Big Lebowski joke here.

But I didn't really try very hard, to be honest.

[kipin]

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- Actual size of evidence? Show some scale, perhaps hold it in your hand so we can judge the size.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'll work on this in a second.


[ QUOTE ]

- Where exactly in the room is this? Near the screen door? Dead middle of the floor?


[/ QUOTE ]

Pretty much dead center of the floor.

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- How much alcohol was involved?


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Just beer, I passed out first when everyone had probably consumed like 5 or 6. Mike does however have a history of drinking until he blacks out. He seems to have no off-mechanism when it comes to drinking.

[ QUOTE ]

- Does Mike have a history of doing outrageous things?


[/ QUOTE ]

Like I said he has pissed himself before, and pissed on a pile of clothes, but he has no history of doing malicious things, or [censored] himself.

[z28dreams]

I also think that your roommates should comment on Mike's state of mind before going to bed.

If he was acting ridiculous and high energy, he may have done this to be funny.

[Los Feliz Slim]

It WAS Mike, but there was also a second pooper on the grassy knoll.

[Boris]

funny effin story man. I would try and do a mental inventory of how much beer was in the house on Tuesday afternoon. Then find out how much remained on Wednesday morning. That way you can kinda figure out how much Pooper Mike had to drink. Was there any sign of ass wipage?

[Cablelessray]

similar thing happened at a family friend's pool when they threw a july 4th bbq when i was younger... a floater came up in the pool and there were so many kids noone knew who it was. it was funny [censored] though, and to this day i'm pretty sure i know who did it cause one of the kids wasn't outside when it was first seen ( think he [censored] and then went inside... then people saw it)

lolz

[kipin]

OK I just took a picture of the turd with a quarter as a reference, and holy christ that smelled awful.

Anyway, picture is here.

Exhibit D

[Badger]

[ QUOTE ]
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- Actual size of evidence? Show some scale, perhaps hold it in your hand so we can judge the size.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'll work on this in a second.


[ QUOTE ]

- Where exactly in the room is this? Near the screen door? Dead middle of the floor?


[/ QUOTE ]

Pretty much dead center of the floor.

I think if he needed to go he would have leaned against the wall. If he did it, this could have been a practical joke.

[ QUOTE ]

- How much alcohol was involved?


[/ QUOTE ]

Just beer, I passed out first when everyone had probably consumed like 5 or 6. Mike does however have a history of drinking until he blacks out. He seems to have no off-mechanism when it comes to drinking.

Just beer doesn't make it hard for him to reach black out levels. My roommate walked into the emergency room with a concussion and .389 BAC drinking just beer. The doctor was dumbfounded. This was in the early afternoon.

[ QUOTE ]

- Does Mike have a history of doing outrageous things?


[/ QUOTE ]

Like I said he has pissed himself before, and pissed on a pile of clothes, but he has no history of doing malicious things, or [censored] himself.

Aame with my friend, Pete, who [censored] himself. One Halloween our window was broken, and sure enough Pete shows up the next morning with bloody knuckles. Says he blacked out, but was pretty sure he wasn't near our house. Months later while talking to a neighbor about stuff he comments "Oh yeah, we saw Zoolander break your window on Halloween." Pete was dressed as Zoolander the night in question.


[/ QUOTE ]
I think you need to go with my DNA test idea. Loser pays for the test. There's gotta be some DNA in poop right?